CHALLENGE:

Challenge issued by "Reptilia28" - Originally on Portkey(dot)org verbatim:

A funny little challenge I just came up with. It's a comical twist on the time-travel category.

STORYLINE:

*Harry is killed at 17 during a fight with Voldemort. He's sent to his Death's office (explained later) and finds out that this isn't the first time that this has happened.

Me: I had mine happen when he was 15 instead of 17, and it isn't Voldemort who caused it.

*Harry's Death (who can have a human name) is mad at his arrival. Apparently, people dying before their time is a black mark on the various Deaths' records, and Harry is getting perilously close to getting this particular one fired.

Me: not really done per say but eh.

*When Harry asks what was supposed to have happened, Death goes off on a rant saying how he was supposed to have killed Voldemort, found his soulmate ("Some Granger girl...") and lived to be a centennial age. But since Harry keeps getting into life-threatening situations for one reason or another, he keeps dying before that happens. Harry is surprised about the soulmate part.

Me: sorta done, gave him three other soul mates.

*Death gives Harry a paper to sign that allows him to retain his memories (the previous times, he wasn't given this option for some reason). Harry is deposited to a previous time of the writer's choosing.

Done

*Eventually, Harry gets it right. He kills Voldemort, gets the girl, and lives to a ripe old age of whatever. And Death doesn't get fired.

Me: interestingly with mine I think the lifespan will end up being a moot point.

REQUIREMENTS:

*Harry had to have died at least three times before this one.

*The memory keeping contract must be included.

*Death must refer to Hermione as "some Granger girl" when Harry's soulmate turns up in his rant.

*Obviously, must be H/Hr.

*Have fun.

OPTIONAL:

*Dumbledore's manipulations can be a factor in Harry's premature demises.

This is an HP challenge I found, I've taken the idea and Applied it to Naruto though.

Chapter 1 Meeting with Nil

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Naruto blinks as he looks around confused. he's currently sitting in a chair, whose solid back looks like flames.

A large fireplace behind the desk roars with flames and every now and then a scream can be heard from it.

On a wall is a picture of a Native American village, confusing Naruto as he had never seen anything like it before. Next to that picture, strangely, is a picture of a boy with yellow skin, a red shirt, blue shorts, and is resting a scythe on his back.

Underneath that one is another boy, but this one has normal white skin, though the only part of him that can be seen is part of his face, as a hooded jacket covers everything else including his mouth.

His attention is suddenly on the fireplace as the fire expands, the screams getting louder before a figure comes out of it.

Naruto watches as a Native American boy, about 10, comes out of the fire, he wears a vest with no undershirt, and black pants.

The boy carries a scythe and a folder, he sets the weapon against the wall next to the fireplace and walks to the chair behind the desk. The ninja's eyes widen as the boy suddenly ages to 17.

Calmly the now young man glances at him. "greetings Naruto. I'm Nil and you've been an interesting case." "where am I?"

"oh your dead."

Naruto gulps, "dead?"

"oh yes in fact this is your time dieing. Not very good. Your usual Reaper has been fired and I'm to take his place."

"what? Why can I remember dieing before then?"

"because usually your memory is erased. Your file tells me that you are supposed to defeat a couple Uchihas and after getting married to some Hyuuga girl become Hokage."

Naruto's jaw drops, "you mean I do get to become Hokage… wait Hyuuga girl? I want Sakura."

Nil looks at the folder and shakes his head. "no sorry. According to this if you were with that girl, then you'd die the night before you were to become Hokage. Her strength would be too much for you and while eating her out she'd crush your head with her legs upon orgasm."

at Naruto's flabbergasted look Nil continues, "there are also a number of other things that would end in your demise if you tried to be with her. Each of them happening before you become Hokage. With the Hyuuga girl though, you'd live to be about 100. Hmm says here some possibility of you accepting some CRA thing. In which case you'd have more wives."

Naruto blinks, "eh?"

"don't know, as it's only a possibility only hair colors are available. But anyway not important. What is important is what's going to happen now."

"um before you tell me, can you say how I had died before?"

"no problem. Your lucky though, your deaths didn't start until after you became a ninja. Not before, I'd be seriously ticked off if people had killed you before. Now then your first death was on your first non D-rank mission. When you saw Haku move to take the death blow for her sensei you pushed her out of the way and got killed yourself. Before you died from your wound however she kissed you in thanks."

