not all mine :) enjoy!
Imperfection;
There were days that stayed with you forever; tattooed on your mind, condemned to replay when you find your resistance slipping. And it seemed like the world itself echoed your inner turmoil; the sky opened up and poured its contents on the earth, drenching every single thing in sorrow. How sometimes it seemed like all of existence was being ripped apart at the seams, and all you could do was stand and stare in quiet surrender because, really, you can't change a damn thing.
But then there were days when all you wanted to do was scream in delight and laugh and laugh until you could no longer take it. And there are times when all the small parts of your life felt like they worked in perfect harmony, and yes, you could conquer the world. How all you could think of was kissing him, and his arms around you and the way he looks at you like you are the day star and you light up his everything.
And today was one of the first days, when you felt like crumbling in on yourself, because why, why couldn't he just see that you loved him so much it hurt? That you loved him so much he completely ruined you for every other boy to come after him (although, if you had your way, there would be no other). You were dancing on the edge, tip toeing over every possibility and insecurity and you were about to fall so, so far, but you couldn't care less, because at this point falling seemed so much better than this dancing you had been doing.
She was being to think that he was forgetting what it felt like to be completely head over heels in love, and she wanted to turning up a storm because she couldn't think of a way to make him remember. And love be damned if she became another faded memory; she couldn't handle that. She needed to be here and now and present, and even if she couldn't see him, oh god, she could feel him everywhere, because this was his shirt she had on and she was wearing her heart on his sleeve.
She'll never tell him how many tears she had shed wearing that shirt.
Then the wind picked up, and she shut her eyes and she thought that it was finally, finally time to take the leap and the plunge and the fall. She stretched out her arms and turned her back to the edge, because if she was going to do this, she didn't want to see, she just wanted to feel. Her hair whipped around her face and she thought they felt a little like his fingers, soft and gentle and always on her skin in fleeting moments. All of a sudden she can hear his voice, above all the noise, and his fingers do lace themselves in her hair and his lips replace their gentle touch.
There she is again, in the in between, where everything was perfect and real and safe, but she knew it couldn't last, because this was all just a dream, and she was probably already falling.
"Teddy, my mind is playing tricks on me," she murmured against his chest. He wrapped his arms around her and held her body close; it was slick with rain, just like his, and he could feel her slipping away. He shushed her, with a small lingering kiss to her lips and then she was there in full force, clutching and tugging and anchoring herself to what she thought was just a fading dream.
"No, Lily. I'm really here," he assured her, placing his calloused hands on her soft, supple face and staring into her green flashing eyes. Around them the wind howled and the sea crashed and the rocks fell away from beneath them, one by one and he felt his hold on her slipping.
"You're not; you've never been really here, with me."
And she blinks the rain (and tears) from her eyes and pushes him away, because she can't bear to have him see her in her moment of weakness.
"Why are you doing this, Lily?" He really can't understand.
"I love you, Teddy. I will always love you, and I'm sorry," she whispered. It carried on the wind, and dissipated right in front of his face, and all he wanted to do was have her take her words back.
"You sound like you're saying goodbye," he told her, moving forward to take her in his arms again, because he was scared that if he let her go, she would simply vanish.
She smiled a sad smile, the very same one he had grown to love and he was never, ever going to let her say goodbye, because he would be lying if he said he didn't need her.
"No one needs me, Teddy," she said, just like she had read his mind. His hair turned black, just like his mood and he smoothed her fire halo hair away from her perfect face.
"Then what am I doing here, Lily? Tell me, because I don't understand what would make you say something like that."
"I think," she said, clutching at his shirt. "You care about me more than you let on."
"Of course I do, but that's not the point. The point is you have people who love you, people who would be completely devastated if you did what you were about to do. I don't think you can fathom how much people care about you, and you can't just say goodbye to people like that."
"Teddy?"
"Yes?"
"Would you have cried at my funeral?"
And he snapped.
"What the fuck is wrong with you, Lily? What kind of a stupid question is that? You want the truth? I don't think I could have stepped in the room, because seeing your lifeless body would have driven me insane. I would have torn the whole fucking world apart for you; I would have just lain down and died, Lily, because I can't imagine what this place would be like with you in it."
She laughed a high tinkling laugh that warmed him from the inside out and the world made sense to her now, because she wasn't dreaming and he was really here and the words coming out of his mouth was music to her ears. She pushed him, again and again and again, until he staggered away from the edge and fell flat on his back. When he looked up his vision was filled with her; her dripping sizzling hair that stood out stark against the grey solemn sky and her body reaching for him, lowering herself until she lay right beside him on the cold, wet ground. He laced their hands together, trying to tether her to him.
He was looking at her like she the day star again, lighting up his dark world. His lips were on hers and there was a transfer of light and they were together under the torn apart sky, and the howling wind and the memories and the perfect harmony.
Because all they needed was the imperfection to feel like they were absolutely perfect. All they needed was each other and the messed up (incredible) moments.
And here, on the edge of the world, they were whole.
mmm, another lily teddy one shot :) hope you all like this one! review pretty pretty please! and check out my other one shots and stories :)