A/N: I have a deadly disease guys… It's called SNTS, or Shiny New Thing Syndrome. Sometimes, in my mind I'll see a scenario, maybe a conversation or just a moment, but that's it. I love dabbling in the fanfic world because the characters are already fully formed and beloved, and so it's not too far a stretch to put them in that moment. I should be writing One More Hook's next installment, yet this nugget has been bugging me. Bear with me. You should see a new chapter of OMH soon though! I Will Never Knock is inspired by the lyrics of Kevin Garrett's "Never Knock". It's a beautiful and haltingly slow song, give it a listen y'all!

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters, only the things I make them do. All character credit goes to the lovely Stephenie Meyer. I also do not own the song "Never Knock". If I did my name would be Kevin Garrett and I'd be rich. And a dude. And I'd have an awesome voice. Which I don't. I digress...

With a Raised Fist

EPOV

1:23 A.M.

I stand in front of an ordinary door, neutral in color and benign in nature, with a raised fist resting lightly on the surface. I could choose to knock. It would be so simple, all I would need to do is lift and lower my fist with enough force to draw her attention.

But I don't. I won't. I can't…

All too well, I can see how it plays out. I would actually knock on the surface before me, and begin to hear the surprised stirrings of an occupant. In the brief moments it would take you to reach the door, maybe you would wrap your robe around you tightly, check your hair in the mirror above the hall table, a frown marring your perfect features.

After checking the peephole, you would take a step back. I'm not a stranger, you know me. Or perhaps you knew me. You gasp, a quiet little intake of the air around you, surprised at my audacity.

The door would swing open, bringing with it a blast of frigid air. Maybe it's a forecast of things to come. The shock on your face quickly morphing into abject horror. Your past has just reared its beastly head.

I'm broken from my ruminating by the low vibrations of my cell phone. Without looking, I know who is on the line.

I step away from your door, briefly brushing the surface with my fingertips. I take in a deep breath, taking in your intoxicating scent with it. The teasing aroma of vanilla and sugar swim in my head, making me dizzy.

"Alice." I answer brusquely, already piqued that she would interrupt what's become a nightly ritual.

I hear her smothered sigh through the line before she speaks. "Edward, this is getting pathetic. Just knock already! I've told you the outcome of that decision a million times over. Yes, for just a moment it looks as if she's afraid-" she says, but I cut her off.

"Enough, Alice!" I whisper, my words clipped and angry. "Yes, you've told me this before. The truth is that she should be terrified of me. After what I did to her! I physically harmed the love of my existence, and she tried to explain the bruises away by her pale complexion. I can't go to her, because we're a danger to each other. She has no sense of self preservation, and I harmed the girl I should worship in my quest to 'get some'. God! What's wrong with me. No. I can't, Alice. I'm sorry." My voice is frantic and desperate to my own ears. I collapse against an alley wall, awash in a maelstrom of self-loathing.

"Edward Cullen! Get your head out of your ass and listen to me, for once in your life." Alice yells in that shrill voice that's always made me a touch fearful. "Yes, Bella looks scared in that vision, but it's not for the reasons you've convinced yourself of. You've just showed up out of the blue, on her doorstep, in the middle of night, looking like a cover model -thank you very much- and she's in her nightgown with bed hair. Not the good kind either. So of course she, as a normal human woman, would want to look fucking fantastic so her douchebag ex-fiancee would see what he was missing. Now, go knock on her door!" She shrieked.

I flinch, yanking the phone away from my ear. How could someone so tiny be so loud. "Alice," I sigh, resigned. "Even if what you say is true, I can't just do that to her. I swore that she would never have to see me again. Am I to go back on my promise?"

Alice groans loudly into the mouthpiece, making me draw back again. "Jesus Christ on a cracker, you're dense for a vampire! She's your mate, Edward! You two are meant to be together. Jazz and I fight on occasion, and we're going nearly 70 years strong. Trust me. She will be hurt, and angry -as is her right- but it's ingrained in the mating bond to be forgiving. I still see your future together bright and clear, but that could change. You know how my visions are, Edward. Just go to her."

I pinch the bridge of my nose in frustration, trying to reign in my impatience. "I just need time Alice. I need to...figure some things out, like what I'll say if she opens the door."

She sighs again, only this time, it's sadder. "At least we're making progress. Don't take long Edward, or you might be too late." With those words of wisdom, she disconnects the call, leaving me to my own devices.

A/N: This is the first part. I can honestly say that I have no idea how long this will be. I know that EB will end up together. That's a given! So, Edward is mopey, Alice is bossy and nosey, and Bella is dealing with her shit. I kinda envisioned this in snapshots, filling in the blanks is half the fun ;) Let me know if you liked it, if you didn't like it, or if you have feedback. Hit me! Muah 3