Inspired by a post of Australian AUs by castlefanfics over on tumblr.
This may have been his worst idea yet.
He wanted to experience Australia, not just the tourist attractions and major cities, but at this exact moment, he's wondering why.
"Dad!"
"Keep calm, sweetheart."
He's well aware that it's difficult advice to follow when his voice is three octaves higher than usual.
He's never seen a snake like this before in his life, and he figures that doesn't exactly bode well for their chances of survival.
He was warned about the animals in Australia.
His mother gave him a particularly long lecture about how every deadly animal in existence inhabits the country, and up until now he thought she was exaggerating.
Why the hell did he ever think it would be a good place to take his eight-year-old daughter on vacation?
The snake is huge, and eyeing the table that they're balanced on as if it looks like a good place to be, and why did he leave the door open again?
"Daddy," Alexis is whimpering, and the reversion to Daddy has his heart in pieces because she must be truly terrified.
"It'll be okay."
He has no clue how, because beyond throwing Alexis off the table towards the door and telling her to run for it, he has no plan.
Besides that, there are probably a million more snakes outside, so staying on the table until this snake dies is possibly preferable.
"Is everything okay?"
His eyes snap from the reptile to the door, where a woman stands, completely unaffected by the snake mere feet from her. She's inching her way into the house, and he narrows his eyes at how presumptive she's being, just letting herself in.
"What are you doing?"
She's inches from the thing, and getting closer, and before he can warn her to get away while she still can, she's opening the double doors that lead out to the back yard.
"Do you want to let more of them in?" He demands, his anger sounding suspiciously like fear, and she laughs softly, sliding the doors open slowly and grinning when the snake takes the opportunity to escape, slithering right past her and into the back yard.
She slides the doors shut behind it, clicking the lock into place and closing the front door as he helps Alexis off the table. Before he can move past his embarrassment and thank the stranger, Alexis is launching herself at the woman, thanking her profusely.
"They're more afraid of you then you are of them," she explains to Alexis, who is still shaking in fear and relief as he steps onto the ground. Alexis eyes her doubtfully, and the woman smiles.
"Besides, that was just a python. Wouldn't have hurt you."
"Just a python?" He cries, incredulous, and the woman has the nerve to laugh at him.
"Nothing to worry about," she affirms, and he rolls his eyes.
"I think we're going to find a hotel room on the fiftieth floor where no snakes can find us," he says decidedly, thankful that they've barely had a chance to unpack their bags. Clearly renting a house was a bad idea.
She chuckles, her arms still around Alexis, who is clutching the woman as if she's some kind of hero.
Which apparently she's not, because it was only a python and nothing to worry about.
"Won't find any buildings with fifty floors in far north Queensland, Mr Castle," she says, her voice teasing, but he's distracted by her words.
"How do you know who I am?"
"We do have books in Australia," she grins, nudging Alexis and making her laugh, and how the hell is this woman making his daughter giggle when mere minutes ago she was in tears?
"Well," he clears his throat, intent on voicing his appreciation, even if his pride is being disagreeable. "Thank you, for saving us from that "harmless" python…"
"Kate," she finishes, shrugging off the gratitude. "No problem."
"I'd invite you to join us for lunch to thank you, Kate, but I don't think we'll be staying in this snake-infested town."
She thinks he's overreacting, he can read it in the way her eyes dance in amusement, but his first thought was to find a flight back to New York immediately. Driving until they hit a major city is a compromise.
"But daddy, the kangaroos…"
Dammit.
Alexis is looking up at him with wide eyes, evidently braver than he is, because the one thing she wanted to do in Australia was feed kangaroos, which they'd planned to do this afternoon.
His gaze flickers to Kate, an idea forming instantly.
"Well maybe Kate could join us… Protect us from the snakes?"
He grins at her, tries to appear a little more charming and a little less terrified, and she returns the smile.
"I'd love to. Besides, it's the crocs you have to worry about…"
tumblr: l03l