Take Me Out
As much as Mindy loves receiving gifts (carefully selected from her wishlist written in curly purple font, stuck to the fridge with a magnet), he thinks she must love giving them equally. Every gift he has ever received from her has been deeply personal, touching and perfect for the occasion to a T. And they have been together long enough at this point, for him to recognize when she's about to give one.
Mindy has a long litany of excitements, as diverse, colorful and ridiculous as her wardrobe. There's the 'my patient just gave birth to the cutest baby ever' kind, the 'wow, I am so down for you right now' kind (he's particularly fond of this one) and among them is the gift-giving kind. All of these are very distinct.
So when one morning they leave the apartment separately and Mindy comes in to the practice later than usual, wearing her excitement like a 'the end is nigh!' sign, he is vaguely suspicious and extremely excited.
"Hey babe," Mindy sang as she walked through the double doors. She circled the desk, threw her arms around his neck dramatically and soundly kissed his lips. Powerless to do anything less, he pressed the tips of his fingers into the small of her spine- bringing her closer -and enthusiastically pressed her back into a dip.
"Oh get a room you two crazy Cuddle Fishes," Morgan flailed an arm at them with a big stupid grin on his face. Honestly, Morgan was their marriage's biggest fan. Besides them (Danny desperately hoped).
"It's Cuttlefish," Danny corrected immediately, pulling his lips back with a quiet smack.
"What?"
"With Ts."
"Well that's not really romantic." Commented Morgan in an accusatory and disappointed tone, as if Danny had been the one comparing his wife to a deep sea invertebrate.
"Neither are their mating habits. Vultures or termites would have been better; they mate for life you know."
At Morgan's blank look and Mindy's disgusted one, he shut up.
"You are such a nerd, Caste-lame-o. No more Discovery Channel for you."
"Yeah yeah." Danny slipped an arm around her shoulders and walked her to her office and away from Morgan's imminent post-googling existential crisis. "Wanna buddy up with me for a twins delivery later?"
"Definitely. We are like a baby delivering superhero tag team, high five!"
He did, although slightly less enthusiastically. Mostly because Betsy was watching with fascination and seemed to be taking notes.
They ate lunch at his desk and wiled away the time lightly teasing each other and playing footsie.
"So is there a reason Betsy's watching me like a hawk?"
"Way to be self-centered Danny, she's watching uslike a hawk."
"Uh. Why."
Mindy rolled her big brown eyes and gave him a flat look, as if he was just supposed to psychically know these things. "Because Babe! We are like, the perfect couple. We're awesome. And Betsy just wants an example to live by."
"That's stupid."
"Are you calling our love stupid?" his lovely wife cried dramatically.
"Yes Min, that is exactly what I'm saying."
She huffed, "And to think I got you something awesome. Maybe I should just give them away."
Danny took her hand and stroked it with his thumb in a placating gesture. "Don't be like that honey. Come on, you know I didn't mean it."
"Uh huh, whatever," said Mindy. "Are you sure you don't want to apologize? 'Cause it's a really awesome gift and you're gonna be so sorry."
Danny rolled his eyes. She was just being difficult for the sake of it, but like the shmuck he was, he knew exactly how this played out. "I'm sorry Mindy, for dismissing our timeless love. We good?"
Her face split into a huge grin, the way it always did without fail, every time he told her he loved her. It was so adorable he couldn't help but lean in and kiss her rosy cheek.
"So what's the surprise?
With great aplomb she whipped out a pair of tickets from her purse and grandly smacked them down on the desk. "Whabam! Am I good or am I good?"
"These are Yankees tickets. Really really good Yankees tickets. How did you get these?!"
Mindy grinned again, "One of the players' wives is one of my patients."
"Which one?"
She pursed her lips. "I don't know. The Mexican one?"
"Mindy, are you assuming because he plays baseball or are they actually?" He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "You know what? I don't care. These are great. Thanks honey." He kissed her cheek again. "Let me just call Stevie, it'll just be a sec."
"Wait no!"
"What?"
She sucked on her bottom lip nervously and looked off to the right. "I was thinking that I could go with you," she said while twirling a lock of hair around her finger.
"You want to go to the game?"
"I just said I did, didn't I! What? You don't want to bring your stunningly beautiful and highly successful wife out in public? I get it, it's fine. I'm hideous, you should just lock me away in the apartment and-"
Danny rolled his eyes skyward again and let out a great and audible sigh. "You know that what you said was completely contradictory right? I wanna go, let's go. It'll be fun. Lots of snacks."
"Mmmm pretzels."
Aaaaaand he lost her to daydreams of corn dogs and giant sodas.
It's late in the season, it's an important game and Mindy has spent the first 3 full innings on a food run. The only reason he hasn't already sent out a search party is because the score is so tight and it's still anyone's game; plus the pitcher's been on a hot streak.
She finally returns, laden down with two soft pretzels, four corn dogs, a huge bag of popcorn, two giant cups of soda and a plastic bag with the Yank's logo on it. She shoved most of it into his lap before going to down on both Pretzels.
"Very ladylike," he commented, butting shoulders with her.
"My darling husband, light of my life, keeper of my heart. If you wanted food you should have said so."
"Wait, none of it is for me?"
"That reminds me!" shouted Mindy suddenly, over the sound of the crowd cheering a bunt that loaded the bases. "I bought you some stuff at the souvenir place while I was getting food!" What had reminded her of this he wasn't sure but she was being kind of distracting at a very inopportune time.
From out of the bag she whipped a small blue cap with the NY logo stitched onto the front in white. With a flourish she placed it on his head.
Down on the diamond the coach had called time out so she now had his undivided attention.
Sixpence None the Richer played loudly in the background.
Danny laughed and took the cap off his head. "This is tiny, it's meant for a kid."
"Oh," she said with a faux frown, clearly masking her laughter. "It was cheaper."
"Yeah, 'cause it's made for a tiny head Min. If you have the receipt we can return it after."
"Don't worry, I bought two." She put another one on his head, this one big enough to accommodate an adult cranium. "Lookin' good babe." She winked, "and hey, smile for the cameras."
On the screen below the scoreboard was the kiss cam border superimposed around whom, but them.
It took him a moment to notice something very significant.
The hat on his head. 'Future Dad'. His head was spinning. He whipped around toface Mindy who was nodding so vigorously and smiling so big he thought she must have been giving herself whiplash.
"Seriously?!" shouted Danny above the cacophony of cheers.
"Ya!" she giggled as she was swept up into her husband's arms and squeezed tightly.
"I love you," he shouted with the cutest, most earnest expression on his face.
"Good!" she shouted back, "Now kiss your babymama Castellano!"
He did. Enthusiastically.
It was the bottom of the 8th, bases were loaded and the time out had just ended. The crowd was silent as Derek Jeter stepped up to the plate. The ball came at him nice and center, he swung and hit a home run so beautiful and clean that had Danny Castellano had been paying attention, it would have made him cry.
As it was, he was too busy staring at Mindy Lahiri to notice at all.