Title: When Morning Comes
Author: Vicky aka Amyro_Nightfire aka A_N
Couples: StRo, BBRa
Rating: PG:13
Disclaimer: I don't own the titans or its characters.
Summary: Set after Apprentice 2. The gang have all forgiven Robin, but he hasn't truly forgiven himself. And now he also realises that he's fallen in love.

Authors Note: So I have been waiting so long for the new episodes of Titans to show up on my TV, but because I live in England that is going to take a while! So I need something to occupy the time now don't I! Oh and this will mainly be in Robin's POV. I will also be assuming that this is Dick Grayson if what I've been told about Nightwing being in the first of the new series is true! I am also assuming that Cy is 18, Robin and Raven are 17 and BB and Star are 16. Just to make things interesting! Also this did star out as a 1 part fic, but I kinda got some ideas to continue the fic a bit further.

An insight into the boy that once was

You know its funny sometimes, life that is. Things are fine one moments, and then completely and utterly crazy the next! I used to love the unpredictability of my, the thrill that ran through my veins when I went out everyday not knowing what to expect. Danger was always just around the corner, and I was reading and willing. I wanted the danger, wanted the thrill of the chase, I wanted to have that feeling that every time I left the house could be the last time I did. It sounds stupid I admit, but in a way it became a part of who I was.

Then again back then I was just the sidekick. Back then I knew I was safe because just behind me was my mentor, the one who had taught me everything I knew. Back then I could sit on the sidelines and watch how he used to take control and turn every situation to his advantage. Back then everything I ever thought was thrilling or dangerous or unpredictable was complete and utter bullshit.

It wasn't until I was a leader that I learnt what thrilling, dangerous and unpredictable was. I'm not really sure how it all began, but quickly the Teen Titans became the biggest part of my life. First came Cyborg who quickly became my best friend. Sure we argued sometimes, but it was just our way. I guess it's mainly because we were both as stubborn as each other, but it never really mattered.

After Cy, BeastBoy joined us. I don't really remember how that happened. One day it was 2 of us, then the next day there BB was cooking us a tofu breakfast. Ever since then there has been the daily arguments of meat Vs Tofu. Fascinating stuff really.

It was just the 3 of us for about 2 months, before we were joined by Raven. She saved our lives really. Us guys went out to stop a robbery, and somehow nearly managed to get a building land on us. Raven appeared and prevented any harm from coming to us. She would never admit this but I think she was grateful that we gave her somewhere to belong and just be herself – whatever that means, I'm not quite sure really.

So for months it was just the four of us, fighting crime, avoid BB's tofu, and getting along with our lives. Yet I always felt something was wrong in my life. And then she appeared. The four of us got a call downtown. A fight had broken out, that began to turn violent. However by the time we got there only a girl remained.

*Flashback*

"Yo what happened here? We were expecting a load of fighting not some girl just standing doing nothing!" Cy exclaimed clearing pissed off not to get any fighting in.

"Where did all the people go?" Raven asked the girl. I wanted to talk to her, but her appearance had me awestruck. She appeared to be about 5ft 8, so taller than me, with long red hair, and the biggest green eyes I had ever seen. She was so beautiful; I had never seen anything look so good or so pure in my whole entire existence.

"I brought peace upon the people. I did not wish anyone harm, so I simply talked to them. They appeared to agree with me and then they proceeded to leave. Was that not the correct procedure?"

"Man they really listened to you?" BB looked amazed by this point. "That is so totally cool, maybe we should try it more often!" She smiled at BB and then began to float away from us. By this point I finally found my voice.

"Where are you going?" She paused and looked towards me.

"I have been informed to find a group entitled the Teen Titans. It has been arranged between my home world and the one this planet calls Batman, that I shall join their group to help protect this city against crime." I smiled at her.

"Welcome to the group then. We're the Titans. And what may we call you?"

"Starfire."

*End Flashback*

And that was the first time in which I met star. Nothing earth shatteringly fantastic, but all the same it touched me. But I never thought of that moment again for a long time. The two of us became best friends, and although Cy was still by best friends what Star and me had was something so much more. And over time I didn't realise that I was falling in love with her. I hid it away in the bottom of my heart, hoping that if I didn't really think about it, then maybe the feeling would just go away. It only began to make itself known when her sister turned up, and I nearly lost star. After that incident the love I felt began to grow, and in some respects it made me feel like a better person. I had to protect Star as well at all costs. For one so strong, she often got herself into danger. But I was always also willing to save her, to protect the love that I now felt for her. Just seeing her around everyday gave me hope, and I was becoming more confident in my love and in my destiny.

It would have been perfect if it weren't for Slade. I was so consumed with my hatred for him, that I couldn't see that I was pushing my friends away from me, and hurting them in the process. I couldn't even see that I was becoming Slade, that the battle between good and evil was becoming a battle between what was right and what I thought was right. Trust me there is a huge difference between them. What I thought was right was pretty much becoming everything bad. But I didn't know this, had no understanding until the Red X incident.

*Flashback*

"Slade did not trust you and you did not trust us."

*End Flashback*

I knew then what I had become, but I couldn't face the truth. So I became more withdrawn, even more consumed with defeating Slade. I wanted him gone from my life, and I desperately wanted to prove to everyone that I was not like him. Of course like all good things, I was completely and utterly wrong. By deigning what Star had told me, and became even more like Slade. And I was hurting the ones that I loved even more. But I couldn't stop, on some level I didn't want to stop. I wanted to find out how this would end, the danger led me down a road that I never thought I would go. Even becoming Slade's apprentice to protect the ones I love, I wanted to see what I could do, how far I could play Slade's game without becoming totally gone.

Yet I stopped playing the game far sooner than I think either Slade or even myself expected. I fought my friends, and I didn't stop, didn't really care that I was hurting them physically and mentally doing so. Expect for her. She stood in front of me, with her hand stretched before her. In that moment we were complete opposites in everything that we stood for. My heart was cold, closed off from the truth that was now my life. Before me was something so good, so pure, so right that it almost hurt to look at her. Still I stood my ground, and was ready to harm her. I would have too I was so far gone.

Instead she stood down.

*Flashback*

"Robin we are best friends. I cannot live in a world were we must fight. If you are truly evil then do what you must."

*End Flashback*

And my heart was cracked open. I pushed them all away, I hurt them, I didn't trust them, I joined the enemy. I put up defences so high that not even my mentor was this closed off. Yet this slip of a girl managed to fight past them all without really trying. Behind all her naivety, I saw wisdom beyond her years, and that it wasn't until that moment that she had given up on me. Just the thought that someone had faith in my doing something right was a fantastic feeling, but then knowing that I was so far gone, that the hope was lost, made me want to be a better person. I wanted to amend what I had done, and I knew that if I could earn her trust, earn her love then maybe I wasn't like Slade at all.

Still it wasn't until I saw Slade killing her that I snapped completely. If Slade would take my friends, and my love from this world, then I was gonna go with them. Screw the fight for good and evil, screw everything. I wasn't going to let Slade win, I wanted to die with Star by my side.

Luck had it that I played a good hand. We defeated Slade; heck with even had some uncharacteristic comments by Raven. But I knew that I had changed, and the whole group had changed with me. It would take a long time before they would forgive me completely, but mostly I wanted Star to forgive me, and maybe in time love me like I loved her.

So until I can figure out how to fix what I had broken, I'm content to watch the morning come in.