The Fixer
The Self-Centered, Lying, Cheating Bastard
One band of the window shades sat off of its track, lifting it just enough to look inside without being detected. Fighter jet engines hummed high overhead through the clouds, echoing long and loud across the flat land. It was the first time in who knows how long that Bucky had seen the stars. It was hard to remember how many there really were. Out here in the woods it was dark enough to see the Milky Way clearly; unlike the endless lights of D.C.
The Winter Soldier, or, James "Bucky" Barnes, as he preferred to be called these days, had been traveling for months. Eleven months, actually, as he trekked across the eastern seaboard, searching.
Memories from his life trickled in slowly, like an icy cold finger on the back of his neck reminding him that there was still so much missing. It came as a painful shock when he stared feeling again. It hurt. He didn't understand what was happening. The first time he felt 'upset' was when he saw Steve drop from that falling hover craft into the dark water below. But after that, after reading anything he could find on that name, "Bucky Barnes", it started coming back. It started so slowly, then, all at once it consumed him like an avalanche.
It happened three weeks ago while he was sitting on a train through Charleston, Virginia. It reminded him of another time, on another train. When his best friend saved his life by busting up a bay door and knocking that Hydra scum around like a ten cent hooker. The pain that followed the memory shocked him. Guilt covered him like a heavy clay cast wherever he went. That feeling was what prompted him to do what he did.
Although Bucky knew he was widely behind the times, he was beginning to understand the purpose of computers. He managed to get a copy of the list. How he came across it wasn't of consequence, and not nearly as important as what it contained. A list of Hydra members trained by S.H.E.I.L.D. That soft, folded sheet of paper is what brought him here to begin with.
The only sign of life for two miles on either side was the dim light emanating from this little white house. Inside, a woman sat on a beige leather couch watching a strange, flat, flashing screen, looking like a zombie from the old pictures. Her mouth hung open slightly, a white plate of charred meat sat half eaten on a glass coffee table. A large black dog stared at the plate like it was all that mattered in life. The animal eased closer, gaining the woman's attention. She scowled at it before placing her hand under it's jaw, bringing it's glossy wet nose to hers.
"Leave my burger alone you annoying little nugget." She feigned anger, then kissed the black nose. She looked at the dog for another minute before shaking her head slowly. Cutting the black patty with a fork she let the dog snatch it away before running to the corner with its prize. A smile emerged on her lips as shhe looked at the dog. "Pete is gonna kill me when he gets back. I spoil you."
Bucky was waiting for a sign of some kind. Proof that the person he searched for really resided here, that this wasn't a false identity to throw people off. He thought about just breaking in, killing her and her dog, and tearing the place apart until he found what he needed. That's what he would have done back when… Bucky squeezed his eyes shut at the thought, pressing the memory back into some dark crevice. At this point, the last thing he needed was to draw even more attention to himself. So many people were already hunting him, it didn't make sense to raise any unnecessary red flags.
This was the address belonging to the name on the sheet folded in his pocket, Peter A. Forscythe. The chemical engineer who developed the drugs that wiped his memory and had a hand in ruining his life. Bucky planned to hunt and kill every last one of the people on that list. Too bad this was far easier said than done with no access to the intel he had before.
The full list of traitor was released shortly after... something. It was hard to remember. Everything was still hazy from time to time, fading in and out. One day he'd remember every moment clearly as crystal. The next, he'd be a wild man with no purpose. He was a living anachronism. Certain things made perfect sense while others were frighteningly confusing. Like paying $3.50 for a coffee.
"Hey handsome! What's up?" A light voice floated through the window with a note of excitement. Bucky's eyes flicked back to the dimly scene in front of him. "Another month?" Her brow shifted irritably. "Oh. Okay. Yeah, I get it. No, I'm not mad I'm just- yeah. Okay, I'll make sure it gets sent out." The dog reappeared, sitting before the woman, awaiting a new piece of meat. "Go away you annoying little shi- Wha- no, not you, the dog. Jade is super needy today. She misses you. One sec my service is breaking up."
The woman held her phone out to look at the screen, sliding her fingertip across the screen and typing expertly. Her eyes widened a fraction as her expression suddenly sharpened. She threw the phone back to her ear.
