Just a little short something that popped into my head today. My friend Donna has a son that says some of the craziest things. He was a bit of inspiration for this.

"Uncle Tony?"

Tony turned from the grill and looked down to see Michelle's nephew J.D.

"Hey little man. Whatcha need?" Tony turned back to the grill and started turning over the burgers he was cooking.

"Didya know Aunt Michelle is having sex?"

If the question hadn't shocked him so much, Tony would have had a flash of male pride at how far he was able to fling the burger he had been turning at the time. He barely noticed the dog making a beeline for the patty that landed in the middle of the lawn.

"What?! Right now?" As soon as it left his mouth, Tony regretted it.

J.D just looked up at his aunt's boyfriend with a confused look on his face. Tony looked frantic. Did he do something wrong?

"I don't know. Maybe she is. But Ben from next door said she had to be having sex."

Tony took in a deep breath and calmed down. Jesus, had he really thought Michelle's nephew had caught her cheating? And at a cookout they were hosting. He chuckled and bent down toward the boy.

"He said that huh? How old is this Ben?"

"15. He said that someone that looks like her had to be…uh…" He looked like he was trying to remember exactly what phrase was used. "…'getting it' on a regular basis. Does she Uncle Tony? Does she get sex on a regular basis? Because Ben says that you could die if you didn't."

It was all he could do to hold in the laugh that threatened to burst out of him. There was no way he was going to explain to Michelle's 7 year old nephew that sure, she "got it" on a regular basis. Hell, she got it so much it could possibly make her immortal based on Ben's assessment.

"Don't worry about it kid. I got it under control." Tony ruffled his hair and stood back up to go back to the grill.

"Ok good because I don't want her to die or nuffin'. You'll make sure she gets it enough right?"

Tony turned back to him and smirked down at his worried face. "Trust me on this one J.D. I won't let ya down."

The little boy grabbed him around the knees and squeezed. "Thanks Uncle Tony!"

Tony turned back to the grill and had just started re-flipping the burgers when he heard J.D. shout "Don't worry everyone, Uncle Tony says he'll make sure Aunt Michelle has lots of sex!"

This time he just stood and watched the dog as it helped itself to the second lawn patty of the day.