Adrian – the lonely neo-nazi

Once upon a time there was a 17-year-old boy named Adrian. He lived at an orphanage, because when he was 13 he had gassed his Jewish adoptive parents TO DEATH in the car. He was a NEO-NAZI. His grandfather was Mengele and Adrian wanted to fulfill his HERITAGE and EXTERMINATE all the Jews. He was also a HIPSTER.

Not too far away lived Felicia, a 17-year-old girl. She loved the world and nature and therefore she worked as a volunteer for Greenpeace. A lot of people called her a HIPPIE, probably because of her rainbow-coloured wardrobe.

One day, at an internet forum, these two teenagers met. They talked everyday and got to know each other, and strangely enough, they became close FRIENDS. Felicia always saw the good in everyone and wanted to help Adrian. She thought she could CONVERT Adrian away from his neo-nazi ways.

About six months later Adrian wanted MORE than just friendship, and Felicia was so creeped out by that that she BLOCKED him. This made Adrian very BITTER.

In the middle of all this, there was a 17-year-old boy called Simon. He didn't know either of these two, even though he was classmates with Adrian. They had never even talked to each other. Until one day, when Adrian APPROACHED him. Simon had a reputation that he was good at COMPUTERS and Adrian wanted help with finding someone over the internet.

This was because Adrian MISSED Felicia and wanted to talk to her (and wanted to make her LOVE him).

Of course, Simon found her easily. Simon got a bit suspicious/freaked out when he saw Adrian's SMILE when he gave him the address though. The smile was very CREEPY, you see.

Therefore he decided to follow Adrian after SCHOOL. When they were in front of Felicia's house Simon witnessed the most unbelievable scene. Adrian behaved like a creeper against Felicia. It ended with Felicia throwing something SHARP at him and SLAMMED the door in his face, and LOCKED it.

Simon had only seen a little bit of Felicia, but he was already in love. He ran immediately home to his northern best friend KARTCHUCK to ask for advice. Kartchuck looked kind of uninterested while he was chewing on his ELK MEAT, but still gave him some advice. "Talk to her, bro."

Kartchuck had SPOKEN.

Just one week later Simon and Felicia were together and very happy, and one day Felicia decided to come visit Simon at his SCHOOL. She sat down at their table in the canteen along with Kartchuck and Katarina, who was their LESBIAN best friend. She was pretty HARDCORE. When Simon sat down he and Felicia started to cuddle.

At the other end of the canteen ADRIAN sat and SAW them. He was filled with an overwhelming ANGER. With his two FORKS (eating with knife and fork is too mainstream) in his hands he RAN to their table. At full speed he drove his forks into Simon's EYES, whereof Simon fainted from the PAIN.

Felicia got up and in her anger she hit Adrian in the head, with a plate full of SPINACH. To ANSWER that Adrian took a knife from Simon's plate and STABBED her in the stomach (aka he discovers his magical nazi powers and avada kedavra'r her). In her dying moment she whispers; "Adrian, you're tearing me apart". Then she dies.

The lesbian Katarina took this time to run over to the woodwork and get a SAW. She then directs the saw at Adrian (we told you she was hardcore!) (but not hardcore enough).

Adrian's knife finds its new victim when he STABS Katarina to death as well (aka nazi-magic).

Kartchuck witnesses the scene with his mouth OPEN. He decides to FLEE with the only survivor, Simon. He runs and decides to hide in the BASEMENT. Tragically enough, he TRIPS over his shoelace and FALLS down the stairs with Simon. In the process Simon loses all of his front teeth. He doesn't notice anything though since he's probably more UNCONSCIOUS now than before.

After this "INCIDENT" Adrian is taken to a MENTAL ASYLUM where he spends the rest of his life. Simon doesn't lisp anymore (but instead becomes DAMN BITTER and blind!) and Kartchuck continues being from northern Sweden. Felicia and Katarina get really NICE funerals, and eventually, life moves on (lol not really).

Le Fin