Title: Even After Everything
Author: Krystal M
Fandom: Big Hero 6
Chapter: 1/1
Word Count: 1,321 words
A/N: Well, I was in angst mode and this came up from listening to thousands of sad/depressing songs about how someone lost their loved ones or break-up songs. In no way, did I had a break-up but somehow, being a teen is prone to non-existent angst, I suppose. /sighs Anyways, I posted this in AO3 under the pen name KrystalM. Or, you could just go to my profile and click on the link to get to my AO3 Account~! It's fun sharing. Okay, so that's done. If I'm not too lazy, I might actually write out a multi-chaptered fic on how Hiro acts out on that making the time machine and going back in time to stop Tadashi stuff. It might end up as Hidashi slash though...meh /shrugs
Okay, done rambling now. Do enjoy!
It still shook him from within. It didn't matter no matter how long it has been. No matter if it was all over once upon a time. The pain was still as fresh as it was yesterday. The sweat from the dream, from the memories he had to relive, it was pounding loudly in his head until he had to open his eyes. It was too much for him to take sometimes, but somehow, that same pain was all he got to force himself to get up every day.
It was insane at the same time, how so much had happened in the span of two years since that day. And now, the day was approaching closer and closer, only for him to relive it all over again. The smile he used to love as he grew up, the encouraging words he used to listen when he was down, that voice that coos at him whenever he was scared, that person he came to love since his parents had to leave them alone—the said person was no longer here next to him like he was supposed to be.
And now, he was alone too.
Sometimes, anger washed over him. How could he have the heart to leave him alone? Didn't he know that he was all he ever had besides Aunt Cass? How could he have left him to watch that? Tears were hot and heavy prickling at the edge of his eyes even after all this time. Anger still lived inside of him every time he had to reflect back to that incident. But he knew deep inside, somewhere buried, that he couldn't change the events even if he had tried.
His friends, they had tried to take his mind out of the ache every time the date rolled closer. They tried to keep him smiling, tried to keep him away from remembering about him. But he did, somehow every night, especially when the nightmare pulled him out to the reality after reliving the horrendous event behind closed eyelids. Where his things lied around, he would remember back how close they were.
He was like his father, mother, brother and a friend all rolled into one.
So, sometimes he questioned himself, questioned his brother's actions: Did he ever think of him when he went straight to his death?
The slowing ticking sound of the clock, it kept him wide awake as the sun rolled into horizon. The ache intensified at each passing minute as the silence washed over. Slowly blinking, he looked to his right, noticing the small red box against the wall. That was the only thing right now that kept him sane whenever he was around memories of his brother.
The thing his brother created in hopes to save humankind. That noble act of his that had created this bot that was deflated and resting in that red container box. His good nature had always made his younger brother, what could have possessed him to be so optimistic? He never questioned his younger brother on his decisions. Instead, he would scold at him slightly before giving in and helping him out.
He could see the light in him when nobody else could. He could see his little brother's extraordinary talents when he, himself couldn't see that in himself. Something in the way his older brother would joke around him made his day. Sometimes, he would miss his brother when the university life took over his older brother's life and he had to come back home late at night. Sometimes, they would fight because of something stupid but no matter how hard they pushed themselves far apart, they sprung back together like some rubber band.
And it warmed him deep inside, knowing that he had someone to come back to in the future.
He had someone.
That person was not here now.
"Ouch," he said dryly, startling the white fluff inside of the red box. Inflating with a small hiss, Baymax came into view. Before Baymax could complete his introduction, he cut him off with a simple 'I'm fine.' But that didn't stop the white balloon nurse to do a diagnosis on him.
Listening to the diagnosis, he just sighed in contempt and let Baymax continue. "Do you need to contact your loved ones? Contacting—"
"No," he said slowly as Baymax immediately cut the line off. Silence filled in before he slowly sat up, sighing again before looking at Baymax and smiling. "Hey, Baymax." Baymax just stared at him through the dark black holes.
"Hello, Hiro," Baymax responded, somehow sounding slightly confused, if that was possible. Seconds ticked on before he looked away from Baymax and around his room. His room, how distasteful that sounded inside of his head, especially when it was their room all this time before two years ago.
"Maybe I should create a time machine and stop him," Hiro said softly, somehow sounding as if he was more talking to himself. Baymax just remained quiet as he let Hiro talk. "Go back in time and yell at him to think about me for once. To tell him that Callaghan never died. Would he have stayed?"
"I don't know, Hiro," Baymax said. Hiro just let out a soft chuckle before the silence took over again. Even after two years, it still pained him. Why was it even after all of this defeating Callaghan stuff, it still strike deep inside that he was alone? Even when he had Fred, Wasabi, Gogo Tomago and Honey Lemon, he still felt lonely. Maybe it was because they also reminded him of—of him.
Swallowing a lump in his throat, he felt the hot tears prickling in his eyes and the deep wash of negativity washing over him, just like he had felt the first few weeks after he died. He didn't want to cry, he shouldn't. He knew that what he brother did was heroic and he should know that he would always be remembered. Looking back at Baymax, he couldn't hold back the tears anymore.
Even after two years, he was still like that fourteen year old kid that Tadashi had left behind. Baymax trotted forward slightly as Hiro extended out his hand and buried his face into his big floating stomach. Baymax awkwardly placed his arms around Hiro and patted him, just like how his brother used to when he got sad.
"I miss him," Hiro said absent-mindedly as Baymax continued to pat him.
"Would you like to see him?" Baymax asked as Hiro chuckled.
"It's not the same," he said as he sighed, trying to keep himself from shedding into a sorrowful sob. "His death anniversary is today."
"Tadashi is always with us," Baymax said slowly as Hiro nodded into his hug.
"Yeah," Hiro said. "He's always here. But sometimes I wish he was here here, you know?" Hiro said slowly as he looked to the ground. His mind whirling gently as he closed his eyes and hugged the nurse bot closer, shedding a few more tears.
Baymax said nothing else as Hiro stayed like that. A few minutes ticked on and before he knew it, the sun had coloured inside of his room through the curtain a light shade of orange. It was dawn. The tiredness slowly crept back inside of him and as even if he did try to keep his eyes wide awake, he couldn't do it. He still had a few more hours left before he could visit Tadashi.
Sighing, his eyes closed down and his mind shut down. Baymax noticed Hiro going limp slowly as his breathing deepened. Slowly, Baymax pulled Hiro away and placed him on his bed, somehow covering him up with the blanket.
As the darkness claimed back slowly, he thought he heard his brother's voice somewhere outside, humming at him with a sorrowful voice.
'I'm so sorry, Hiro.'