"Wanna explain why your phone says you're on base?" Even the stranger outside could hear the silent answer on the other end. The woman sat bolt straight, eyes wide, mouth agape with horrified realization. "-shut up! I don't want to hear it. Oh? Your phone is lying? What the Hell do you take me for? Now, I'm giving you one chance. Where are you, really. No bullshit."
Bucky's dark eyes rolled. He didn't come here for drama. He didn't quite understand how a phone could identify someone's location. Perhaps her phone could trace Forcsythe?
"-Uh-huh. Classified, sure. -Let me ask you this, are you high?" She stood abruptly, pushing her dog out of the way, pacing rapidly about the small room with one arm folded around her midsection to hold up a full length blue robe. "You are a crew chief for tankers, not some freaking secret squirrel, why would I believe for one sec-?" Her face dropped like a cannon ball. "Is that Shelby? Is that Shelby's voice?! So help me God of you're with her again I will find you and-" Her voice hitched a sob and one hand flew to her lips. "What do you mean? It's not-" She eased back to the couch cushions softly. "Just, please, tell me where you are. It's been eight months. I've been waiting here for eight damn months. I've been to your office-" Silence. Furrowed brows. "Yes, is that a problem? No, I did not pick up your stupid CAC card." Her pupils dilated, implying fear. "Why don't you have your CAC?" More silence lingered for what felt like a long time. Her voice lowered almost inaudibly. "I see."
After thirty seconds, her hands drifted slowly to her lap, eyes transfixed on the opposite wall. The phone's screen went black. Jade jumped up next to the woman, lowering her head to her lap. A mindless hand palpated the animal's short fur quietly.
"Daddy isn't coming home, babe." She muttered quietly, brokenly. The dog whined, looking up at her master with large golden eyes. "He's too busy screwing some boomer in another country."
The man standing outside narrowed his eyes. She knew his location. This would be a synch. There were a number of options. One was to simply break in, and torture the information out of her. But that was the Winter Soldier's gig. Another, far more Bucky-ish plan, was to just knock on the front door.
The sad smile on her visibly paled face was promising when she pulled the screen door open. Fear and emotional upheaval made people vulnerable. It would be less than an hour before she gave away every bit of information he needed. Bucky lowered the brim of his hat to block his eyes, hoping she wouldn't recognize him from the news.
"What can I do for you?" She asked, voice tense. He got the feeling that she didn't want to see anyone right now, which made her the perfect target.
Blue eyes were barely visible under the shadow of night. The man at her front door was massive, substantially taller and broader than her 6' husband. The hand she held against the wall made her appear to be propping herself up when really she was clutching the butt of her loaded 40OT6, a pump action shotgun. This wasn't the first time she had someone come bother her at night. She tried calling the cops once but their only advice was to shoot the next one so they "wouldn't haveta deal with them hoodlums no more".
God she hated North Carolina.
The only reason she lived here was because of Pete's base assignment. She moved here with everything she owned a few years ago. Though most of her life was in New Jersey, she had to learn to live a little slower here. Being so far from NYC was hard at first, but she got over it when she found out that bonfires and shooting ranges could be as much fun as exciting bars and Central Park. Her stomach plummeted leaving a cold trail all the way down. It hadn't hit her how much her life revolved around her husband until the moment she hung up that phone.
A sheepish laugh came from the doorway, it wrenched her back to reality.
"Sorry, but I can't for the life of me figure out how to get back to the highway. Could you point me in the right direction?" The man at her door asked with a lopsided, boyish grin.
The woman appeared shocked with thin, elevated brows. "Oh! Uhm." She relaxed, leaning her shoulder to the door frame, lifting one hand loftily she pointed over his left shoulder. He pretended to glance wherever she pointed then looked back at her for further instruction. He also pretended not to notice the large gun next to the door.
"I know it's super dark, but if you take this road all the way to the end." She faltered, pursing her lips and rolling her eyes. "I know, it's just my driveway but you know what I mean." A lame smile overtook her embarrassment, shaking her head a little. "Make a right out of the driveway and take that road all the way to Old Grantham and make a left again. At the end of that, there will be a pretty confusing intersection. Make sure you stay to the right or you will be hopelessly lost forever." She pulled back the hand to move a bit of blonde hair behind her ear, looking up into his eyes to make sure what she said made sense.
