Hello.
A/N St. Fire's Elmo, you're a hairy, warty, dirty, sweaty, big, fat, itchy, chair-ruining butt of an ass.
End o' A/N
Dawn frowned, silently glaring at the crap-smelling piece of shitling-infested land named Hoenn. Seeing lasses play volleyball with Electrode corpses, triathletes pelt Taillows with nipple lasers and robot whales wrestle armless mutant grapes filled her with so much hate, she punched the Electrode through the triathlete's stupid forehead, making all robot whales' dickholes explode and the shrapnels pierce mutant grapes, making them perpetually retarded. She caught the explosions with her mind powers then consumed them, becoming stronger.
Serena overheard Dawn's shitty wimp-out excuse for a rampage and arrived on an Acro Bike made of Gardevoir elbows alone. She kicked a steel cowboy boot right through Dawn's freckly face, causing all errors to turn into bread which made the universe crash and reset. When it rebooted, Misty was sitting on Ash's face and eating succubus virgin blood krutons while ravaging demon minds with a screwdriver which completely killed 'em all in a mysterious, mind-boggling way.
Yikachu punched out of his flatulent grave and flew out on wings of arctic ice, wielding in his arm an antique sword, The Paradox. It was shaped like insanity itself, a single glance upon it would make any mortal act like a tennis ball. Yikachu shrieked and struck the Earth with his mighty weapon, causing a hypersonic bass drop so hard and filthy, everyone's armpit hairs were set ablaze and Cupid's testicles exploded in the face of Hades who was eating him out from behind while the whole Olympus masturbated to the sinful, eye-melting act.
Serena was so enraged, her body started shining and transformed into a creature of absolute, unimaginable power; Ultra Serenade. The atoms of her body became fiery galaxies, her thoughts became atomic explosions, her eyes became laser tornado dragons, her words became acid made of pure hate and her arms became chainsaws so evil, they killed even gods!
Ultra Serenade rushed and tried to deftly emasculate Yikachu with her godkillsaw, but he effortlessly blocked with The Paradox!
"EEMPO$1BUL!" Ultra Serenade screamed, exaggerating surprise. "The only thing that can block by blow is The Paradox, a wicked blade forged of filthy lust!"
Yikachu replied with a silent smile. The Paradox is forged from the erections of jesters, doused in the vaginal fluid of gargoyles and shaped with a hammed made of rage alone, so it was just as powerful as her weapon of mass deistic dismemberment.
Ultra Serenade was fed up with this shit. She flew towards Jupiter, ate it down for no reason at all, then flew back to Yikachu and used her Level 54 Steel/Dragon/Bug type signature move: Chew-Out, making him simultaneously suffer from all status conditions possible. Yikachu healed it by thinking about boob quasars, then roared thunderbolts made of frustrated thoughts, setting her leg on chemical fire and ruining her make-up. That's mean. Even BAD girls can look good anytime they want, dude.
Ultra Serenade was so fucking pissed, her anger mark was visible from cosmos. She kicked hard into Yikachu's gut and his eye popped as he puked angry rainbows made of doors and pooped raw titanium ores. Yikachu punched Ash Ketchum, then countered by summoning meteors made of the very first dozen of dinosaur diapers and raining them down exactly on Ultra Serenade, leaving a dent on her divine satanic armor and making her sneeze. The nasal blast skinned Yikachu, baring his true self to the world. He was Donald Bush Obama McLincolnovich XIV!
Donny's ocular ducts swelled up and pulsed with alien power, gaining a light made of shaved chickens and misogyny. He screamed and launched a violent barrage of lasers made of bananas from his tear-holes into the blood-tinted skies, distorting the space so much it turned all clouds into heroine ice-cream made of petrified , which hailed down upon the pitiful rock called Earth, making all bigots' fingers explode and the bones stabbed their eyes, turning them into laughing chocolate! Yikachu teleported into his bathroom with some of that flavor-scented matter, then took a shower while masturbating with his washcloth covered in foam from the funny fluid while The Smiths' last album played in the background.
Yikachu sighed as he relaxed, the warm liquid calming his stress down. He didn't give a diving fuck about Ultra Serenade. She would wait for him if she wants a battle. She even could fuck herself with The Paradox, for as much as he was concerned.
14,42 months later, Ultra Serenade made a living by hunting giant unicorns with manual shavers and devouring their digestive organs while galactic imps gave supermassive black holes bloody creampies.
FIN...