A/N: This is a story near and dear to my heart. The full story is epic, full of twists and turns and hurt. I don't know if I'll ever get that full thing written, but I'm going to try. This is a song fic, done to the song I think best represents the characters – Keep on Loving You by REO Speedwagon. I don't own the song. I only own the character of Nicollette Lee/Knight, the rest of the characters mentioned belong to their respective players.
Keep On Loving You
20 years ago – Prague, Czech Republic
One of the last places Nicollette Lee expected to end up in was Prague, Czech Republic. She'd been making her way west for years now, stopping along the way and staying one place or another before moving on once more. It was the gypsy blood in her that kept her moving. Always moving. She'd arrived a few weeks ago and had met a few of the locals that frequented this bar in the castle on the hill. The owner, Emerald, was particularly beautiful and charming. Nic suspected it was the blood that ran in her veins.
She was seated at a table, sipping a glass of wyne and conversing with Emerald the night her life changed irrevocably. He sauntered in, his demeanor giving off "I don't give a fuck" vibes. Tall, dark and sexy was one way to describe him. He must have stood at least a foot taller than her, his dark hair messy in a sexy, I just rolled out of bed kind of way. His eyes were covered by black wrap around sunglasses, even in the dim interior. Nic knew him for what he was immediately.
Emerald had stood, and Nic rose as well as he approached. Emerald received a peck on the cheek before smiling up at him and turning to introduce him. "Nic, this is AJ Knight. He is family," she said. "AJ, Nicollette Lee."
"Pleasure," he said, and clasped her hand when she extended it. He raised it to his mouth and brushed his lips across the back of it before releasing it back to her.
His accent, Australian she thought, caught Nic's attention. "The pleasure is mine, I'm sure," she'd replied and smiled.
"Nic is new in town," Emerald informed AJ.
"Another transplant, hmmm Em?" AJ had drawled.
"You sound as if you aren't from here yourself, Mr. Knight."
"Mr. Knight was my father. Please, call me AJ. And you're right. I haven't been here much longer than you, I'd guess," he said.
Emerald excused herself to attend to some business, but AJ and Nic sat at the table and talked. Minutes or hours, Nic was never sure how long but they were drawn to each other. It wasn't until another woman walked into the bar that Nic realized what had happened.
The woman was obviously lost, or at least very new to the area. AJ rose and went to the bar and started speaking to her. Nic sat in her seat and watched as jealousy reared it's ugly head. She grabbed hold of her emotions with a firm hand, tamping them down. She had no right, none whatsoever, to feel this way. They'd just met, and they certainly weren't a couple. Her hand clenched into a fist as she wrestled with herself. Nic was so involved in her internal argument she almost didn't see or hear AJ return. She forcibly opened her hand and pasted a smile on her face.
"Jealous?" he asked with a knowing smirk.
"I have no reason to be jealous, AJ. After all, you and I have just met. It's not as if we're together and you belong to me," she pointed out reasonably.
He nodded, a thoughtful look on his face. "Of course," he said. He reached for a napkin that was on the table and with a pen he'd picked up from the bartender, he started sketching. Nic watched, fascinated. She had no artistic talent whatsoever, and the creative process was something she loved watching. A simple but elegant rose was quickly etched onto the napkin. With a grin he slid it across the table to her. "A beautiful rose for a beautiful woman," he said as he stood. "I look forward to seeing you again soon, Nic." With a wink in her direction he left the way he'd come in.
It was all Nic could do not to stare as he walked out. Once he was out of sight, she looked down at the flower drawn on the napkin and a smile caressed her lips. She picked it up and tucked it away safely before disappearing into the night herself.
Many years later that same design would both stand on her beside table and be etched forever into her skin on the inside of her right wrist.
You should have seen by the look in my eyes, baby, there was something missing.
You should have known by the tone of my voice, maybe, but you didn't listen.
You played dead, but you never bled. Instead you laid still in the grass, all coiled up and hissing.
15 years ago – Brunswick, Maine
"I want a divorce, AJ," the words were spoken quietly, civilly. A part of her broke, even as she asked him for her freedom. "I've... I need my freedom." She couldn't quite bring herself to say the words. I've fallen in love with someone else. It was like one part of her was standing outside her body, watching another person who looked like her, talked like her, ruin her life. The part of her that was doing the talking, however, knew what she wanted, and at the moment it wasn't AJ.
AJ looked at her in shock. "What?" He blinked rapidly once, twice and suddenly a new calm flowed over him. "You want a divorce?" he said in a deceptively quiet voice.
"I've already spoken to Jade, she's drawing the papers up. I'm sorry. I never wanted to hurt you." And it was the truth. This is what they did. They hurt each other, they split up. "We just can't seem to make it work, can we?" she said with a half smile.