Her lip suddenly quivered uncontrollably when she realized that she might only drive that route one more time. When she packed everything and moved far, far away. How the Hell was she going to sell this house? They only signed the mortgage two months ago...
The man's furrowed eyebrows fell lower, blue eyes focused on something on her face. "Are you okay?"
She went to nod but her lips and throat went taut, flaring her nostrils slightly to hold back the tears, effectively transforming her nod into a twitch. "I'm good, sorry."
His head tilted, only a little, as his eyes searched her face gently. "You look hurt."
She felt her weakened heart seize painfully. Yes, someone did hurt her. Her eyes remained steady on his. Concern was written all over this stranger's face. Why was it that she couldn't even remember the last time Pete looked at her like that?
"Yeah, I'm okay. My husband is a lying, cheating piece of garbage." She forced a smile that didn't touch her eyes. She cleared her throat to indicate an abrupt change of subject. "Is that all you needed?"
The man's expression was soft with a simple smile. "I hate to ask, but could you write those instructions for me? My memory isn't the greatest." It wasn't a total lie.
"Sure, just hold on a minute while I find a pen."
When she left the doorway, Jade, the big black dog, took her owner's place, tail wagging long and slow with bright eyes. Bucky scratched her head and the dog angled so he'd hit the right spot. The animal was pretty big, almost as tall as his hip.
The blonde woman returned, eyes puffy, with a pen in hand. She reached for Bucky's left hand. Instinctively, he jerked away from the brief contact. The woman eyed him nervously. His eyes darted to the bushes next to the door as he explained quickly, "I'm an amputee. It's not real."
Her lips parted apologetically, but she couldn't seem to get the words out. Her cheeks burned red and she tried not to look at his hidden arm. "Sorry, I don't have any paper so I was gonna write it on your hand, but if your don't want me to it's okay. I'm so sorry, I didn't know."
"'S okay. Here," he took the pen from her hand with a wink and pulled out the list of names, folding and flipping it so she wouldn't see what was written. Using the door as a flat surface to write, he smiled, pen poised and ready. "So I follow this road to the end..."
...
The night air was brisk and dry for August in the south. It amazed the blonde that she was laughing at a time like this. It was like this guy dropped out of the sky specifically to make her feel better. They bantered back and forth about all kinds of things. Mostly about Jade and how she couldn't seem to get enough of the stranger's pants, or his awesome prosthetic arm. The dog was excited to be around someone other than just Katie for once. It was weird, Jade was a growling monster most of the time, it was the reason she got the dog to begin with. The big dog nudged his left hand demandingly until he let her rest her head on his knee. Jade's owner was laughingly mortified.
"I'm Bucky by the way." Bucky smiled winningly at the woman as she recovered from a laughing fit over the arm of her blue camping chair.
"I'm Katie, it's really good to meet you." She shook her head slowly in disbelief, her words punctuated by short bursts of laughter. "I haven't laughed like this in too long."
"Because of the cheating, lying son of a bitch?" Bucky asked, raising an eyebrow. Katie grinned, but her eyes were hard and guarded. "I don't know where these military guys get off treating their wives like that." He added truthfully. "They drag you all over creation then do something like that. It's shameful."
The grin slipped from her face. He'd spoken too candidly.
Both were seated on camp chairs on the back porch where the sky was lit up like a Christmas tree. Katie was staring intently at the stars. The corners of her lips tugged down, deep in thought. They had been shooting the breeze for hours. Bucky wasn't completely sure when he knocked on her door, but he suspected it was close to nine. Judging by the moon's position now, it was getting closer to four in the morning. He was surprised Katie wasn't tired yet. Her eyes weren't drooping, she wasn't yawning. She just gazed up at the stars, long neck arched, hair drooping from its bun down her back. She had a very flat jaw and straight nose that made for a pretty profile even under such dim light.
