Christopher Throndyke is a 27 year old Man and Shadow is as timeless as a glass of orange. When they look at each other, it's like a Jesus smile, or a warm sand.
Shadow thinks it's weird that Chris is wearing a wig but he doesn't say anything because it reminds him of Maria. And a Maria to Shadow is a soothing thing to him of her, like a blanket or a false sense of security.
"Shadow," Christopher Thorndyke sayd, skateboarding in through the window of his parents house with a wig on and a big coat. "We never talk anymore. Not when Sonic goes on his missions anymore."
"Hm?" Shadow the hedgehog sayd, thinking about motorbikes. "I'm sorry, I was busy thinking about motorbikes. What did you say?"
"I just..." Chris kickes up his skateboiard over his shoulder and onto the couch behind him as he approaches the armrest of the chairt SDhadow is sitting on to sit on next to him and them. "Was wondering why we don't talk more... Shadow..."
Shadow stops thinking about motorbikes for a second. "I... don't know," he sayd. "Did you want to talk about motorbikes?" he sayd, thinking about motorbikes again.
"Not just about motorbikes," Chris sayd, "about your hopes and dreams about your sexual desires."
Chris throwed his armes in the air and Shadow could tell he hurt him and them. "I'm sorry, Chris," he sayd, looking down at his fancy sneakers, not thinking about motorbikes at all anymore. Just thinking about thinking about motorbikes, and how it had hurt his friend Christopher Thornsdyke. "I guess I was thinking so much about motorbikes that I forgot to think about your feelings. And then Sonic went to go do a Sonic mission with all his friends again and they left me behind again because I'm black again and I. I don't know, Chris. I just thought about motorbikes more. The way they skrr and vroom vroom. You know?"
"It's okay, Shadow," Chris sayd. "I like to think about big trucks and trains sometimes."
"What's... your favorite kind of truck, Chris-kun?" Shadow blushed and sayd timidly, his eyes blinking and averting, pretending this isn't a conversation he had prepared for once when he wasn't thinking about motorbikes at all.
"M-my favorite...?" Chris blushed and sayd, putting his hands to his red cheeks. He wasn't prepared for such a personal question. He'd asked Shadow what his favorite motorbike was before when he was feeling particularly vulnerable (a/n: Shadow's favorite motorbike is a tie between Hardly Daveson and West Coast Choppers [the motorbike not the shirt]) but he had never expected Shadow to ask him what his favorite train or even truck was in a billion years. "I-I guess I like peterbuilt a bunch," Chris-kun sayd as he blushed and looks away.
Shadow hadn't expected him to answer him like that. Normally when he talked to Sonic or his friends and them, they would say something less like "I-I guess I like peterbuilt a bunch," as they blushed and more something like "YOUR BODY IS THE COLOR OF THE VOID," or "YOUR BODY IS VOID OF COLOR" or even "YOUR FIGURE REMINDS ME OF MY EXISTENTIAL MISERY THAT I FEEL WHEN I CLOSE MY EYES AND KNOW WITH TRUTH AND UNDERSTANDING THE INEVITIBILITY OF DEATH." But not something like "I-I guess I like peterbuilt a bunch," as Chris-kubn had sayd while he blushed.
Shadow blushed and sayd "peterbuilt is my f-favorite too..." his eyes downcast as deep down inside he had hoped he had sayd that.
Christopher-kun Throndyke-chan's eyes widened in a realization he had never understood never before. "You like trucks, Shadow-san?"
Shadow nods gravely. "I enjoy the loud grumbling noises they make on the road, and it's good when they honk their horns. I like peterbuilts a bunch the best."
"Shadow... do you know why this wig I'm wearing on my head is on my head?" (an: remember from earlier the wig was on Chris-kun's head that remindad Shadow-san of Maria? it's still there and that's important~~_) Cheris-kun sayd and blushed some more.
"No," Shadow sayd as he blushed wondering why that had anything to do with peterbuilt trucks. "But it reminds me of Maria, she was my sexy mom who loved me/" Shadow sayd as he blushed again, trying to hide it with his fingers as he feeled expeshially vulnerable around Chris-kun, expeshially when he wored that wig he weared on his head.
"I knowed all about that, Shadow," Chris-kun blushed as he stood up and unbuttoned his big coat, dropping it to the floor revealing Maria's launjurae (a/n: launjurae means sexy clothes) from underneath the big coat he took off. "Just because we don't talk," Chris-kun sayd and blushed, "doesn't mean I don't think about your... cock..."
Shadows eyes widened and he blushed. "Th-that's Maria's sexy clothes launhurae! Wh-where did you get that?!"
