It's been awhile since I wrote anything for this show. Just a nice, short piece. Also, I don't own the show or the characters.
This wasn't how it was supposed to be. She wasn't supposed to be here alone, but she was. Sara Sidle walked through the solitary rooms of the apartment she now called home. Empty, everything was so empty and bare. But not as vacant and cold as her heart. As she stared outside the window, she began to remember. The day she had left CSI was still burned into her memory. Weeks, months, then even years had passed. Life had changed. She had changed. Nothing was what she had expected. When she left Las Vegas, she just didn't leave behind her work, but also her friends, her family. The group of people who had seen her worst sides, but still continued to care about her day after day.
The past that had haunted her for so long, was finally being laid to rest. She was ready to move on. The thought of returning to her former life was still there in the back of her mind, yet it seemed pointless. Too much had changed. There was no way to return. As much as she wanted to, it was probably best to stay away from Las Vegas. Their lives had surely changed, and she didn't want to disturb their routines. Her mind wandered down the paths of memories. She remembered…everything. From the first day on the job to the day when she had written that note. The note telling Grissom good-bye. Of all the painful memories in her life, that one hurt the most. Never had she felt anything that hurt as much as leaving him behind. She had told herself it was for the best. He deserved the best, and she had been on the edge of a complete breakdown. And yet, after all this time, she still thought about him. Still wondered whether he was still working on cases. He probably was, since he wasn't the type to give up on a job. No, that's what she like about him. His curiosity, tenacity and whimsical yet random personality was what had attracted her first. Grissom had been her idol from the first day she met him while working in San Fransisco as a young student. Their relationship had been the highlight of her life, the one thing that kept her sane. But as time passed, even that wasn't enough. And she couldn't go back.
The other CSIs were also a part of her "family." Initially, she had kept an aloof profile as a matter of habit, but eventually they had become intertwined into her life as securely as if they had been there all along. She missed the friendly banter and easy rapport they had all shared. At first, she and Catherine had been slightly distrusting, but soon had come to a friendship. She, Nick, and Warrick had a friendly underlying competition going over cases, but she knew they always had her back. She knew that Greg had a crush on her for awhile, but she also knew he had a crush on every girl that came along. She missed them still. Even though time had passed, she still thought fondly of them. Their faces were permanently etched in her mind. A continual reminder of what had been. Of what she had given up. Maybe someday, in the future, when things were different, she could go back. There was still time. Time that was rapidly slipping away from her. But that couldn't be helped. It was too late now. No matter what people say, you can't always go home. So here she was, still living the life that had chosen her. Alone and lonely. Yet, although there was no way for her to turn back time, there was still hope. And she could handle not being able to see them again, with the assurance that whatever happened, when it came to the end of time, they would all be there together. At the end of forever. And for now, that was enough.
So, I was in an interesting mood as I wrote this. Hope you enjoyed reading this!