A/N: Now I know everyone's got a lot of feels right now, myself included. I got a lot of prompts for "cordelia finds misty" and my plan is to incorporate them all together. This will be my first chapter fic so please, hang in there with me on this adventure. This first chapter is not heavy on the feel good times but I promise you it will get better. I'm taking a bit of creative license here and there as well so there's that too. Please let me know what you think and I hope you guys enjoy.
It was exhausting to be the Supreme.
Cordelia shut the door to her room and kicked off her heels before collapsing in a heap on her bed.
It was not the power or the following fame that made Cordelia grateful for her new position, rather the hope she felt during the long days spent planning for the future of her witches. She didn't have to scout for students anymore; they lined up at the front door of the Academy, begging for knowledge and a place to call home. Cordelia was happy to oblige, and she and Zoe had purchased two more houses in the city this week to accommodate the ever expanding student body. One week as the new Supreme and she'd seen more witches at her doorstep than she'd ever seen in her life.
The newfound vigor that had come into this coven truly did make Cordelia ecstatic, as did the brilliant girls that she appointed as her Council. Her days were spent with Zoe and Queenie discussing their future plans, getting to know her new charges and attempting to undo the leftover disaster that her mother had left in her wake. The days were full and happy, and Cordelia was thankful for that.
The nights, however, were her undoing.
The smile she plastered on her face for all to see disappeared the moment her door locked. The heavy weight of despair that Misty's death caused never seemed to dissipate. It lessened to manageable levels with the light of day only to come crashing back when Cordelia was alone.
She could feel the tears welling up in her eyes as the ache in her chest began to expand. Oh, how she missed Misty.
She missed Myrtle, of course. She even missed her mother on scattered occasions. But Misty, her sweet Misty…
This is different, she mused as her hand slid under the pillow beside her. This is worse.
Her fingers curled around the edge of soft fabric, tugging gently on it to loosen it from the hold of the pillowcase. She gingerly brought the shawl to her nose, inhaling the lingering scent of the woman who had turned to ash in her arms. It smelled like earth and honeysuckle, like lilies and fresh air. It smelled like Misty, and it smelled like home.
The knot in Cordelia's chest rose to her throat as the tears began to spill down her cheeks.
I could have saved her. I should have done something. Damn the rules, no one gave a shit about the rules any other time and now she's gone. She's gone. My Misty Day. My love…
With that, the dam broke.
Clutching Misty's shawl to her chest, Cordelia began to sob. She rocked back and forth; attempting unsuccessfully to stifle the weeping she knew was unbecoming for a Supreme. She didn't care, and so she cried.
She cried for Misty, she cried for herself and she cried for the love she was a fool to ignore.
As they did every night, her tears ran out after a time and she was left quietly whimpering Misty's name again and again. As she fell into a restless sleep, she curled around the shawl, burying her nose in the light suede fabric.
I will find you.
I will always find you.
In the hallway, Zoe finally laid down the book she had procured from one of the new students.
It was her nightly ritual to listen to her Supreme, her friend, wail over the loss of Misty Day. She felt sorry for Cordelia. They all missed Misty, but Cordelia had lost a part of her that fateful morning.
She had at first felt as if she was intruding, but her concern for the woman who had brought her back from the dead won out in the end. Every night, she sat vigil outside Cordelia's door, slipping into the mind of any girl who happened to pass by at this hour to block their awareness of Cordelia's cries. Cordelia maintained an air of control and strength, knowledge and compassion to these girls, it wouldn't do to have them judging Cordelia on something they couldn't possibly understand. Zoe had decided the day after the Seven Wonders that she had to help Cordelia somehow, and with Queenie's assistance they began monitoring their arrivals for something, anything that may have an answer to their predicament. The book she held in her hand was promising. Queenie had discovered it in the possession of a young girl from the West Coast and had managed to barter a trade with the girl for the time being.
It spoke of a Native American ritual, with obvious roots in witchcraft that could call a soul back from the depths of Hell. The requirements were strict, and the process itself was dangerous, but she knew that they owed it to Cordelia to make her aware of the ritual.
The first requirement was by far the easiest to meet. It called for the remains of the lost and a memento that held great sentimental power to both the wanderer and the one attempting to call the trapped soul back.
Everyone knew that Cordelia had kept Misty's ashes and that they sat in an intricate urn on the mantle, as her eyes were drawn to it whenever they met in the drawing room, almost as if she expected Misty to appear when she wasn't looking.
As for the sentimental item, Kyle had informed her one day that he had just barely managed to stop one of the new maids from removing Misty's shawl from Cordelia's room. Zoe knew she kept that hidden under her pillow. She also knew that Cordelia kept almost all of Misty's possessions, as she had been the one to help the Supreme move her things when they were forced to give a couple of new students Misty's old room. She didn't allow the new girls to assist, even though they offered, stating that it was not their job.
Zoe knew the truth, that Cordelia didn't trust their new charges to see her choke up while packing Misty's things.
She had heard Cordelia stifle a cry that day, and as Zoe turned to face her she felt her heart constrict painfully in her chest. The look of abject sadness on Cordelia's face as she held the shawl loosely in her hands made Zoe go to her. It was the one Stevie Nicks had gifted to Misty when she visited the coven.
Zoe held out her arms to Cordelia, who hesitated a brief moment. Cordelia glanced up at the door to the room and it quietly shut under her direction. Zoe could see that silent tears were coursing down the Supreme's cheeks. She clutched the garment to her chest and lifted her eyes to Zoe's. She spoke then, her voice tight and raw.
"I loved her. Zoe, I loved her and I never told her…"
The older woman's shoulders began to shake as she stepped into Zoe's embrace.
She rubbed Cordelia's back comfortingly as the Supreme cried in her arms. "I know…I know, Cordelia."
However at a loss for words she was at that moment, Zoe decided that something had to be done. Even though the Supreme had thanked her for her kindness, she hadn't spoken of that day since. Zoe let her ignore it, and for the time being their busy days were filled with their duty to the coven. At night, she and Queenie searched together to fulfill their duty to their friend, their Supreme.
Hearing Cordelia finally fall silent, Zoe stood up quietly and headed towards the room she now shared with Queenie. Cordelia had offered them their own rooms, but they had declined in favor of providing more space for their new girls. She didn't mind, and Queenie was a hell of a lot easier to live with than Madison.
She pushed the door open as Queenie looked up from the pile of books strewn across her bed.
"Hey, Zoe. She asleep?"
Zoe nodded, shutting their door behind her. "I think I found something. It starts on page 42."
She held out the book to Queenie, who took it and began to scan the pages.
"This looks do-able…dangerous, but do-able. You think she's gonna be up for trying?"
Zoe took a seat on her bed, rubbing her tired eyes. "I don't know. It's the most promising so far."
Queenie nodded as she removed the piles of tomes from her bed with a wave of her hand. They settled in orderly piles across the room.
"We have to try, for Cordelia's sake," Zoe said as she lay back in her bed, crossing her arms across her chest and closing her eyes, "and Misty's."