Expectations

Chapter 1 of 1

A/N: I felt like Clair deserved a turn in the spotlight. I always wondered why they didn't make Clair a playable character instead of creating a new one in her father, Adray. But I've come to realize that Clair and Nel would be almost too similar. Even if Clair didn't fight as a clone of Nel, the same way Mirage was a clone of Cliff, their attitudes would have been nearly identical. Adray's bizarre personality was necessary to make him different from both women and still manages to flesh out Clair's character and to a lesser extent Nel's.

To the three people reading my other story: I was going to put this as a chapter in Finding Home, as Clair's first PoV. But this was originally intended as a one-shot. The style wouldn't fit a longer work. So a different version of this event will take place there, similar but not the same and from a different PoV.

Clair Lasbard swiftly walked down the main road from castle Aquaria. She broke away from the other travelers, walking down the gentle slope to the entrance of the royal gardens. She loved the royal gardens. They were not as grand as their name implied, set just outside the castle gates. Yet, they always offered a sense of solitude, of peace. Once inside you could almost forget the rest of the world existed.

She took a seat at a nearby bench. She was early. When was she last in the capitol? Probably not since escorting the queen safely home. That might have been 5 months ago, far too long. The restoration of Arias was all consuming. Sometimes she wondered why she bothered to keep a room in the castle, particularly with her family home so close. She supposed it was an honor to have those quarters dedicated to her. She should visit the room while she was here. At the very least a good dusting was in order.

According to rumor, Nel was back in Aquios, having just returned from her latest mission. The silver haired woman closed her eyes. Maybe it was best to steer clear of the castle for the time being. No. Clair sighed. Hiding from a problem would not solve it. She'd make time to speak to her friend. It had been too long and there was so much to talk about.

Like how they were falling in love with the same man.

In her defense, Clair had not seen it coming. Her first impression of Fayt Leingod was that he was younger, much younger than they'd expected of an engineer. Nel had filled her in with what she could. He was a skilled swordsman. Confident, maybe brash. And unfortunately, not inclined to help them.

She'd prepared a softer approach. For all of Nel's strengths, she was completely uncompromising when it came to her duty. The first step was to make Fayt and his "bodyguard" Cliff feel less like prisoners and more like guests, even if they were more prisoners than guests. She still regretted the way they had to be treated, the way she'd tried to manipulate them. To her relief, Fayt appeared to have forgiven them. More than forgiven.

He had turned her world upside down, asking about Nel's new mission. Then demanding to know where the exchange would take place. Furious. It was the only way she could describe him before he ran off to rescue Nel.

What a strange turn of events. Letting your best friend knowingly walk to her death, only to watch a man who was technically a prisoner risk his life to save her. From Nel's own reports the two of them weren't close at the time.

Apparently things could change.

There was gossip, before their return, before Nel disappeared off the face of the planet. Of course there was always gossip about something, especially in the castle. Rozaria had relayed how terrifying Nel had been when teased about her affections for Fayt. Clair knew better than to take everything Rozaria said at face value. The priestess was a hopeless romantic at heart and had quite the vivid imagination.

Rozaria wasn't wrong.

Nel had been acting differently, had for quite some time. Ever since rescuing Tynave and Farleen, Fayt became something…more than just her mission. That much Clair understood. If Nel was one thing it was loyal. By coming to her aid, by crossing that line, Fayt had bonded her to him.

Then Nel kept changing.

Nel was… softer. Still devoted to her mission, just less obsessed. More idealistic? A little. And hopeful. Gods, at times she was playful. More like the little girl who helped her steal sweets from the castle kitchens after their lessons. This Nel wanted more out of her life, talked about more than just her duty.

It figured a man would have to descend from the heavens for Nel Zelpher to change.

And Clair it seemed was no more immune to his charms. Rescuing Nel, Tynave, and Farleen, had definitely won her over. But that wasn't when things went so horribly wrong. Knowing what he meant to her best friend, it hurt her to have these feelings.

