Set: Supernatural AU Season 14

History: Right along to what we know about Season 13 up to Episode: 19. Than starts the AU with probably different ideas of how Season 13 ends and what is Season 14 about.

Writer: uddelhexe. I normally speak German and I yet don't have a beta reader to clean up my English mess. But I hope you can enjoy the story though my bad English. You can help me improve by giving comments about the writing. Mistakes will be there…I try to find, but some I just see when the story is already in upload. I hope there will be some nice comments as well and hopefully someone likes the story and is interested in the next chapters of the actual episode and the next episodes as well.

Disclaimer: I do not own the character or the plot of supernatural. This story is just fanfiction and noncommercial work. You can find more art of uddelhexe on .

Have fun!

Chapter 1:

Three weeks.

It only had been three weeks now. They still didn't know how this all came together. How it was possible to do what they did. Save the world. Again. Find mum, find Jack and bring them back.

Well most of them.

Dean couldn't say that he felt much sorry for Ketch, but in some way his last behavior made the hunter's opinion about the kinky man of letters merc change. Not too much, for he still was one of the most repelling dicks, he ever met. But howewer...this asshole had rescued Mary, and that had to count for something. At least he could pay the outstanding bill to Mary, which he had caused by betraying and nearly killing her. And Dean was sure that the letters man finally died in some kind of piece.

To think of his mother without going crazy was difficult. He could understand her decision. He really did. She never really managed it to match in this new life with Sam and himself as adults…she somehow still was stuck into the past. A past in which her sons still were young children with all their life laying ahead of them. She never got the chance to grow into her role as a mother in the way it should be. Dean always new that it was difficult for Mary to speak to her boys as a mother with the touch of some experience when in fact her oldest son was in the same age as she was herself.

When the chance came up to go her very own way with someone she learned to adore a lot…with an aim that was so noble that it was the right thing for a Winchester to gain…she just took her chance.

But the decision made her part with her boys. Their ways were never meant to go along…just apart.

It was hard for Dean to take that. It was even more for Sam, but Mary was a strong woman and always known for her strong will. And so she stayed in the nearly destroyed apocalypse world to help defend humanity against Michael's army. To strike with the very heart of a Winchester against every evil on that world. A world that desperately needed every warrior it could possibly get. And she was one of the best. Dean knew that. And so he let her go. The third time in his life…and the last time for sure

Sam and Dean both promised not to open the rift to the other earth ever again and as well to destroy every written word about how to do it. So that Michael, if not defeated, would never get a chance to lay a hand on earth. Her home. The home of her boys. Of her legacy.

Sam was sitting in the war room talking to Cas and Jack. Jack had grown a lot in his time on the other side of the rift. He had to fight, had learned to kill with his powers. There was still this young and pure angel boy sitting around, but there also was someone else within him. An adult young man with the knowledge of war and suffering…with unclean hands caused of killing on his own kind.

The much Castiel was happy about to have his son back, and his son somehow Jack was, the much could he feel the young half angels grave pain inside. A pain he knew too well from his own experience. He fought a lot of fights in heaven and on earth… lost friends, and not so much friends, his own life even…and hope more often than wanted, but he never wanted any of this for Jack. He thought of the nice room his mother Kelly had made for Jack, before he was born. So innocent and playful. He had wished so hard, that Jack had been able to have a good childhood. But he didn't had a childhood at all. And that he had to learn about war and the feeling to kill at such a young age caused Castiel an immense emotional pain. It was his duty to keep Jack safe and until now…he had just failed in doing so. He would never…NEVER let that happen again to Jack in what way ever possible. He once saw what Jack was capable of…what change he could mean to the world…and he was not willing to let this slip away that easy.

Four weeks before…

"Cas. Glad you didn't die, buddy,"Dean said relieved as the angel walked down the stair to the war room. "Good news?" he asked when Castiel showed no sign of saying anything. He just gazed at some random point somewhere in the air in front of him.

Dean began to worry. He felt a strange energy coming from Cas that he somehow knew. And he was sure it was a mood he didn't like much. Castiel's eyes appeared to be red. He looked like he hadn't slept for years. Which was true for the angel didn't need sleep, but he rarely really looked like he should lay down immediately and not get up before 12 hours of sleep or more.

