Written for Olivegbg and Gaspode5 with love and appreciation for their story The Narrow Path. I tried to keep it as spoiler free as possible, so go check it out...awesome Duncan/Riordan fic. You can find it under my favorites, under Olivegbg here, or Gaspode5 on DeviantArt.

Alyse sat quietly against the opposite wall of the bed, watching the rise and fall of Riordan's chest as he slept. Another night of drinking, an intimate bout of sex, and the man was passed out as usual. These were the moments she got lost in her own thoughts, wondering just what in the Maker's name she was doing.

His heart, if you could even say he had one, would always belong to Duncan. The way they looked at each other, how they seemed to communicate without words, the very energy between them was impossible to deny. Anyone who was in the same room with the two would know within seconds that they were connected. Even on the oft occasion when they were beating the shit out of each other over one squabble or the next, they fought with as much passion as they loved.

But where did that leave her? Duncan had assured Alyse that Riordan had remained faithful, even after she caught the two of them in bed together, but was he really? Physically, perhaps, Riordan may have changed his whoring ways for a brief moment, but had he ever given himself to her emotionally? Or would that part of him always belong to Duncan? One could argue that Riordan didn't have an emotional connection to anyone because it often seemed he lacked all feeling, but Alyse knew all too well that he did.

It was clear to see in his eyes whenever Duncan entered a room that Riordan had more than love for the man. If word came that Duncan had been injured, you could almost hear Riordan's heart stop beating within his chest out of fear. Alyse did not provoke the same reaction; that much was clear when she had taken an arrow while protecting Duncan, and Riordan had rushed to his brother Warden's side instead of hers. She was the afterthought, always in second place, never his priority.

Yet she continued this dangerous game with her own heart, falling into bed with him, believing in that moment that he was hers and hers alone. When his fingers slid along her skin, his cock hard pressed against her thigh, Alyse could pretend that he genuinely wished to be with her. His kisses were never soft, as that was not his way, but the warmth of his tongue upon hers never failed to excite her. Did he save the more intimate kisses for Duncan?

These thoughts always came after a night of lovemaking, fucking, whatever the day called for. At times Riordan seemed to be there for her and her alone, and at other times there would be that small glimmer in his eyes that meant his mind was elsewhere. Not during, never during, but briefly before and sometimes after, when the uncharacteristic sigh escaped his lips, or when he'd roll over onto his back and stare at the ceiling. He was with Duncan during that time, even if he was beside her.

And she allowed it, and she hated herself for it. What was it about him that kept her coming back? Punishing herself in this way, knowing Riordan would never be completely hers. Was she so desperate that she'd settle for this kind of treatment? Or was there something about him, something she didn't quite understand, that kept her longing to be with him? When his arms were around her, she felt safe, protected, and it reminded her of the last time she had felt that way, when she was very young. Had it really been that long since someone had that effect on her?

But why him? Why this man who was so devoted to another? And why was he doing this with her? It was clear he and Duncan were the superior match, with their history and their loyalty and their love and respect… so why was Riordan willing to risk hurting Duncan to be with her? Was it truly as Duncan said, a possibility once, but that was now lost? Even if it was, the harsh truth always came back to her of never being first in Riordan's life.

There was no going back now, however. Her heart ached for Riordan, in whatever way she could have him. If it meant knowing there'd be drunken nights that he wouldn't return home, where he'd be curled up beside Duncan instead of her, it was worth it for that memory of comfort, of protection, of a time when, during the shit of it all with her family, she was safe. To lose him would be to lose that, to be lost once again in the fear and the unknown. Yes, he loved Duncan. But in some strange, twisted way, Riordan cared for her, as well. The words "I love you" would never be spoken, but he would always protect her. Fiercely, loyally, as much as he did Duncan. In that, they were equal.

It would have to be enough. Because her heart could not bear the thought of not having him in her life. They were Warden's; destined to spend the rest of their lives until the Calling, forever struggling and surviving beside each other. With Riordan came Duncan, both always having her back and Riordan always warming her bed. It was enough because it had to be, because the alternative was just too painful to fathom.

Her thoughts were interrupted as Riordan stirred, patting the empty space beside him. "Get over here."

Alyse smiled inwardly. "How did you even know I was here?" she asked.

"Taint's a dead giveaway," he replied. "And you're a heavy breather."

She rose to her feet and walked over to the bed, playfully punching him hard in the arm. "Ass."

He grabbed her around her waist and pulled her into bed. "You love it," he whispered as he began to kiss her neck.

And there was no denying that she did.

*Thanks to Wintryone for the beta and title. Coverart credit Olivegbg, used with permission.