Aiden was the exact opposite in some ways from AJ, and in others, he was nearly the same. Nic wasn't sure what it was that drew her to him, but she felt the need to explore it. She was many things, but Nic prided herself on not being a cheat.
AJ hadn't said anything else that night. He'd been rightfully angry with her. But later, when Nic went to sign the papers that would dissolve her marriage to AJ Knight, she noted that he had already signed. In blood.
You know I know all about those men, still I don't remember.
She had been married several times. AJ was her first husband. Taylen Deluc had been someone who understood her in a way that AJ hadn't. Tay was from the same place of darkness, the shadows. They had met at a club in Vegas and gotten to know each other by manipulating the shadows, trying to outdo each other. She had thought him dead, killed by the Prince to save her life.
Then there was Val. Jacob Valintine had been an impulse decision. She'd been lonely. AJ had been gone with no word for months, and along came this man, promising the world. He wouldn't leave her so often without a word, he'd said. How could anyone leave her? She'd realized her huge mistake only after they'd been married and he had become controlling. She had fled. Only one person knew where to find her, but would he even bother?
xxx
10 years ago – Prague, Czech Republic
She was sitting in a chair, reading the newspaper when she heard the scrape of the door opening. She didn't even glance up as she heard the footsteps approaching. "I wondered when you would show up," Nic said as he walked into the area she had set up as a living room. "Your guys are getting sloppy. I spotted them two days after I arrived." Finally she set the paper aside, raising her hazel eyes to meet his sky blue ones.
AJ regarded her thoughtfully as he took a seat across from her. "Why'd you run this time, Nic?"
She shrugged. "Why not? Maybe I just felt trapped. I was stupid, you know, diving into that marriage." She smirked a bit. "But then again, I seem to do a lot of stupid things. Why did you come?"
"To bring you home," he said simply.
She leaned back and closed her eyes. "Home," she said softly. "I don't even know where that is anymore, AJ."
AJ watched her close her eyes and he wondered, not for the first time, what he was doing chasing her half way around the world. Why did he care if she holed up in the Czech Republic or Brunswick, Maine? Why did he care if she was here alone? Hadn't she ditched him and jumped into a marriage with that idiot who now was wandering around like a lost puppy?
Your home is with me, he wanted to say, but he didn't. He wondered briefly if they would ever stop hurting each other. "You know that your home is back in Brunswick. You owe it to yourself to at least kick that loser out of your house," he said finally. As expected, her mouth twitched with amusement.
"Is he already redecorating it and moving his new wife in?" she asked.
AJ shook his head. "No, I think he's still hoping you'll come back to him. He doesn't get you, Nico."
Val never had gotten her. He pretended, but for crying out loud the man had given her a Mustang for a gift! Anyone who knew her even a little bit knew she just doesn't do cars. A good, sturdy pickup truck. The bigger the better in her opinion. Val hadn't been happy when AJ swooped in to present her with a brand new shiny black pickup, customized for her shortly after he'd given her the car.
Nic raised a brow as she finally opened her eyes to look at him again. "Ya think?" she replied sarcastically.
AJ, in his nonchalant way, just shrugged.
Nic rolled her eyes and got up heading for the bar area she kept stocked. "You want something to drink? I have Everclear."
"I should probably be going," he replied, standing.
She shook her head. "It's nearly dawn. You can spend the day. I'll crash down here, you can have the bed."
AJ smirked. "How about I crash down here, and you take the bed."
"Guests should get the bed," she shot back.
"Don't be ridiculous, Nico. We can share the bed. I'll sleep on top of the covers."
That brought her up short. Finally she nodded. "Alright," she said quietly. She poured herself a shot of Everclear and threw it back quickly. It burned her throat. She didn't care. She smiled and stepped out from the bar, taking the bottle with her. "Shall we?" she asked, indicating the stairs up to the only bedroom in the warehouse.
xxx
Then there had been Duane. What had started as a hot one night stand had quickly turned into something more. He was immortal, but not vampire. He had a great dislike for vampires, with the exception of a few. She had fallen for him hard, only to have him killed in an attack. It had been enough to drive her from Brunswick for the last time.
Cause it was us, baby way before then, and we're still together.
20 years ago – Prague, Czech Republic
Fingernails painted silver tapped against the rim of the goblet that sat in front of her. The barbell that pierced her tongue clicked against her teeth as she gazed over the room, her eyes never lingering long on one person.
He appeared almost out of nowhere. One moment he wasn't there, the next he was in her line of sight and heading toward her table. Nic smiled when he stopped in front of her. "Good eve, AJ," she said quietly.
"Nic," he replied with a slight inclination of his head. "May I join you?"
"Of course. Would you like a glass of wyne?" she asked as he sat down across from her.