He rushed towards his angelic friend and wanted to grab his shoulder to confront him, but Castiel just walked along and headed to the direction of his room without any reaction on Dean. No…Dean didn't like this. Not at all!

Sam just came from the kitchen that moment and nearly bumped into the angel.

"Cas, what…? He didn't get a chance to ask the angel about his trip to heaven, or if they had a chance to locate Gabriel up there, or even why he looked like coming home from a two day bender. Sam looked at his brother questioningly. "What the hell is up with Cas? Did something go wrong?"

"Ask me! I have no fucking clue," Dean answered sounding a bit pissed. "He just rushed in like being totally out of it and said nothing at all. He didn't even look at me. As if I wasn't there. I mean…really not there. That ain't a got sign."

"Yeah..I kinda not like that. Go ask him what this is about. We need to know if he has any chance to find Gabriel."

"If you want to know so desperately why don't you go ask him? I don't like him that weird."

"Dean. You are hat kind of "profound bound" guy, who is needed now. Talk to him! We need to know."

"Why not let Rowena go talk to him"

"Yes…no. GO!"

Dean grumpled something about something that Sam didn't understand…and didn't want to…but started to search for Castiel in his room. When he reached the place the door was closed. Inside it was quiet. Cas wasn't able to fly so he had to be in there. Dean prepared himself for a most unlikely situation and then knocked while saying: "Cas, c'mon! This mission was important. You can't just come in like that with a look like the apocalypse happened just minutes ago and let me and Sam wait for you to get in the mood to tell us what the hell happened in heaven, ok?"

He planned to wait some time to give the angel a chance to answer. But Dean never was known for his patient temper. So it took hardly five seconds to start shouting again: "Cas, if you don't answer in two seconds I just come in and hit you straight in the face to wake you up."

"Dean. Just live me alone for heaven's sake. I will give you report of everything. I just need…some time."

"Time for what? Pedicure? Are you kidding me? Jack and Mary may not have the time for that! "

"I never ask for something, do I? I just ask for some time now. Let it be an hour, perhaps less. I need to be alone."

"What for? Cas. I am your friend. If there is something to deal with, perhaps I can help you."

"I doubt that." Cas' voice was going to die away with every sentence. He didn't sound well. He seemed week. Tired. Dean wanted to give credit to his friends inquiry but then again...shit Cas: He opened the door and entered the room. Everything inside him was telling him, that Cas should not be alone at this time. That a friend was required…even if the angel didn't know.

Dean stopped. Cas was sitting on the edge of the bed and looked up to him now. His eyes where completely red…and there was something else.

"Cas…did you cry?" Dean was shocked by the sight. He saw Cas doing a lot of things. He saw him angry (a lot), he saw him yell, shout, be angry, happy, crazy…and sometimes on the edge of some too emotional state…but real actual crying…he never saw that .

"What the hell didn't reach your mind when I told you to let me alone?" Ah…angry Cas. That was something Dean could deal with: "Man…what is wrong? What did they do with you up there? I told you it was a stupid idea. But you insisted on going there. Did they hurt you? Was there a fight?"

"No. There was nothing like a fight."

"Then what? Speak to me! Please! You know we have a situation here to deal with. I cannot have one of the team go nuts over some issues I don't know and when I need him the most he breaks. And I really need to know what is about finding that dick of chicking Gabriel with his grace on tour!"

"There is no chance for heaven to find Gabriel. We need to find another way to trace him."

"That just is it? That is what messed you up that much?"

Dean watched the angel who looked down to his shoes and remained quiet. "That is not it, is it? What else, Cas?"

Dean kept his eyes at his friend and waited. He didn't want to push him too hard, but he couldn't risk one more thing going sideways in the team. With every moment the urge to leave the room grew larger and the air seemed to stop moving. Castiel still looked at his feet and his eyes started to get wet again. Dean had the desperate wish to leave the room. He had no idea how to deal with Cas in such a mood. Perhaps 'Go and pat him on the shoulder and say something stimulating.

"I just can't…"Castiels voice went down to a whisper. He hid his face behind his hands and began moaning quietly.