Bucky internally kicked himself. He tried not to think about her like that, but it was difficult. He hadn't had the chance to talk up a pretty girl for the good part of a century. Not to mention that Katie was not just married, but married to a man Bucky had to kill. And to get to him, he had to change the topic. "Have you been stationed here long?"
That fixated gaze didn't move from the dark sky. "Yeah, three years. Before that, New York for four."
He whistled. "How long were you together?"
"Married since I was eighteen and stupid. Now, seven years later, I'm still a total idiot." Her lips tightened to a line, her chin crumpled slightly.
"You're not an idiot, he's the idiot." He couldn't stop himself from saying, again, mentally kicking himself. It was in his nature to keep a woman from crying. Tears were confounding to him. Even when he was close to crying, himself, he would joke around until he forced a smile.
Katie's expression fell just enough to become totally vulnerable as she hummed in agreement. Bucky didn't know how to make light of this particular situation so he pressed on with his subtle interrogation. "Did that idiot have the stones to tell you where he is?"
Her mouth opened, then closed. Her mind rolled. He could see her calculating something as her eyes stared into the endless sky. "He's screwing his coworker somewhere in the Middle East. He said Qatar, but then he said it was classified. Then he said Cali. Then, just before I hung up on him, I heard his little whore say a flight number. I looked it up on my phone and it doesn't exist for any major airline." She shook her head violently, giggling manically. "Wow, I must sound totally crazy."
Crazy? No. But Bucky was definitely disappointed.
Bucky's target was in either California or Qatar. That was a massive expanse of space to search and Bucky didn't have the time or manpower.
Bucky jerked away from a "touch" that he felt to his left arm. He looked at Katie, whose hand retreated quickly and lingered in the air between them.
"Sorry, I forgot." Her eyes trailed the line of his long sleeved sweatshirt. "Does it hurt?" Her face shaded white. "Sorry, too personal. Wow, what's wrong with me today."
Bucky felt his lips pull into a smile. No one had ever asked him that before. He never really thought about it, either. Yes, it did hurt. Like electric pressure that couldn't be released along the seam. Sometimes, if it was bad enough, it would run down the center of his metal arm as if burning a bone that wasn't there. It didn't hurt enough to bother him, but it was enough to get his attention.
"Yeah, sometimes."
"Oh, that's terrible. I'm actually a psych nurse at a hospital out in Raleigh. We used to work with a lot of amputees with PTSD." Bucky's eyes brow rose at the term. Her head angled sharply, if it was possible to turn your head sarcastically, she just did. "You do know what PTSD is, right?" Bucky shrugged a little. Katie tried not to giggle but it didn't work. "It's 'post traumatic stress disorder'. It's diagnosed in people who experienced something terrible, like rape victims and military veterans."
The term used to be called 'shell shock'. He remembered the distant look in his friends' eyes when they would come home just before he joined the Army himself. Bucky also knew that he should be looking for a way to excuse himself and leave at this point. He knew it was the smart thing to do. But the longer he spoke with Katie, the more he wanted to just stay and listen to her talk. It was nice to converse with someone who didn't think he was a monster. Someone who didn't want to see him captured and locked away. It was even better to talk to a pretty girl who didn't like to watch the news.
From what Bucky heard so far, he knew that Katie Forscythe was once a First Lieutenant in the Air Force, but she was given a medical discharge when she was diagnosed with a condition that she didn't divulge. She was married at eighteen and would be divorced before twenty-six. Her parents were wealthy CEO and CFO's of a pharmaceutical company and she had two brothers that she hadn't seen in three years. One was 32, the other was 24.
"So where were you headed before you ended up in this God forsaken place?" A smiling voice asked, pulling Bucky from his thoughts.
"Nowhere in particular, just somewhere to rest my head until morning." He said numbly as he watched the vast sky above. The sky was so incomprehensibly huge out here, it felt as if it could swallow him up at any moment.
Looking at the sad looking man who stared up at the stars, Katie's heart was torn. She wanted to ask him to stay. Even if it was selfish, she wanted to have someone to talk to. Someone to keep her mind off of reality, just for a little while. There were two extra bedrooms in the house, so he would certainly have somewhere to sleep.
She fostered kids with Pete before, and how different was it to take in a full grown adult?
