Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius in: Boys to Men
Written By: W00DSMAN
WARNING: ADULT SITUATIONS WITH GRAPHIC SEXUAL CONTENT, DRUG USE, AND SOME VIOLENCE. READER'S DISCRETION ADVISED
Chapter I
Retroville, Present Day.
It's the last day of school at Lindbergh Elementary, everyone including Jimmy Neutron are ready for the best summer of their lives. Jimmy, Carl, and Sheen go to Retroland to celebrate, then a stop at the Candy Bar to top it off, and Jimmy had a date with his girlfriend Cindy Vortex. This was going to be the best day of his life and nothing was going to ruin it, or so he thought.
"Woohoo!" Sheen yelled as he throw all his school papers in the air.
"Yahoo!" Carl snorted.
"This is going to be the best day of our lives, get ready for a day we will never forget!" Jimmy said as the trio headed to Retroland.
"Yeah, We're gonna FUCK SHIT UP tonight!" Sheen screamed as he flipped off the school. Jimmy and Carl looked in disbelief.
"What's with the language, Sheen?" Jimmy asked with a surprised look on his face, as he only heard the word fuck a couple times from his parents.
"What? You guys need to loosen up, for fuck sake, We're men now!"
Carl looked more surprised than Jimmy, but joined Sheen. "Yeah, we're gonna FUCK SHIT tonight!"
Sheen facepalmed at Carl's lack of proper grammar in swearing, "God damnit Carl, you say it in the faggiest way possible, it's FUCK SHIT UP, fuck shit sounds like you're saying fuck a pile of shit, which is fucking gross."
"Yeah, you know what, FUCK IT! WE'RE GONNA MAKE THIS TOWN OUR BITCH TONIGHT!" Carl shouted.
"There you go!" Sheen encouraged.
"Sheen's right, we are men and it's time to act like it." Jimmy said as they approached the ticket booth at Retroland.
"Welcome to Retroland, how can I help you?" The boy at the ticket booth asked.
"3 tickets, we're here to TEAR SHIT UP!" Jimmy yelled at the boy as the boy's jaw was dropped.
He gave the trio the tickets and away they went with they're heads high and they're chests out. They rode almost every ride, but Carl yacked on the Octopuke, and they left. With purple flurp down their shirts and their heads spinning, they headed to the Candy Bar.
"That was totally bitchin'!" Sheen yelled.
"FUCK YEAH!" Jimmy and Carl yelled.
The three boys, now men, walk the dark street of Retroville and before they enter downtown there was a skunky smell in the air. The trio followed the smell and there was Nick Dean smoking a joint, which the trio had no idea what a joint is.
"Nick?!" The three exclaimed.
"Oh, shit, what do you queers want?" Nick responded as he took a puff and took a sip from a bottle in a brown paper bag.
"What are you doing?" Jimmy asked.
"Smoking some DANK, sippin' some WHISKEY." Nick responded.
"Dank? Whiskey?" The trio was confused.
"Alright, you guys are so fucking lame." Nick replied to the trio who were obviously not cool.
"We're not lame, we're cool." Sheen said, desperately trying to gain Nick's friendship.
"Then take a puff and a sip, then you'll be cool." Nick smirked, knowing shit was about to be awesome to watch.
Sheen took a fat hit from the joint, he coughed like a noob and took a huge gulp, which caused a burning in his chest.
"GOOD SHIT." Sheen said, coughing intensely. He handed the joint and the whiskey to Carl.
Carl took two fat rips of the joint, and coughed so hard he gasped for air and used his inhaler. He then took a gulp and spit it out.
"You fucking pussy." Nick mocked.
"Am not!" Carl defended. He took another swig and swallowed, the burn then lingered to his stomach.
"Hey that actually isn't that bad." He took another gulp and passed it to Jimmy, he was very hesitant.
"Come on, don't be a pussy." Sheen and Carl ragged on Jimmy.
Jimmy took a nice, slow drag, He then took a couple gulps of the whiskey and swallowed without a single problem.
"That is some GREAT SHIT!" Jimmy exclaimed as he exhaled. The trio were cheering as this was another big step in becoming men.
"You were never with me, and this never happened." Nick said very clearly.
"What do you mean?" Jimmy was confused.
"Because if you get caught you fuck faces are doing some time in the big house." Nick replied. He got on his skateboard and dipped.
The trio connected the dots that they just broke the law. The buzz kicked in and they stopped giving a fuck, and realized they were cool men.
"I feel different. Do you guys feel different." Jimmy said, his vision started to become distorted.
"Me too." Sheen replied.
"Me too." Carl also replied.
"Fuck it." The trio started to laugh uncontrollably.
"You guys hungry? Cause I'm starving!" Carl giggled.
"Fuck yeah." Jimmy and Sheen laughed.
They headed to the Candy Bar, staggering, and hungry for everything on the menu. They walked in, laughing so hard, the place was packed and Sam greeted them.
"What it'll be boys?" Sam said.
"Boys? We a'int boys bitch, we're men!" Jimmy shouted, slurring every word.
"You looking to have your fucking legs broken?" Sam questioned the trio who were crossfaded as fuck.
"Naw we just want everything on the menu!" The trio yelled. Sam looked at them weird.
"Then sit the fuck down, before I have to kill you." Sam wasn't fucking around
"Now let me get your shit." Sam said, pissed off at the doughy eyed retards.
10 SECONDS LATER.
The three annihilated every dish they had from burgers to rocky road sundaes. There was a mountain of dishes.
"Jesus Christ!" Sam yelled.
"WOO!" The group exclaimed.
Sam saw red. "GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY CANDY BAR! GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY CANDY BAR!"
Sam was so pissed that he threw the group to the curb.
"AND DON'T COME BACK, YEAH!" Sam yelled. The trio so crossfaded wasn't at all phased by getting thrown out of their favorite establishment.
"Alright men, lets FUCK SHIT UP!"The group walked down the moonlit road and walked back to the neighborhood.
To be continued...