"From her dead body," Chris-kun sayd and blushed. "I found it in space after I saw you playing in your bellybutton while talking about her..."
"Y-you saw that?" Shadow blushed and sayd. His fingers couldn't hide his shame this time.
"Yeah," Chris-kun sayd advancing on him like a tax on one of my daddy's tax advances. "I saw everything. It's okay. It made me horney. (a/n: horney means sexual here and not covered in horns)"
"Ch-Chris-kun?" Shadow stammered.
"Yeah?" Chris-kun blushed as he sayd that and rubbed his butthole against the vulpine's thigh.
Shadow gulped and sayd "*this/* is making me horney."
"This is makinge me horney too," Chris sayd.
Shadow blushed as Chris-kun's tongue invaded the inside of his nostril like some kind of alien looking for earth gold, but instead of tasting earth gold, Chris-kun tastes Shadows boogers. Chris-kun like's the taste of Shadow-sans noseburgers, they're salty and gooey like some kind of oiled and salted noodle.
Shadow bited off his glove in a hurry before spitting on it and gently easing it into Chris-kun's bellybutton.
Chris-kun moans softly, like a small animal or a mouse as the big finger on Shadowd hand stretches his bellybutton to capacity. Navule walls stretching like a yoga instructor before a hard lesson on bodily disfiguration.
"Oh Shssshhhhshshsadow-san! Be gentle! I've never done this before?" Chris sayd and blushed.
Shadow blushed. "Y-you're a virgin?"
Chris-kun blushed and sayd "h-hai... irigato no bellybutton sexuu~(a/n: that means "my bellybutton chastity is sacred~..." in Japanese)
Shadow blushed. How had he knowed Shadows native Japanese tongue like that? He must have googled all day.
"Chincho dengpu dakka dakka pleenbow. Mihoy nagasaki chinchin waaaaaa." (a/n: that means something really sexy in Japanese)
Chris-kun blushed so hard he had a spray of nosebleed from his nose into Shadow's open nose and mouth he is very embarrassed. "I'm so sorry, Shadowo-san! I didn't mean to nosebleed in your nose and mouth!"
Shadow blushed. "It's okay," Shadow sayd licking his lips and nose with his unusually long tongue. "I liked it a bunch the best. Like how I like peterbuilts and Hardly Davesons."
"Th-that much...?!" Chris blushed and gushed and grinded his butthole on him.
"I'll tell you what I would like better." Shadow sayd.
"What's that that you would like better Shadow-san?" Chris blushed and sayd.
"I'll show you." Shadow sayd.
"Show me what?" Chris blushed and sayd.
"I'll show you what I would tell you what I would like better," Shadow sayd and blushed.
"Okay," Chris sayd. He was blushing all over, especially his boy parts. (a/n: only refer to Penis as boy parts if you are confident that the person whose Penis you are referring to identifies as a boy, ok? Ok.)
Shadow picks Chris-kun up over his head and wigglewaggles his slippery and slimy and unusually long tongue into his puckering wanton boyhole (a/n: again, only calling it a boyhole because I'm confident Chris-kun identifies as a boy in this here story. if he identifies as a girl in your story be sure to call it a girlhole ok? Ok.)
His slimy lickingtool worms its way up his butt and colon like the reverse of a tapeworm getting pulled out by daddy because I eated my fingernails too much.
Chris-kun is lowered closer and closer towards Shadow-sans gaping maw as his jaw unhinges and stretches wider and wider, wide enough to fit Chris-kun's whole body into his straining mouth, operating him like a puppet show for his teeth, who all laugh and smile independantly.
Puppet Chris-kun pretends Shadow-sans tongue is his own tongue in his mouth and blows a raspberry. Shadows mouth closes slowly as his teeth cheer and clap to deafening applause and the show is over. They lived happily ever after, and it didn't even matter that Shadow was black.
The. End.
Concept by;
King Hadbar
Produced by;
King Hadbar, Swiper. No swiping
Written by;
Backpack, backpack
Executive producers;
backpack bootswiper map
Music;
Kiss From A Rose on the Grape by Seal and T.I.M.E. by Neil Cicierega
Sound department;
Slurping and slopping sounds courtesy of RhysWhilde writing about Star Fox getting raped.
An SBAC production.
No cartoon hedgehogs were sexualized in the making of this here story, except Shadow the hedgehog, who got pretty sexualized.
All participants over the age of eighteen and completely legal to have sex with or fantasize about having sex with or watch having sex.
Sonic and Sonic X characters owned by backpack bootswiper map of America.
All Rights Reserved.