She suspects it was Arias. Rebuilding the city, side by side, that had caused this whole mess.

She'd been fond of Fayt, almost from the beginning and as they worked together it made sense for that fondness to grow. That was fine, expected. Then her feelings… changed. One afternoon she'd been working at her desk when she heard him enter the manor, his quick confident stride, and… she felt happier, before he'd even reached her office door.

Fayt was handsome. She'd like to pretend she hadn't noticed, that she'd been too busy to give it any real thought.

He radiated strength, not that the people around her were weak but the years of war had taken their toll. Fayt was confident, determined, eager to conquer the next challenge. By comparison her own people were committed, reliable... if resigned to the task at hand. He was passionate where they were cynical and where the people around her stood by their duty, he stood by his beliefs.

It was easy to believe Fayt could change the world.

A crush? It felt silly to say. She couldn't remember her last one or if there was a last one. If only it had stopped there… but no, Clair Lasbard was far too professional to be bothered by a simple crush. It was nothing a disciplined mind could not ignore. So she forced herself to work alongside him, late into the night, ignoring the tightness in her stomach. She refused to acknowledge the way her eyes lingered on him when he was outside working with the other craftsmen. She chastised herself for every idle daydream at her desk.

And then her treacherous heart made it perfectly clear, her disciplined mind had no say in the matter.

He'd been working on one of the city walls. Leading the others, using some advanced knowledge he probably took for granted his entire life. The sun was setting, a long day and hot. They were pouring the last panel of a strange white material, letting it set. After a thorough inspection, he'd climbed down the scaffolding. Propping himself up against one of the posts, he'd leaned over wearily, celebrating a job well done with the others.

He'd heard her approach, her heels on the newly paved road, completed just six weeks prior. He'd turned to her, smiling, not to brag or seek approval. A sense of accomplishment and wanting to share it. By nightfall the material would set. The wall would be complete. A milestone of the city, their city.

She'd meant to congratulate him, to thank him for all his efforts. That would have been normal. His knowledge had made so much possible. His efforts, working alongside the others each day, had made them happen. She'd stepped closer to him…and said nothing. Instead, they stood silently, basking in the moment together, watching the sun slip beyond the horizon. She remembers stealing glances at him, the peaceful but tired look on his face. She'd reached out, brushing away the strands of hair that fell over his green eyes.

Only later did she realize the workers around them had kept their distance, letting them have their moment together. Soon there would be rumors, if there weren't already. People were already taking notice. She'd worked so closely with him for months, relied on him like no one else.

It didn't matter.

After that, she'd taken to walking the perimeter of the city every few days, speaking to the workers. It was important to both see their progress and be seen. If that meant more time speaking to Fayt, it couldn't be helped.

And now she waited, in the gardens, trying to have another "moment" with him.

Weeks ago, he'd been called upon to return to the castle while she remained behind in Arias, overseeing the reconstruction. When the opportunity came to see him on one of her rare visits to Aquios she'd pounced on it. She'd asked to speak with him, to talk about "work."

She wasn't made of stone. She was allowed to have romantic interests. It didn't make her feel any less guilty.

There was a time when she would have chided Nel, gently. Well…not exactly gently. She'd have used her exasperated and superior tone (the one that always drove Nel crazy) to push her friend in the right direction, to make her grasp Fayt's heart.

But now…

Now she hopes Nel will let it go. Because if Clair is certain of anything, it is that Nel was and remains the most important person to Fayt on the planet.

She doesn't know all the details of their adventure. Truth be told, she knows very little. Nel had kept so much of it secret. Her friend must have had her reasons. She knew Nel had nearly been killed coming to his aid. Nel had downplayed the incident. But one night she had asked Fayt and the far off look in his eyes spoke volumes. Everything about their relationship: meeting in the middle of a war, risking their lives for each other, being pulled apart by their different worlds, and somehow ending up together despite all odds... it sounded like an epic romance.

