DisclaimerI don't own anything in the world of the Labyrinth, but it is true that the following thoughts are about a character that belongs to me, from a character that belongs to me, so yeah! LOL This chapter is for all of you who read chapter 16 of New Crystals, Old Dreams and wondered what it was that Jeaule wrote about in her diary that made her grow some backbone. If you don't know what I am talking about...I suggest checking out New Crystals, Old Dreams, its a good read!

The Diary of Jeaule Olincamp

I don't know if I want to be known as the quiet, demure sister of Erina any longer. At first it was fine, it kept people away and gave me time for my art and reading and writing my thoughts away in here. But now, I am starting to feel my isolation as a bad thing. It is wearing on me and I don't know how to break out of it.

I have asked myself what brought about this change of heart more times than I could sit here and write, more times than I would want to. Every time I come up with the same answer, though I, in my womanly modesty, try to play it off as a fancy from reading those ridiculous romance novels that Maesia seems insistent on forcing my way these days.

Why does my mind seem to persist that my attitude has changed because of a few stolen glances from Cyric of Dendum? Is it simply because my romance novel assaulted mind wants to believe that the handsome lord would fall in love with the beautiful handmaiden…if I were to call myself beautiful, I would call myself pretty at best, plain at worst.

Or is there a possibility that those few moments when our eyes met…he really did change something in me? Could those mere moments have changed me from the timid little field mouse that most think me into this budding woman that I want to become? All signs point to the fact that…oh gods…please don't tell me I am in love with him. That would be hopeless. Hopeless and foolish.

And yet, there is a part of me that would rejoice at the liberation. I would love to think myself beautiful and engaging enough to have caught the eye of someone so tempting to so many. In my mind I have already imagined what it would be like if this were so.

I have imagined things that make me blush as I write this, but they have given me a strange strength these last few days.

I would usually never even think of standing up to my sister, let alone actually doing it, but I find myself getting closer and closer to doing just that. I find my eyes rolling as she complains about Lady Sarah, find myself tuning her out. Most startlingly, I find myself WANTING to tell her off, wanting to tell her to just shut up and stop her whining.

And if I have Cyric of Dendum to thank for this change of heart, then by the gods, if I ever get a chance…I will thank him till his head spins. Oh, I can't even believe I just wrote that, now I will have to spell this diary closed as well as hide it from my sister.