He was surely going to gain a reward for ending the war, that was what he had arrogantly told himself. It was the only way he could avoid thinking deeper about the past, about the mistakes he had made…about the trail of blood he had left behind that he could never clean off his hands. However, the longer he had forced himself to stay alone the more it came to mind, the companions that sacrificed themselves, the ones who left implying a return but couldn't bring himself to, he had torn himself apart in a million different ways without even realizing.

He didn't want to die, not again. He had enough of being something else, this was the reward he had been given? To simply continue on in this cycle as he watches the man he became fade to dust? He could let go of the Doctor, but he couldn't let go of himself. He didn't want another metacrisis, he wanted the man he was now to remain in existence. Even if he was forced to do something else.

He thought of it like a retirement from saving the universe, he'd let the new Doctor be on his or her way…he'd find a quiet planet to rest on and become perhaps a curator? A scientist? Professor? He could work for UNIT full time and give them advice that doesn't result in gunfire. He was sure that Kate Stewart might appreciate an extra pair of hands especially from a veteran in the area such as him.

He'd fantasize about it, but he knew it was quite impossible. He let out a sad laugh to himself in alien ruins on a planet far, far away from any kind of society. It was strange, no matter where he went the rain felt the same. Even if it was blue, pink or purple it sounded exactly like it would on…

Earth.

It was his home for a long time, in a way his heart was still there. It had become quite a precious place, as he lay on the ground feeling the ache in his bones and the sting of his wounds he thought about how nice it would be, to perhaps let himself drift off into regeneration in a dream. He closed his eyes, allowing himself to see days long past.

"Is this your end, Doctor?" The voice of an older female spoke above him, his bright blue eyes snapped open to see the hooded woman staring at him from above "Feeling sorry for yourself?"

"Leave me alone…" His voice cracked, his throat felt so dry and it was as though he had force the words from his lips. "The war is over, let me die."

"Come on now, this is not what you want and you know it." She snapped "You have gained this irritating habit of letting yourself suffer, you know that? You ended the war, the universe owes you at least one favour."

"I do not wish to join the Sisterhood utter boredom. Thank you." He grumbled as he shifted slightly, he guessed he wasn't going to drift away in his sleep after all. So much for that, the one thing he asked for.

"I wouldn't even dream of it." The woman responded "Normally we wouldn't interfere, however with how much we currently owe you I am willing to make an offer. Your life." That caught his attention, his eyes sharpened towards her. "You will let go of your role as the Doctor and be your own life, own being. However, the trade-off is that you create yourself a new role in another universe that needs you. Whatever that may be."

He scanned her as though he was looking for a hint of sarcasm, but she was being serious "What will happen to me then? I will just regenerate eventually-:"

"This will be your only body." She interrupted "You can have the retirement you have been seeking for over a hundred years, unfortunately you will also have to sacrifice your lifespan. But I am sure with your current state of mind you're not exactly going to object."

He scoffed "You think I'm going take any offers from you? What are you all getting out of this?" He asked though his tone made his own throat ache, every bit of trust he once had was tainted by being pulled into a war he wished to avoid. He felt his skin begin the burn. It's starting.

"This isn't an offer." The sister said looking straight into those accusing eyes "This is for your own good." She then stated approaching the weakened man, before he could speak any more words of objection, he felt something slice his way through his stomach. "We did plenty of research on what happens during the regeneration of a Timelord, with the right tools we can separate at least one personality and have it transport it beyond the thin walls between universes."

He felt as though he was seeing lights, he was already in pain sure but whatever this was burned. The fire was more intense than the regeneration itself, he could almost feel himself slipping on his grip to his current body. "Besides…" She spoke once again "All it took was one biological metacrisis for us to learn the information, and how much it benefitted one of your future selves in the process."

He was gasping at this point, his eyes however burned with anger over his consent being taken over the matter. He was angry, in pain and felt himself fading away.

Whatever it was that linked him to the 'Doctor' had been cut off.

"Even a war-torn and bitter man deserves an opportunity to heal."

As his vision faded, only vague images flashed through his mind. It was a sensation like he was falling, a part of him wanted to burst out sobbing pathetically…like a child feeling as though the cards he had been dealt were not fair. He truthfully just wanted to die, with all these good memories and for once without thinking about the guilt.

He never managed to see of Jamie turned out alright, or even checked on Zoe, he managed to see Susan again but he still felt as though he had done was yet to make up for leaving her, then eventually different names came up, Liz, Jo, the Brigadier then one in particular…

He never went back for Sarah Jane, either. He still felt terrible guilt for that, perhaps she had gotten on with her life. He wouldn't be surprised if she despised him for speaking as though he would return but never did, was he even accurate in taking her home? He was never quite good at getting the right place at the right time.

It was then he had hit the ground, hard.