"Go!" he demanded from Dean embarrassed that the human witnessed his emotional weakness. Dean was sure that the angel, once Captain of the garrison that protected earth, didn't want him to see him that pale. He was sure it was in the best interest of Castiel's dignity just to leave the room. But what he saw sitting on that bed wasn't an angel of the lord dealing with some issue of proud…it was a friend dealing with dropping into a black hole. He virtually could see him falling. He could feel Cas was losing it and that he needed to be reminded that there was a hold. That he had friends to count on. Friends who cared about his feelings and his wellbeing.

´That is going to be the Hell of a chick flick moment´ Dean told himself. He went towards Castiel and took a seat beside his friend.

"Please…not…" Castiel tried to repel the hunter, but Dean just grabbed him and drew on him brotherly.

"Whatever it is, Castiel. Sam and I…we are here for you. We do this together. We get Jack back, we get mum back and we end this shit for all time. Heaven can't help. I give a shit. So they can't. When did they ever do something good for us? For you? We don't need them."

"They all gonna die. Heaven…is going to fall apart." The angels voice was trembling.

"Wait…what?" Dean froze. Castiel wasn't able to speak. He was shivering all over his body. He tried to start speaking again…it broke something inside Dean to see his best friend like that.

"It is over, Dean. I can never go home. There is no home left. It is no longer a matter of choice if I live or die. I have to live. I have to. If I want to, or not."

Dean tried to put together what he just heard. He slowly pushed Cas away from his body. "What do you mean with 'if you want to, or not'. Why wouldn't you want?"

Cas tried to wipe away the tears away with his flat hands and sighed. I started to focus again…put himself together again. Then he looked up straight into the green eye of the older Winchester. Castiels deep blue eyes were clear and shiny.

"I was happy to be out of the Empty. I really wanted to be out of this place with nothing in it but me and my thoughts. But really…If I have had a choice: I think I would have preferred to stay asleep. At least in peace and at the end of my journey of failure. Again and again. I rebelled, it is on me that the angels fell, and so many died. I pushed myself to be like God and killed even more of my brothers and sisters and did again so in civil war. Not even Lucifer caused as much death as I did. I am worse than he ever was! Not he is the devil…I AM. Then I got a chance to make it good again. To heal what I did, but did I take that chance? No! I lost Jack because I didn't watch out better. I lost him a second time when I was not able to comfort him when he needed me to help him with this killed guard and at least I lost him a third time because he went to that apocalypse world to find Mary. What a great father I am. What a perfect angel. There is nothing…NOTHING I ever did right!"

There was a short stop. Castiel was angry…but week in his voice when he started again: " My strength is blown away, Dean. I don't mean my mojo, as you call it. I mean mentally. I barely find enough energy to start every day. To stay, to breath and go on. And now I learned that I am one of 9 angels left in the universe. NINE, Dean. We will go extinct. And it is my fault. I didn't only kill a few hundred…I caused the end of my own kind! A kind that was there from the beginning of all creation! And great Castiel, angel of the lord, killed the whole race. Isn't that hilarious?"

Dean wanted to say something to comfort his friend. To say that it wasn't true. That he didn't cause anything…but he couldn't because he knew he would lie to him. Cas didn't mean to do anything bad at all…but he did. And this burden was lying on him like a heavy stone with tons of weight.

"And you don't know the best part. Not only that my kind will while trying to keep heaven running…they will fail one day and the complete system will break down."

"Means?" Dean began to worry more and more with every second.

"Guess how many souls are stored in heaven since the first of mankind looked into a fountain and realized his own face?"

"Cut to the point!"

"You would not be able to count, Dean. But when heaven's gate falls…the storage- system of heaven will open as well and all souls are set free in one big bang."

Dean looked at the angel with wide eyes realizing what Cas was telling him. "You mean…"

"Apocalypse world will be a happy holiday place compared to what will happen all of us when all souls fall down at once…out of their heavens and walk the earth as restless entities for all eternity. And without a chance to hunt and bring them down because there is no light and no tunnel or whatsoever for them to go into. There only will be earth."

Great. They hardly had a plan to stop Mad Max Michael from high-jacking earth and destroy it, and the next "World's end" scenario was right on its way."

"What keeps heaven running?"

"The grace of us nine angels left. And when our energy is depleted there is nothing to hold back the souls from falling."

Really fucking great.