He shook his head. "No, thanks. Anything exciting going on today?" he asked, nodding toward the crowd that had gathered in the small bar.
Nic raised the goblet to her lips and took a drink before replying. "Same old, same old. You know, it's the same everywhere. The mortals want to hook up. The kindred want the mortals. Not that there's anything wrong with either scenario, it's just boring to watch." A grin crossed her face. "Unless, of course, you're the one doing the hooking up."
AJ just watched her through the sunglasses he wore. Or Nic assumed he was watching her. She couldn't see his eyes through the dark lenses. She gestured toward his face. "You always wear those? It kind of draws attention, don't you think?"
He chuckled. "Haven't you been paying attention around here, Nic? I'm not any more of a freak than you or anyone else is."
She raised a brow.
"I've seen you walking around here with the tips of your hair dyed baby blue," he chuckled.
Nic dropped her eyes to the table and grinned.
As the bar started clearing out, Nic found herself more drawn to him. They had been talking about many things, but some things weren't for mortal ears to hear. "I've really enjoyed your company tonight," she said quietly. "But I should get going. Dawn is coming and I should really head back to my hotel room."
"You could stay with me," he offered. "I promise I'll be the perfect gentleman."
The offer was beyond tempting. Throwing caution to the wind she stood with a smile. "If you promise to be a gentleman I can't refuse."
They arrived outside a large building in the warehouse district. As AJ unlocked a door, Nic raised a brow. "You live in a warehouse?" she asked skeptically.
He opened the door, and with a grin, gestured her inside. "Why not? Who's going to look for a vampire in a warehouse?" he asked.
Nic stepped through the door and looked around. His Dodge Viper and a Harley Fatboy were parked near the large bay door. Farther away a living area was set up with a couple of couches, a chair and a mini fridge. Stairs along one wall led up to a door, and underneath the stairs was another door. The layout was open and airy, with no windows to let in the sun. Not that vampires got claustrophobic.
They sat down on the couch, Nic on one end, a slender leg tucked under her, facing him. He sat on the other end, facing her. They each had a glass of blood wyne. While they sipped it, they talked about the many things that weren't appropriate in a public setting with prying mortal ears around.
"So what's really up with the shades?" she asked, reaching over to lightly tap them with her fingernail.
He shrugged. "Nothing really. Only if I really care about and trust someone do I let them see me without them. Eyes are the windows to the soul and all that. No other reason."
"I guess we all have our quirks, don't we?" she asked jokingly.
In response, he reached up and slowly pulled the sunglasses off. His eyes were closed, but a moment later he opened them and raised them to meet hers. Sky blue, so bright they looked almost out of place with his dark hair. Nic thought they were the most beautiful set of eyes she'd ever seen. She reached over and cupped his cheek, stroking her thumb across his cheekbone. "Thank you," she said softly.
He reached up and held her hand there for a moment before turning his face to press a kiss to her palm. "Dawn is coming. We should go to bed."
He led her up the stairs to what had once been an office. It now held a large bed, a dresser and a closet. Rummaging around in the dresser, AJ came up with a jersey that he tossed to Nic. "You can wear that if you want." He turned away from her and pulled off his t-shirt and then kicked off his boots.
Nic turned away from him and stripped before pulling the jersey over her head. It fell to her knees. She giggled softly as she turned around and climbed into the bed. She could feel the dawn starting to pull her down into the blackness of sleep. AJ, clad in just a pair of boxer briefs, climbed in next to her. He pressed a kiss to her forehead before pulling her against his chest. They both succumbed to the pressure of sleep as the sun rose above the horizon.
As Nic rolled over, she could tell something wasn't right. Very groggily she opened her eyes, a yawn escaping her lips, and peered at the other side of the bed. Wasn't someone supposed to be there? Her mind was foggy with the daytime, but a moment later she realized AJ wasn't there. She frowned and pushed herself up and looked around. He wasn't anywhere in the room.
She rolled slowly out of bed, looked longingly at it a moment and then walked to the door and stepped onto the landing outside it. There, in the shadows below, AJ stood, working out with a sword. She leaned against the railing and watched. "Do you always," she paused with a large yawn. "Always wake up in the middle of the afternoon?" she asked after a moment. "Because it's unnatural." She smiled tiredly.
He looked up at the railing and flashed her a grin. "Most days, yes."
"I see. So a beautiful woman in your bed can't even keep you there?"
"Mmmm I might be persuaded to come back to bed," he replied with a roguish grin and a wink.
"Well then get your ass up here. I'm going back to bed, with or without you," she said and turned around, walking back into the bedroom. She lay down and closed her eyes. She smiled as she drifted off to sleep, hearing him walk up the stairs and slip into the bed beside her.
xxx
7 years ago – Prague, Czech Republic
Nic stood on a bridge overlooking the river. A glance at her cell phone showed no texts or calls. She was irritated because the text she'd received told her to meet her associate here and now he was late. She leaned against the railing, her arms folded on top of it, looking across the river at the warehouse district.
