Disclaimer: I don't own Bones or the song "First Time" by Lifehouse
Holding My Breath
Dr. Brennan sat in the small lounge of the upper level or the anthropology lab. She gazed out over the edge, at the lab, her tables, all the things she had worked so hard to achieve. Everything was quiet. Everyone had gone home for the evening, leaving her to her thoughts. She thought of Angela and her rocky love life, Zach in prison, and Booth, her best friend, currently out with Cam their M.E. She sighed and closed her eyes allowing her head to thump against the back of the sofa.
It was nights like this particular one that she regretted herself and her mannerisms. Tonight they seemed more of a hindrance than a help. Her personality was great for analyzing and solving mysteries, but when it came to fun, she couldn't let go and be content. She wanted the easy, flirty attitude of Angela, or the more open and to the point one of Cam. At that moment she wanted to be anyone but herself, preferably someone normal.
She felt the couch dip next to her and a warm presence brushing her skin, shoulder to knee. She opened her eyes to see Booth resting beside her, copying her position. She studied him for a moment. He felt her stare and opened one eye.
"You alright, Bones?" He asked. She nodded but he knew something was off. He put an arm around her shoulders and she leaned against him, her head in the crook of his shoulder and neck. It wasn't often that she needed some form of comfort, as she could compartmentalize easily, but it happened.
It struck her then, that being with Booth in that moment felt more right than anything else in a long time. The thought made her stiffen for a moment and hold her breath, hoping he wouldn't notice.
"You alright?" He asked again. She nodded against his chest. It was terrifying knowing that she was in love with her partner. She could feel him looking at her. She turned her head up to look at him. She wasn't very talented when it came to reading facial expressions. What she saw in his eyes was what she felt in her heart, but was unable to express coherently. She felt like she was drowning in his gaze. She felt like she had been holding her breath for a lifetime, waiting for him.
"Me too, Bones." He said softly and pulled her closer into his embrace."
Looking at you, holding my breath
For once in my life, I'm scared to death
I'm taking a chance, letting you inside
I'm feeling alive all over again
As deep as the sky that's under my skin
Like being in love, she says, for the first time
Maybe I'm wrong, I'm feeling right
Where I belong tonight
Like being in love to feel for the first time.