As Free As My Hair

Big Time Rush fanfic

Summary: [Kames] What if James' "perfect" hair, wasn't so perfect after all?

Author's Note: Well, this has been sitting in my un-posted folder for quite some time. When I got a PM for Semi Official BTR One Shot Day, February 6th (as told to me by JaylaHeart) I decided I might as well post it. Contribute and help myself. Wow, I'm selfish. Anyways it's just a short little fic. Rated T for mentions of bullying because HOMOPHOBIA IS WRONG! Well anyways... ONWARD!

Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush (the band or the show), nor do I own the song, Hair by Lady Gaga.

Whenever I dress cool,
My parents put up a fight
And if I'm a hot shot,
Mom will cut my hair at night
And in the morning I'm short of my identity
I scream Mom and Dad
Why can't I be who I wanna be?

Normal POV

James stood in front of the mirror. 'It's coming back...' James thought to himself. He heard a knock on the door. "Just a minute!" he called out. He placed his "perfect" hair on his head and adjusted it. He fixed it in the mirror before opening the door to have Kendall rush in and push him aside throwing a simple "Gotta pee!" over his shoulder. Unknowingly, James had left out his wig care shampoo. [A/N: I know it probably isn't any different but for the purpose of this story it is.] He usually carried it to his room and had a closet of sorts for all of his stuff.

James smiled a little, forgetting about the shampoo, before returning to the living room. He noticed Carlos and Mrs. Knight in the kitchen, cooking. Logan was studying in the living room. 'No place for me...' James thought for a moment, but pushed it to the back of his mind. "Hey, um, I'm gonna go down to the pool. I'll see you guys later."

James' POV

"It's raining." Logan stated, as if I hadn't realized.

"I know." I replied, already halfway out the door. I made the small trip to the pool, glad it was raining. Because when it was, no one bothered me. In fact, it was like no one noticed me. I smiled at that and entered the Lobby Bathroom. I shrugged off the wig, tucking it into a bag, wiped off my make-up (for facial effects, mind you), and applied the sunglasses-effect. No one would look at me, let alone want to talk to me. I exited the bathroom and trekked to the pool, almost laughing at the comforting pitter-patter in the pool.

I breathed a calm sigh and took my seat in a lounge chair. It was wet, but by now, so was I. Some might say this was stupid and I would have a cold by tomorrow, and they were probably right, but I didn't care.

I've had enough
This is my prayer
That I'll die living just as free as my hair

Normal POV

Kendall exited the bathroom, a bit... flustered. He held the wig hair care bottle in his hand. "Um... guys? Where is James?" Kendall asked the other two.

"He said he was going to the pool." Logan answered. Kendall looked out the window for a moment before Mrs. Knight approached her son.

"What is that stuff?" She asked Kendall, seemingly snapping him out of his daze.

"It's er... wig hair care?" he answered dumbly. Mrs. Knight, as well as the two other boys had a look of surprise on their faces.

"But... it was so... real... and..." Carlos said. Mrs. Knight looked like she was about to cry. Logan looked like he was calculating the mistake in his mind, which was so Logan, by the way. Kendall stood amidst all of them, looking lost.

"I'm gonna go talk with him. Maybe it's a mistake or- or maybe he's holding it for someone or something." Kendall offered, reassuring himself, more than the others. The others nodded, frozen in place. He slowly traveled out of the apartment and down the stairs to the lobby.

Outside, he saw it. He saw the proof. It was James, Kendall could tell, because he was the only one out there, wearing exactly the same clothes as when he left. Kendall marched out to him, clutching onto the bottle.

I just want to be free, I just want to be me
And I want lots of friends that invite me to their parties
I don't wanna change,
And I don't wanna be ashamed
I'm the spirit of my Hair
It's all the glory that I bare
I am my Hair!

James' POV

I felt a presence to the left of me, but I passed it off as my imagination. Until I heard his voice. "J- James? I hate to disturb you but, I just want to know... the truth, I guess." It was Kendall. I opened my eyes, my tears falling, but going unnoticed beneath the rain.

"I guess I can start where it began," I started. "A year before I met you guys..."

Story

I had entered North Dakota South District High School, like every other weekday, except I knew how special that day was. My "deadline" was up. If I didn't have my personal bully, Francis', paper done, he would tell the whole school I was gay (and would happen to leave out he found out when he kissed me).

Unfortunately, that was due the day before. I walked into the school to find a (quite poorly) drawn penis on my locker, followed by a pie to the face, a slushy to my coveted hair. Oh, and how could I leave out my wonderful meeting with the principal about how I keyed 'Homophobe' into the side of his car. He (and I) really didn't like that.

By then, I was a wreck. I spent the first three hours crying hysterically in the unused faculty bathroom in the East Wing. I had to break in and re-lock the door. By the end of the day (which had many repeats of the morning in it, including a teacher kicking me out of his room because I was a distraction. I ended up leaving after that happened.

When I got home, no one was home, so I shaved my long blonde hair and tore up half my clothes. I wrote all the hateful words they said on my white wall in bright red lipstick (which was actually my mother's). By the time my mother got home, she too was crying hysterically. For me. She got thousands of hateful e-mails, and she even got a threatening letter from one of her co-workers.

By the time the day was over, we both had shed enough tears to fill a gallon jug. We established we would disconnect all attachments to North Dakota and leave to another state. That night we packed and left by the next morning. We stopped along the way so we could officially leave North Dakota behind. We also bought me a new wardrobe of clothes, and found a wig shop. I transferred from that school, which conveniently already had all my papers prepared.

My mother's parents lived in Minnesota so we tried there first. Unfortunately, her parents didn't have room there, but they helped us find a nice house not too far away.

End Story

"And you know the rest. So, hate me yet?" I asked, afraid of his reaction. Imagine my surprise to find warm lips and hot tears. I felt his hands run through my short blonde hair. "Kendall?" I gasped when we separated.

"Yea? Oh, well I'm sad for you, and- and I love you?" He said, as if that explained everything. I laughed heartily.

"I love you too, Kendall." I whispered.

I've had enough
This is my prayer
That I'll die living just as free as my hair

End

A/N: Well I don't really like this one, (because I rushed the ending and the length is stretched and I don't like Kames in the first place) but meh, I thought I'd post it. Like I said, it's been sitting in my un-posted folder for awhile now. Well please review anyways!