*Just a small note: This story will begin at the start of mass effect 3 when you first run into Thane in the hospital. It will follow the BASIC story mass effect laid on but adding a lot onto it. I haven't decided on whether or not I will continue after Thane's death or not, but he will end up dying eventually yes. L Besides that, enjoy!*
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I walked into the hospital with the papers regarding Kaidan's hospitalization and glanced quickly around the room as I walked through. He should be around here somewhere, I was thinking to myself. I reached the bottom of the steps and looked down at the papers again.
"When was the last time I was here? It should be around here somewhere... Oh! I think it's through those doors!" I said out loud. I began to move forward again when something caught the corner of my eye and forced my footsteps into a harsh pause. Is that... I turned my body to the left. There's no damn way... My leg lifted itself and moved forward. It...
At a loss for words, I was practically running through the hospital to the man who stood by the window frame peering outside. "Thane!" I screamed, my desperate feet carrying me still. He turned ever so slowly and that moment felt like an eternity. I almost wished I had the memory of a drell so I could relieve the pure bliss that washed over me as I saw his face for the first time in what felt like centuries. I stopped just steps in front of him as he turned his whole body to face me and slowly reached his arm towards me.
"Thane..." I said softly, reaching my own arm to connect with his. "Thane, it's you..."
He pulled me with such force that I hit my head against his hard chest but I didn't care. His arms wrapped around me were enough for me. It was all I wanted all this time; all I needed.
"Siha... Siha, I heard Earth was under attack. I didn't know if you had made it out." His voice was firm as usual, but quieter. I looked up into his dark gaze and felt my heart beat harder than it did the first night we spent together. I could feel my throat getting tighter and prayed I wouldn't cry here. "Siha..." His voice broke into me. "Siha, I love you."
"Thane, It's been so long. I thought I would never get to see you again..." I couldn't form the questions that were running through my head. My hand clutched ever so slightly as I tried to calm myself. A solider like myself and I was acting like a child. It was embarrassing. His fingers grabbed my fist suddenly and I relaxed. Somehow he knew; he always knew.
"Siha, I'm sorry. I'll explain everything, just sit down." He said, guiding me slightly over to the two chairs that were nearby. "What are you doing here, Siha?"
"I- I'm visiting a friend, Kaidan, who got hurt protecting me." I responded, regaining myself.
"Ah, the human biotic in intensive care? I saw the markings of an implant." He leaned forward ever so slightly.
"Yeah, that's him."
"We have spoken. He was holding out hope that a woman would visit him... Is there something I should know about you two?"
"We..." I hesitated. I was seeing him again for the first time in however long and this is what he wants to speak of? "We were together once before the first Normandy was destroyed; before us."
"I see. Then you grew apart, I gather?" His gaze was strong. I nodded. "You have many enemies, Siha. They may come for him and try to finish him off here. I will look out for him."
"I appreciate that Thane." I stood from the chair and he rose as well.
"I am near the end of my life; it is a good time to be generous. I have only a few loved left and you are my last. I will do what I can for you." Usually his voice was soothing to me but his words kept piercing into me. I wanted it to stop. I turned towards him and kissed him. He was taken aback at first but his lips slowly formed around mine and his hands rested on my waist. I pulled back again and he smiled. "I see you want to make up for lost time. I should warn you that you may not want your last memories of me to be in this hospital. Kerpral's syndrome is... not kind."
He turned away from me and took his seat again so I followed. "Will you join me again, Thane; on the Normandy? It'll be just like old times. I could use your help..." I knew the answer.
"I would not be as I was before. My disease has worsened and I need daily medical attention. And if I know you, you will want to fight the reapers somehow." He seemed saddened.
"But what about Dr. Chakwas? Can't she take care of you?" I was just desperate.
"I'm sorry Siha, but my condition will not be manageable by your ship's medical center anymore. It would take up to much of her time and it would not be sufficient."
"Then we can find you lighter work. You don't need to be wrestling krogan and break their necks everyday..."
"Shepard, I am at peace with what I have done with my life. There comes at time when one must rest from war and conflict. It is not your time, but it is mine..." I could feel my heart flinch and I knew I couldn't force him to join, no matter how much I wanted to be by his side.
"Are you in a lot of pain?" I mumbled.
"At times. The oxygen transfer proteins don't form correctly; your human equivalent would be hemoglobin. As a result, my blood is low in oxygen. No matter how much I breathe in I get tingling, numbness – And that is the best of it. As for my brain. I cannot track the damage. I just experience dizziness from time to time." He reached his arm out to grab mine as if he knew what my next question was and the pain it caused me to ask it.
"Do you know how much time you have left?
"...I've been to several doctors. My favorite gave me three months to live – Nine months ago. It is freeing to find no requirements placed on me; no responsibilities, no fears. It is a good end to a life." He truly seemed to be at peace. He looked at me and seemed worried so I smiled at him slightly as reassurance. It hurt me to think of losing him, but I had known it all along. I had been preparing since the beginning. I should have just been glad that he'd been with me for this long and that I was finally by his side again. I should have just been happy...
