Ok, this is a newish sort of story, so it is really weird. Enjoy, Gredfeorge.

Disclaimer- I do not own Harry Potter, or anything by J.K. Rowling, though I would like to.

The HP Files

"Hello, my name is Harry Potter, Harry for short, and I will be recording my whole day at Hogwarts on this recorder that I am recording myself on right now." Harry said after pressing record on a small pocket sized recorder that he had found in Voldemort's room.

Harry cleared his voice and continued, "I suspect you are wondering how I got this wonderful recorder, well, it all started at the Weasley's house, I was using Floo powder to get Diagon Alley, but saying "Diagon Alley," like I was supposed to, I said, "Voldemort's Room!" Harry paused to blink away some tears as Draco patted his back.

"There, there Potter," He said, "It wasn't to bad, was it?"

Harry turned to Draco, "Stupid, you know nothing!" he yelled, and Draco disappeared with a silent poof.

"Anyways," Harry sighed, looking out of the window, down to where Fred and George were chasing Percy around the lake, then threw him in once they caught him, "Well, after I said "Voldemort's Room," I appeared there, and found this recorder lying next to a fluffy pink teddy bear. Naturally, I would have gone for the fluffy pinkness, but this was a special occasion. I picked up the recorder and listened to what was recorded onto it for awhile, then, I got bored of bored and erased it all. People don't really enjoy listening to evil. Ways of killing fifteen year old boys such as myself." Harry paused again, and hugged the tiny recorder.

"Then, I climbed back into the chimney, and shouted, "Diagon Alley!" though, nothing happened, because I had no Floo powder, so I just walked there, it didn't take too long, it was only a few blocks away. And that is the whole story. Now I shall go to see my fellow friends. Off I trot." And with all that said, Harry trotted out of the door to go find Ron and Hermione, and the rest of his fan clubs.

"Ok," Harry said pressing record once more, "Now I am here with friend number one on my list of friends, Ronald Weasley."

Ron raised his eyebrows, "Harry, are you ok?" he asked feeling the forehead belonging to Harry.

Harry shook it away, "I am bloody fine, I would like you to meet my recorder, recorder, Ron, Ron, recorder, Harry, Ron, recorder. Remember that ok." Harry chanted, not taking a breath.

Ron scooted his chair away from Harry, but Harry, sensing that Ron was going to move his chair, after he did it, moved right next to him instantly.

"Ok, Ron, what do you like most about Hermione?" Harry asked sticking recorder into Ron's face.

Ron blushed, and started to stutter.

"Not to worry Ron, we all know you like her," Harry pressed paused, and whispered; "I read your diary." Then he pressed record, and waited for Ron to say something, but Ron was too shocked to speak.

"Potter!" Malfoy's voice echoed across the Great Hall, as he made his way to where Harry sat.

"Great, my arch enemy." Harry said poking Ron, to make sure that he had not died after not moving for so long.

"Potter!" Malfoy yelled again, now standing next to Harry.

"Ouch, yes, that is my ear." Harry said rubbing his throbbing knee.

"Listen Potter," Malfoy said ignoring Harry's pained toe, "I don't like it when you call me stupid ok."

Harry stared up at him, and then at Crabbe and Goyle, they stared back, "My you're fat." He said rubbing his stomach.

They growled and clenched their fists.

"Well, I would love to stay and chat, but, I have to get a whole day worth recorded, before it's too late." Harry said picking up his back and pressing stop on the recorder, and trotted away happily.

Malfoy looked at Ron, who still was not moving, and poked him in the shoulder, "Oh well," he shrugged, "let's go."

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"Well, I am back, talking to Hermione Granger, who I found reading a book in the library." Harry stuck the recording devise in Hermione's face, "Tell me, why do people always read in a library?"

Hermione pushed the devise away and rolled her eyes, "What did my parents tell you about too many sweets Harry?" she asked turning the page in Hogwarts a History.

Harry paused to think, "But Hermione, I haven't had any sweets, honest." "Unless you count the four boxes of chocolate frogs you had last night." He thought, but quickly pushed it out of his head.

"Hermione is being very boring, so I am going to go find another one of my friends, Harry out." He pressed stop, and proceeded out of the library.

"Hi Harry!" Dennis Creevey said walking up to him.

Harry looked at the small boy, and turned around and walked the other way, away from him. "There has to be someone in this castle!" he yelled walking down the crowded halls of Hogwarts.

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"Ok, Ginny, just be yourself." Harry smiled, getting ready to press record, "You are on in 3.2.1," he pointed to Ginny, and pressed record. "Hello again, I am with Ginny Potter, I mean Weasley."

"Um, Harry?" The small red headed child interrupted, blushing furiously.

"Yes Ginger?"

"I was uh, sort of in the middle of Transfiguration, I don't think Mcgonagall wanted you to drag me out of her class."

"Yes, well Ginny, we can't always have what we want, now can we? Just talk into the recorder, ok?"

Ginny looked down at the recorder, "Harry, er are you alright?" she asked.

"Peachy, why?"

"Well, you are, er talking into a fluffy pink teddy bear." Ginny smiled nervously pointing at Harry's recorder.

Harry looked down and slightly jumped with surprise, "Wow, you are right; I guess I did go for the fluffy pinkness after all. I knew it was too tempting to pass up." He looked back up at Ginny, "Oh well, Ginny, just talking into the fluffy pinkness."

Ginny stared at Harry, "I need to go back to class Harry." She said and walked out of the room.

Harry sighed, and carried the fluffy pink bear back up to the common room, to enjoy watching Fred and George throw Percy into the lake, with his new friend, Mr. Pinkness.

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Meanwhile back at Voldemort's room.

Voldemort destroys his room looking for his long lost pink teddy bear.

A/N- I hope you laughed its ok if you thought it was the stupidest thing you have ever read, I agree, it is stupid, but that is ok. Please review! Thank you! Gredfeorge.