Nel left her world behind to follow Fayt into the stars. Fayt left the stars behind to follow Nel home.

And now 4 months have passed since they had returned to her world. Since returning from facing an enemy the likes of which she can't imagine. What in the gods' name was Nel waiting for? Some part of her wonders (hopes), if Nel isn't going to make a move, why doesn't she step aside?

Nel absolutely will not step aside.

Clair knows her friend well and she suspects Nel's hesitance is not by design. Nel Zelpher is not shy, usually. Nel has never felt like this before, never been in love before. Her feelings for Fayt and the power they have over her… Nel is nervous, perhaps scared, and uncertain how to proceed. So Nel is moving cautiously. There is no rush. Fayt has chosen to remain here on Elicoor. The war is over, and if their world isn't safe it is a little safer.

Nel has made one glaring miscalculation.

Clair cannot know what their life was like traveling among the stars. She does know that while on Elicoor, Nel was never far from Fayt's side. All he saw of their world, he saw with her. That is no longer the case. Since her return Nel has thrown herself back into her duty, micromanaging her very capable staff. And while Nel takes on trivial assignments, refusing to delegate even the smallest of tasks, Fayt has not been idle. When not working in Lady Elena's research department, he works tirelessly with her in Arias. He is making a life for himself on Elicoor, forming bonds, and making friendships. Clair hears the whispers from the women in her division. Fayt has many…desirable qualities. Some, like herself, make excuses to interact with him. Nel doesn't realize the threat to her position, doesn't see all her potential rivals.

Her best friend first among them.

Clair glanced at the main road. Fayt, normally so conscientious about being on time, was running late. She didn't mind. There was a lot to work through. Nel's feelings, Fayt's feelings, and her own doubts.

Then there were her father's actions…

It wasn't the first time he'd pestered her to find a husband. But to do it so crudely, offering her hand like a cheap carnival prize, and to Fayt. The silver haired woman clenched her fists, felt the heat rising on her face, grateful for the privacy of the gardens. Embarrassment didn't do it justice.

By the way…are you seeing that girl, Nevelle's daughter…Nel?

As stubborn, reckless, and insensitive, as her father was even he had picked up on the undeniable bond between Fayt and Nel. He was not alone in thinking Fayt had stayed on Elicoor for Nel. Clair was convinced that was closer to the mark than either Fayt or Nel wanted to admit. Her father was right about one other thing.

She wouldn't say no.

Clair has only just managed to compose herself when she hears him jogging up the main road. Catching sight of her, a relieved smile spreads across his face. He's quick to apologize. The magistrate detained him. Lasselle. That explains a lot, his late arrival and the tension still radiating off him. He asks if she's been waiting long. She has. She says she hasn't.

Fayt asks if she'd like to walk. Yes, she would. The entrance of the royal gardens are not far from the main thoroughfare. A little more privacy would be welcome. Even if they are here to officially talk about work… these moments are too precious, too personal, to allow onlookers. She loves the gardens and can't imagine a better way to spend the day than touring them with Fayt.

So they walk and as they walk the tension slowly rolls off of him. He is happy to see her. He says so, openly and without hesitation. He asks about the reconstruction, how it's fared in his absence, and assures her he will be leaving shortly to assist them. She already knew, had learned of it earlier that day, but smiles and says she is happy to hear it.

Absorbed in their conversation, the other patrons go unnoticed. Some are simply cutting through the gardens to reach the castle. Others have come seeking solace of their own. More than a few watch them curiously as they pass.

Fayt comments on being worried about her, that she is pushing herself too hard. His tone is light but there's real concern there. It warms her. He has witnessed her tendency to work late into the night firsthand. When it comes to Arias, he has seen her at her worst and done his best to help her through it. She thinks it might have been his strength of will and unwavering support that doomed her to this path.

Fayt jokes about protecting her. She pretends to be offended. She is after all, a skilled warrior in her own right. She tells him as much. He pauses thoughtfully, as if not sure if he should believe her. She swats his arm playfully.

