Little does he know that he is being watched as well. And probably
for longer then he can even imagine.
I have been watching Eric Meyers since we were in prep school together. How he kept himself apart and got the idea set in his head that just because he didn't have money he was inferior and therefore had to prove himself.
But I never saw in that way, as inferior, in fact, I respected how he worked harder to get there then anyone else. I saw strength, courage, willpower and underneath it all, I also saw a fear of failure and a caring soul. It was the little thing, like hoe sweet talked to his birds and the small smile when I tried to include him in things. And those were the obvious ones. It was really the small things you really had to look for.
Now, as co-leader of the Silver Guardians, I can still see the strength, courage, and willpower, but the fear of failure is receding. I know being the Quantum Ranger has boosted his spirits and being leader of the best security force on the West Coast has helped immensely. And the good thing is his caring nature that had been buried for so long is now showing itself. He smiles more and seems happier.
Eric also thinks I don't notice his roaming eyes when he believes I'm not looking.
"Wes!"
I look up into the annoyed face of the trainee who I had been sparing with. I've been doing this way too often, tuning out with thoughts of him. I wish I could tell him that I think about him as much as he watches me. I'm such a coward.
"Wes, are you alright?"
That voice from behind me and the heavy hand on my shoulder was enough to make me jump. I turned quickly to see him behind me, the object of my thoughts, looking quite worried.
"I'm sorry."
I spoke softly to both him and the trainee.
"I just can't keep my mind on training today."
A small voice in the back of my head kept nagging me to tell him what I had been thinking about instead, but I couldn't obey. Not now.
He looked sternly over my shoulder at the trainee. "Go spare with Cadet Lewis." The trainee nodded and went off to join the trainee Eric had been working with, Then he turned his full attention to me, placing both comfortingly on my shoulders, concern melting his usually stern features.
"Wes, I'm worried about you. You've been out of it for a while now. Are you sure you're alright?"
He spoke softly, carefully, gently, full of more caring then I have ever heard from him. I wanted to melt in that gaze and tell him everything, how everything he feels and hides.I hide also. How I've noticed his penetrating gaze when he thinks I don't see. How my longing is not for a pink ranger but another red.
"It's okay Eric, I'm fine, really."
I don't know why I said that, and I immediately regretted it. His features became stern again with a forced smile.
"Alright. Why don't you go back to you're office? I think you've had enough training for today."
I opened my mouth to speak, but he had already turned away. I watched him go back to the trainees, acting as if nothing was wrong.
But I knew better.
With a heavy sigh, I turned to leave, dreaming of a day when one of us would come to our senses.
I have been watching Eric Meyers since we were in prep school together. How he kept himself apart and got the idea set in his head that just because he didn't have money he was inferior and therefore had to prove himself.
But I never saw in that way, as inferior, in fact, I respected how he worked harder to get there then anyone else. I saw strength, courage, willpower and underneath it all, I also saw a fear of failure and a caring soul. It was the little thing, like hoe sweet talked to his birds and the small smile when I tried to include him in things. And those were the obvious ones. It was really the small things you really had to look for.
Now, as co-leader of the Silver Guardians, I can still see the strength, courage, and willpower, but the fear of failure is receding. I know being the Quantum Ranger has boosted his spirits and being leader of the best security force on the West Coast has helped immensely. And the good thing is his caring nature that had been buried for so long is now showing itself. He smiles more and seems happier.
Eric also thinks I don't notice his roaming eyes when he believes I'm not looking.
"Wes!"
I look up into the annoyed face of the trainee who I had been sparing with. I've been doing this way too often, tuning out with thoughts of him. I wish I could tell him that I think about him as much as he watches me. I'm such a coward.
"Wes, are you alright?"
That voice from behind me and the heavy hand on my shoulder was enough to make me jump. I turned quickly to see him behind me, the object of my thoughts, looking quite worried.
"I'm sorry."
I spoke softly to both him and the trainee.
"I just can't keep my mind on training today."
A small voice in the back of my head kept nagging me to tell him what I had been thinking about instead, but I couldn't obey. Not now.
He looked sternly over my shoulder at the trainee. "Go spare with Cadet Lewis." The trainee nodded and went off to join the trainee Eric had been working with, Then he turned his full attention to me, placing both comfortingly on my shoulders, concern melting his usually stern features.
"Wes, I'm worried about you. You've been out of it for a while now. Are you sure you're alright?"
He spoke softly, carefully, gently, full of more caring then I have ever heard from him. I wanted to melt in that gaze and tell him everything, how everything he feels and hides.I hide also. How I've noticed his penetrating gaze when he thinks I don't see. How my longing is not for a pink ranger but another red.
"It's okay Eric, I'm fine, really."
I don't know why I said that, and I immediately regretted it. His features became stern again with a forced smile.
"Alright. Why don't you go back to you're office? I think you've had enough training for today."
I opened my mouth to speak, but he had already turned away. I watched him go back to the trainees, acting as if nothing was wrong.
But I knew better.
With a heavy sigh, I turned to leave, dreaming of a day when one of us would come to our senses.