"Finally," she muttered under her breath when she heard footsteps approaching. She turned around, about to give the man a verbal lashing when the words died in her throat. She cocked her head to the side and raised a brow. "AJ?" she said with a note of surprise in her voice.
He looked over at her. "Nico. What are you doing here?" he asked. He seemed as surprised as she was.
"I was supposed to meet an associate of mine. What are you doing here? I didn't even know you were in this country." Not that she kept tabs on him or anything.
"I got a text saying to meet a contact here." He stared at her a moment, taking her in.
"Maybe you'll have better luck than I have," she said, with a slight laugh.
"How have you been, Nic?" he asked.
She shrugged. "I've been alright I guess." Duane had died, AJ had been gone. How the hell should she feel?
"Is your... boyfriend here? Are you still seeing him?" AJ asked, though he looked as if it nearly killed him to ask.
"Duane?" she shook her head. "D died about six months ago." She shuddered, remembering the horrid circumstances and all the shit she'd been through since. He'd been the only one besides AJ himself that she had truly cared about.
AJ took a step closer to her. "I'm sorry, Nic. Really." He tentatively reached out to her, and when she offered no resistance, pulled her into the circle of his arms.
Nic looked up at him, her forehead not even reaching his chin. "Shit happens," she said flippantly. Only because he knew her better than any other person on earth, did he hear the undercurrent of grief there. "First loves are never forgotten," she said suddenly. She moved slightly and pulled up the sleeve of her jacket. The inside of her right wrist bore a tattoo of a rose.
His blue, blue eyes met hers. Slowly, as if it were a dramatic movie scene, his head lowered to hers. His lips touched hers lightly.
She melted into him. It was all the encouragement he needed. The kiss deepened, her arms winding around his neck. It was as if nothing had ever gone wrong between them. As if they hadn't been killing each other slowly for years. Suddenly, everything was right in the world again.
After minutes, hours? Nic wasn't sure how long, but he broke the kiss, then kissed her nose, her forehead and her lips once more. "I'm sorry," he whispered.
"For what?" she asked, confused.
"I didn't mean..." he shrugged.
Nic chuckled. "It always happens this way with us, doesn't it? Don't be sorry. Maybe I should be sorry. For everything."
AJ shook his head. "No, Nic, it's just the way it is between us."
She smirked. "Volatile and passionate."
And I meant every word I said. When I said that I love you I meant that I'd love you forever.
5 years ago – Virginia Islands
"You two are back together? Again?" Delilah arched a skeptical brow. "Haven't you two been down this road before?"
Nic glanced at AJ and shrugged. "I guess it's something only we will ever understand. No matter how hard I fight it, I always end up right back here. And it's always like coming home. Why keep fighting it?"
AJ sketched a cheeky grin. "Why not?" he asked. He was rewarded with a thump on the shoulder from Nic.
"I love you, you idiot. I have no idea why, but I do. No one will ever love you like I do."
He turned serious. "I love you too. There have been others, yes. But they were only placeholders in my heart for you Nic. It's always been you."
And I'm gonna keep on loving you. Cause it's the only thing I wanna do. I don't wanna sleep, I just wanna keep on loving you.
The man made her absolutely insane. He was the only one that could get under her skin like that. He was also the only one she would die for. He was the one she was absolutely, positively, truly in love with. There were bumps along the road. There probably always would be. AJ has a tendency to run his mouth at inopportune times. They both have a tendency to be headstrong and selfish, but then, what vampire doesn't? She thought back to the moonlit walk in the garden behind the Hilton.
6 years ago – Cleveland, Ohio
"It's been hell trying to get you alone. I wanted to talk to you about something," she said, almost nervously. She wasn't sure why. The man loved her. She knew it, but this... It seemed make or break.
"What's up, Nic?" He glanced at their clasped hands, hers clinging to his for dear life.
"I know this is silly... Maybe you won't care, but if you don't want me to..."
"Nic. Just tell me, doll."
She took a deep, unneeded breath. "I just wanted to let you know I was going to go back to using your last name. Full time. I'd like to be Nicollette Knight again."
She stopped walking and AJ was forced to stop as well. He looked at her, surprise evident in his eyes. "I didn't know you'd ever stopped using it."
"Yeah well... with everything that was going on..." she shrugged. "You don't mind?"
"Not at all."
She smiled and leaned in to kiss him. "I love you," she whispered against his lips.
"Always," he replied.
If you've made it this far, I thank you. I would appreciate any and all reviews. Thanks!