NO! That's totally insane. She just met this guy! He could be a psycho killer, or wanted by the mob, or something.
But, he couldn't be. He was the trifecta. No one was this hot, smart and fully sane. Usually you could only pick two of the three. Pete was hot and smart, but nowhere in the vicinity of sane. Bucky, even with his unkempt long hair and untrimmed beard, was what she considered 'too good to be real'. There just had to be something wrong with him.
"What exactly do you do?" She asked tentatively, hoping it wouldn't come off as insulting. She just had to know.
"Retired Army." He lifted his left shoulder poignantly with a cockeyed smile that grew as her eyes widened. "I travel on disability checks."
There was a resounding pang of guilt that hit him in the gut when those green eyes widened ever so slightly. Guilt because he didn't want to lie. His mother always told him that lying was a sin, not that he grew up religious, but it felt wrong to take advantage of someone so defenseless. The lie was awful, too. Just because he was an amputee it didn't make him disabled. He hated to call that luck, but in a lot of ways he was lucky. The worst part was how easily she believed every word.
"That's awful. Shouldn't the VA take care of you? It should be their obligation." Katie's face drooped. "It's sick that they can just kick you to the side like that."
Katie shook her head in heartfelt disbelief. Even though he wasn't looking at her, he could feel her eyes on the side of his face. He could almost hear her thinking.
And she was. She was thinking of all the times she refused to try something new because Pete told her not to. She was thinking of all the roller coasters she never rode and the SCUBA certification she never completed. She was thinking of the time she wanted to go skydiving and Pete flat out told her "no" because he thought it was too dangerous. And now, watching Bucky, a war veteran with an amputation, as he sat there peacefully watching the sky, she felt herself leaning toward "no" just because it was her first reaction to anything 'dangerous'. She had military training, she knew how to handle a gun. If he turned out to be insane, she would kill him.
With the sound of her lying husband's voice still in her ear, she knew she needed to break this pattern of compliance.
"You know what? Screw it." She said loftily. "I have two extra bedrooms if you need somewhere to go tonight. I'd hate for you to waste all that gas money to find some gross motel in Goldsboro at this time of night. This town isn't exactly the safest."
Bucky smiled. It was funny that she thought he needed her protection when she was the one married to a psychopath. It was a strangely welcomed change of pace.
"That would be great." He heard himself say before he could really think about the consequences. "I'll pay you with tinfoil eggs and pancakes if you want." He wiggled an eyebrow. "My troops said they were the best they ever had."
Katie had to bite her lower lip with her front teeth to keep from laughing, exposing one crooked tooth on the top row. She rolled her eyes, shaking her head. This was just ridiculous. "You don't need to do that. Plus, you are just a shameless stand in for Jade's deadbeat dad."
"Ouch." Bucky hissed as he gently pulled at one of Jade's long ears. All he could see were those gold eyes as she looked up at him adoringly.
Katie lifted her body from the slouchy chair and scratched the top of Jade's head as she passed Bucky. "Come on, I'll show you around. Tonight's rent is on me, but any longer and I'm charging."
Through the sliding glass of the back door they entered a dining room with a kitchen to the right. It had a jutting island that broke the room in half. Walking through the dining room there was an open wall that lead to a sizable living room with the tan couch from before. There was a flat screen TV in the corner and a large glass coffee table sat between them. To the left was a short hallway.
The room on the left was Katie's, she didn't even open the door for him to look inside as not to give any ideas. Across the hall from hers was a small, pale yellow room. Directly to the left was a room filled with a drum set and three guitars, a purple flower patterned chair, and a pull out couch. Katie informed him that she and her husband had a bunch of guests who would come to visit so they always needed enough beds.
Bucky chose the room across from hers. Not that he expected anything bad to happen, but if it did, he would be close enough to help. Bucky was never a cheater, mainly because he never told any one girl that he was steady with them. But he assumed a guy might be mad that he was caught. If that guy showed up at some point, Bucky would become his worst nightmare.
It wasn't a terrible idea.
This was his first lead since starting this journey a little under a year ago. If he could convince Katie to get her husband to the house he could force the other locations out of him. It wasn't a bad idea at all. Now he would just have to convince her to let him stick around for a little while longer.