Here's my commentary on the infamous Tara Gilesbie, My Immortal.

I have no idea how many brain cells I'll have left after this. So for the sake of me and my brain cells, read and review this. This is also my first Harry Potter fanfic.

We'll go through this together.

So *cue dramatic drumroll* I give you

Chapter 1.

AN: Special fangz (get it, coz Im goffik)'Goffik' My new name for my friends. 2 my gf (ew not in that way)I wasn't even thinking of that. But thank you for that image. raven, bloodytearz666 4 helpin me wif da story and spelling. U rok!I blame Raven for this. Justin ur da luv of my deprzzing life u rok 2! Justin Bieber? That would explain a lot of things MCR ROX! Meh

Hi my name is Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way and I have long ebony black hair (that's how I got my name) Thank you for clearing that up, I would have never known. with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee (AN: if u don't know who she is get da hell out of here!). Is it just me or am I sensing a Mary Sue? I'm not related to Gerard Way but I wish I was because he's a major fucking hottie. Yes, because incest is a lovely thing. I'm a vampire but my teeth are straight and white. Because that's not normal? I have pale white skin. I'm also a witch, So, she's a witch and a vampire? I am so jealous. and I go to a magic school called Hogwarts in England where I'm in the seventh year (I'm seventeen). I'm a goth (in case you couldn't tell) and I wear mostly black. I love Hot Topic and I buy all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, I don't care. pink fishnets Pink? and black combat boots. I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, Doesn't she have pale white skin? black eyeliner and red eye shadow. I was walking outside Hogwarts. It was snowing and raining Snowing and raining? What kind of fucked up weather do they have there? so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. Are you afraid that people would freak out when you sparkle? I know I am. A lot of preps stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them. The best way to deal with preps.

"Hey Ebony!" shouted a voice. I looked up. It was…. Draco Malfoy! Run while you still can!

"What's up Draco?" I asked.

"Nothing." he said shyly. Shyly? This is obviously some parallel universe.

But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away. That is the best sentence I have ever heard.

AN: IS it good? No PLZ tell me fangz! Sigh.

Chapter 1 and I already feel light headed, 44 more chapters to go.

I can't think properly now, just read and review while I go and stick my head down a drain.