I don't own anything. Sadly the people who do are playing up the daddygate stupidness. LIZZINGTON FOREVER!
Let Me Go.
Chapter 1: Head or Heart.
Raymond is most certainly not a romantic type of person, in stark contrast to his Lizzie who is a hopeless romantic.
"I know you want to." She whispered millimeters away from his lips. Her warmed breath on his skin, her eyes fixated on his lips.
"Lizzie," He allowed his gaze to travel down to her lips momentarily.
"Do it." Her fingers crawled up the front of his chest.
He was stuck. Frozen. His heart was yelling at the top of its lungs "kiss her!" while his brain was running through the list of people who would try to kill her (if they weren't already) if they got wind of a Mr. Reddington having a romantic relationship.
He decided his brain was right, and extracted himself from her. "Elizabeth, I can't. You see..."
She knew where he was going, and decided to risk his possible anger with her and cut him off mid-sentence. "I do see." She humorlessly laughed. "You don't like me that way. It's okay. It really is. Could we forget about this moment?"
Her eyes were full of disappointment and her body language was ridged, but her tone of voice was strong, steady and even.
He knew Elizabeth Scott better than anyone in the world, her herself and he knew something was wrong. The Lizzie he knew would have been tearing up and stuttering. "Elizabeth, what is wrong other than me? You are acting... Different."
"I am acting like you."
Her words hit him like a ton of bricks. Why on earth would she want to be anything like him? "Elizabeth! No!" He hit the wall beside them in anger.
Liz winced and took a step back, but tried to maintain her honey-bear-don't-care attitude. "I am going to go to my room and get very very drunk." She sighed and attempted to turn away from him.
Before she could completely turn away he snatched her wrist and twisted her back around to face him again. She winced again.
"Do not do this to yourself. You are a sweet and caring, beautiful creature and I won't be able to look in a mirror if you change into me in anyway shape or form."
She cracked right then and there.
"I have tried for just about a year now to get you to notice me like I am a sexual being. I have watched you lead women in and out of your bedroom. I came to the conclusion that you don't see me anymore than a houseguest that has overstayed their welcome. And I would love to leave and have a life and feel pretty and desired by men again, but I can't because the second I do I am going to get shot or kidnapped."
A single tear trickled down her cheek, heart rate increased and her breathing became labored and heavy. Liz took in a few long calming breaths. Then looked up and locked eyes with him. "But another part of me is desperately in love with you."
"Lizzie,"
"Let me leave. Let me walk out that door. Let them get me. I have lost everything in this life that was anything of importance to me. You can go on the run again or live in Florence with Madeline, or continue with your list. It isn't you they want, it's me. Let me go." She whispered.
"I need to save you." He whispered back. "It's my sole purpose on this earth, to be your knight and shinning... Whatever."
"The princess in these stories usually end up with the knight-in-shinning-whatevers. I know you saved me from the fire and countless times after that. But in the end one of us is gonna get hurt." She pulled slightly at her wrists testing his hold, he gripped harder, determined to keep her there. "Let's look at it in two ways: way one, you die protecting me. I become depressed that the one person who I loved and was the only thing left I had died leaving me alone. And I lose my protection, don't say Dembe is always here, he is loyal to you not me and I wouldn't let him protect me. So result of way one: both dead.
Way two, I walk out that door and a bullet travels through my skull, effectively killing me. You can go do whatever you want. Without someone holding you down. It's perfect! I die leaving no one to mourn me, and you get your life back."
"Dammit Lizzie! No! That is never ever going to happen. Neither of them." His grip got tighter on her wrist the more his anger increased.
"Why?" Her voice was no more than a whisper, a quiet plead to let her die. In her mind she was dying anyways, no living family, no husband, and no children. All her friends had left her when Tom did, and in the FBI you learn not to become attached to your partners well knowing any of you can die at any given moment.
"I am in love with you. But I can't be. The second people find out about us they will used you against me and me against you. It may bring you happiness in the beginning, and hell me a lifetime of happiness. But it can not happen."
"How is kissing me any different than sleeping in the same house, or going out to dinner together. What maybe innocent and nothing romantic to you could look like we are together to anyone else." Liz looked up into his eyes, hoping, wishing, praying that he would agree with her.
"You are right." He released his grip her, and simultaneously turned away from her.
"Can I go? To be honest I know I made a mistake and I am mortified that I even acted upon these feelings." She laid her fingers over the door knob.
"Lizzie wait!" He yelled and ran over to her, and laid his hands on her waist. "I am so sorry, sweetheart."
Liz turned around in his arms, her back getting forced against the wall. "Make up your mind! I can't handle complicated right now! I want you! Do you want me in the same way or not!"
His lips crashed over hers. It was rough teeth against teeth and noses pressed together. She pulled away changing the direction of the kiss, making it smooth and languid.
After what felt like forever they released, both panting and trying to catch their breath.
"You were... That was... Amazing." She sighed breathlessly.
"Oh Lizzie." He grinned.
"I am going to get a drink."
"Oh no your not! You are going to go sit on the bed and wait for me to come back."
Red walked out of his bedroom, and went into the kitchen to pour himself a glass of scotch and her white wine.
He felt once again conflicted. Elizabeth is like a drug, she is so bad for you but oh god you need her. His brain was telling him how bad that decision he just made was and his heart was swooning over it. He was so mad he let his heart win out, Red grabbed the now empty glass of scotch and threw it across the room. The glass shattered against the wall.
Red made the final decision that he was going to leave for a few days, long enough for her to get mad and realize he lapse in judgement and for him to take time to think about how to move on from her.
He called Dembe to stay with Liz while he went to Florence to meet with Madeline. Maybe she could guide him in the right direction. Because he was at a loss.
Red left right then and there. Dembe didn't even arrive at the house before he left.
"Red!" Liz called out. "Red? You left me on the bed."
"Elizabeth, it looks like our friend Raymond has stepped out for a minute." A younger man said while walking up behind her. Slipping his arm around her waist and a knife up to her throat. "Me and you are going to go on a little trip."
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