The thought of Fayt protecting her, of wanting to protect her, is pleasing.

She crosses her arms with a soft huff and walks "away" from him. She stops before long, sitting at the nearest bench. There's an art to letting him "catch" to her.

He takes the space next to her, leaving most of the bench empty. He lifts his head, staring into the leaves of the massive tree casting them in darkness.

"We could have gardens like these in Arias."

She would love that. The smile he gives her suggests he knows. They discuss the possibilities and where the project would fall in the seemingly endless list of work to be done.

It's too easy for her to be around him, to let the hours slip by.

And they do, the hours, they slip traitorously by. She has other duties to attend to. They both do. But she's enjoying this too much. If sleep heals the body, perhaps good company heals the soul. It's been weeks since Lady Elena requested his help and drew him away from Arias. From her.

When the talk of work finally wanes she asks a more personal question.

He'd been asked many times why he stayed on Elicoor. She's heard all his answers, more than once. It's a beautiful world to make a fresh start. There are people who mean a lot to him. He can make a difference here. All good answers, all long practiced.

She has always wondered where he disappeared to after asking for sanctuary. She asks him innocently, both out of curiosity and to prolong their time together. It's a simple question with a not so simple answer. There is so much of his people she does not know. Fayt is undaunted and patiently explains such details as they arise.

And her heart aches for him.

The battle had not gone well for his people. Yet many survived, many worlds survived. They lived on many worlds! His father was gone but his mother and something of his old life remained. He had planned to spend a month seeking answers, preparing for his new life on Elicoor, and saying goodbye.

Most had not approved of his choice. Some tried to talk him out of it, to return to the Federation. But he couldn't go back. That world was forever lost to him. He describes forces that she doesn't know or completely understand. One thing is clear from the way he speaks, he needs this, to talk about it. It's cathartic.

She grips both of his hands, stares into his troubled green eyes and the words come spilling out of him. The nature of his powers. His fear of being seen as weapon, of being used. He confides in her and she drinks it in greedily. She feels selfish and superior. They are secrets he has trusted only to her.

A part of her whispers that Nel need only ask.

But Nel has never asked, when she so easily could, when the burden weighs on him so heavily. With that thought her resolve hardens. She's quick to act, to reinforce this new closeness, assuring him that he can always talk to her. She releases one of his hands, holds fast with the other, and traces her fingers along his jaw.

He closes his eyes and takes a shaky breath. When he opens them he looks tired but his eyes are clear. His voice is low, little more than a whisper, as he thanks her, confirming how badly he needed to talk to someone.

It's growing late. Later than either had planned. As they make their way out of the gardens he asks where she is headed. She is due in the castle for another meeting. He is expected in the fabrication room. She notes Lady Elena is probably growing impatient at his absence. His lips quirk upwards slightly but his green eyes are laughing. They walk back together wrapped in a very comfortable silence.

It's Nel's choice to proceed so slowly with Fayt, to put him at the bottom of her list of priorities. But Nel's claim on Fayt is not absolute. If her friend's indecision has left room in his heart for someone else, Clair will not make the same mistake. She will seize the ground and fight to defend it.

The decision made, she feels a burden lifted.

She never noticed a second pair of green eyes, narrowed in fury, watching their every move.

A/N: Not what you were expecting? I couldn't help but think about how both Nel's and Adray's endings with Fayt (including the scenes from the bonus dungeon) tend to overlap. For example, in both paired endings Fayt and Clair spend time together talking in the gardens, off screen. In Nel's ending with Fayt it's enough to make her extremely jealous. Of course, in Nel's bonus scene she and Fayt end up in a serious relationship. But in Adray's bonus scene he calls Fayt out on that garden scene, indicating Clair is interested in him. Adray also points out not to worry about the women in his past and mentions Nel. Hell, in the first scene of the Adray ending he asks if Fayt is seeing Nel and explains that he thought that was Fayt's reason for staying on Elicoor. Relatively, that's a lot of information to work with.