"I've been trying to find you..." I couldn't stop myself from saying it. He looked taken back.
"I had to remove the traces. The people at this hospital know me under another name. I'm sorry, Shepard. I sent letters while you were incarcerated but I suppose they never made it past the guards." His grip on my hand tightened. I was at a loss for words and the meeting was too bittersweet. I gently pulled my hand from his and stood up, facing the window. I watched his reflection as he stood as well and came up behind me.
"I'm glad I could see you again, Siha. I apologize." His arms wrapped around my waist as I forgot everything around us.
"Thane... I have some time, could we spend some time together?" I wanted to stay with him.
"I'd like that," He smiled. "But I should warn you that my cardiovascular system is not what it used to be. I cannot..."
I cut him off with a kiss as I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him as close as physically possible. His strong arms against my waist made me feel as if I could never fall. He pushed me up against the window and his arm traced down to my thigh, pulling it up as I wrapped it around him.
"Siha, let us go somewhere more private." He backed off and began to lead me towards the door. All I could think of was the feeling of his skin on mine and I was going crazy. I wanted to be with him more than I had wanted anything in my life.
"Siha, I love you so much..." His voice strung through me as he laid me down on the bed and climbed on top of me. I put my one arm around his neck as he placed his hand in my other.
"Thane, please. I love you... I love you..." I felt my throat tighten again as he kissed me passionately. His tongue rough texture that I would probably never get used to, but it drove me wild. I pulled his head closer towards mine as I rose up slightly; nibbling down on it to tell him I wanted more.
"Siha... Remember what Mordin told you about prolonged oral exposure to drell? And what about your body? Are you sure this is okay for you?" He looked worried as he pulled away.
"The critically ill man is going to worry about my body? Besides, would you be okay with stopping now?" I sat up and placed my hand on his chest, pushing him down and climbing on top of him. I unzipped my jacket and threw it on the floor beside us. He smiled up at me and let out a small chuckle.
"Perhaps you're right." His hand crept underneath my shirt and rose higher. He fidgeted slightly with my bra as I kissed his chest. "Siha, I'm sorry but I can't get this off still."
"The assassin has a weakness." I giggled, taking it off for him underneath my tank top. He helped me pull it off and then tossed it aside, sitting up and kissing me again. His one hand controlled my waist as his other touched my breast. I let out a small moan as his finger tips played with my nipple. He smiled as he removed his own clothing.
"I'm glad that I saw you again Siha. I'm... so glad." He flipped me over once more and traced his tongue down to my breast. His teeth bit down ever so slightly and I could feel his tongue rub against me as his other hands played with my body.
"Ah! Thane! Oh, please..." I couldn't contain the excitement and pleasure. I sat upright again and stole my third kiss of the day. His tongue played within my mouth as he still remembered my pleasure points. He slowly kissed me down to the area between my neck and shoulder, kissing me ever so gently and sending a rush through my body. I let out a moan and tried to push him over but his hands wouldn't let me remember anything past the pleasure. He noticed my hand on his chest and pulled my body on top of his again. His hand on my waist roughly grabbed a hold of me as he entered me. "Thane! Ahh!"
We spent hours in that room together making up for all the lost time.
I struggled to regain my breath as I looked over at Thane, who was having an even harder time.
I got up and grabbed some water and ran back to him. Reality hit me again and I remembered his condition. "Thane, are you okay? I'm sorry, I shouldn't have pushed you! Should we get a doctor?" I was frantic as I realized that the water probably wouldn't help it anyways.
"Siha..." He gasped for air, "Siha... I'm okay." He looked up at me and for the first time in my life I was felt lost. I didn't know how to help him nor what to do.
"Siha, I promise you... I'm okay... Just lay with me... like we used to..." He smiled at me as much as he could manage and grabbed my hand. I nodded and he tugged me toward the bed, so I sat down and wrapped my arm around him. He laid down and it seemed like it helped because he breathing started becoming regular again. I laid down beside him and gave him a small kiss on the check as he closed his eyes with a smile. Although we would often fall asleep with each other like this I couldn't close my eyes. I watched as his chest moved slowly up and down and counted the times the breath passed his lips. For the first time in my life, I was scared of losing someone. All the others who had died – my parents when I was young, my squad on Torfan, Ashley on Ilos, everyone who went down with the Normandy – none of their deaths could have prepared me for this feeling I got when I thought of losing Thane. I wasn't a religious person all my life but I found myself wanting to pray. I wanted more than anything to know that he wouldn't disappear completely when he died. I knew I was just trying to comfort myself but I didn't mind the lie as long as it meant something to think of when he left. Some hope that I would one day see him again. Thane had told me about the drell religion before and I recalled him saying something about a sea. I should ask him when he wakes up... I thought. If there is a lord, a maker, a goddess or whatever – I wonder, haven't I given up enough already?