Naruto blinks, "what but Haku's a boy."

"no according to these files, Haku was a girl. In fact if she and you had survived, then the Hyuuga would have either learned to share you or she and Haku would kill each other over you. Weird, these things don't usually go into that much detail with other people in the person's life. Oh wait I see, it predicts that if that happened you'd kill yourself."

Naruto sweat drops. "anyway, death number two. Oh this one's good, you accidentally, while running from pursuers, crashed through a roof. Inside the Hyuuga girl was bathing, you got an eyeful and died from blood loss with the ensuing nosebleed."

"wouldn't the fox have healed me?"

"no she had a nosebleed as well and was unable to help."

"oh I bet he would… wait SHE?"

"yes the Kyuubi is female. Demon's can change their voices at will. They seem to think male voices are scarier, probably because men have been known to be more evil then women in general. Though women do have their moments, I should know. I've helped several in my line of work as I work for downstairs."

"downstairs?"

Nil gestures to the fireplace, "I don't refer to the place or it's counterpart by name. the group of people I came from believed in nature. There was only one place we would go when we died, the great hunting grounds in the sky."

Naruto pales as another yell of pain emits from the fireplace, now understanding where it connects to.

"if I worked for upstairs this place wouldn't be so 'dark' in arrangement and that would be an open doorway into what would seem clouds."

when Naruto nods his understanding Nil continues. "number three, one of the Uchihas you need to kill, killed you at the Valley of the End."

"kill him?"

"yes, he would only end up killing you or your loved ones if you don't. further more, I have no idea how you consider him a friend."

Nil shakes his head. "course I've seen worse. This one kid was 'friends' with another who was only jealous that he was famous. He tried to get himself in the spotlight as much as he could, and he tried to claim the girl his friend loved. For the sole reason of having something that his famous friend couldn't, even tried to use a love potion on the girl."

"what?"

"don't worry about it, it's in another world. Just be glad I'm not seeing any in depth sexual training for the women."

Nil snorts, "I know female ninjas need to be seductive to do some of their missions but actually having to have sex on those missions. No way, too much like prostitutes for me. Don't get me wrong working for where I do I love my share, but ninjas are assassins not whores."

"can we get back to me please?"

"sure. Four was another Hyuuga. He found out you had accidentally peeked on his daughter during a mission and killed you, believing you peeked on purpose."

"huh, I've never peeked on Hinata?"

Nil takes a closer look, "she was the waterfall girl you saw." as Naruto gapes at the thought, Nil continues.

"the last time, why you are here now, occurred while trying to fight with someone named Pein."

"so why are you telling me all this if I'll just forget again?"

"because I've been told to let you remember everything this time. As well as give you a couple of gifts."

"what kinda gifts?"

"well first your healing rate is higher then normal correct?"

"yea?"

"how about I increase it further? To heights were no one would be able to kill you."

"really?"

"yes, I know of someone who fought another who could think people out of existence. He killed that person, while they were trying to do so to him. But any damage done to heal healed as he walked towards them. His skin disintegrated, but regrew just as fast. he also had metal bones, and three claws he that came from his knuckles. He was a very powerful man. I will give you all his abilities, and I will also give you full control of the Kyuubi."

"awesome!"

"yes, now then I'll be sending you back to the day you graduated. I plan on having a friend of mine approach the Hokage, and force him to change teams. I will not have you being trained with the Uchiha you must kill. Or that pink haired woman that'd cause you to die before you become Hokage."

"what about my new healing and metal bones?"

Nil's response is just to stare at him, "alright that does it. I'll now also make it where every time you try to think of that woman like that, you'll be very painfully shocked. Do not mess with me Naruto, I've been known to be very unpleasant."

Nil growls and closing his eyes exhales to calm himself. "I will also give you a better summon then that toad one."

"really?"

"yes this one will enable you to summon friends of mine. They are not Reapers like me, but they all have their own skills."

when Naruto nods, Nil smiles. "now then one final piece of info. The last time I did something like this, helping the boy I told you about earlier, a friend of mine had a tendency to begin appearing around him. My friend's name is Chaos, you'll easily be able to spot him if he does the same to you. Do not mind him though, he's insane but he's not bad. Okay?"

Naruto nods his head. When Nil places a paper in front of Naruto the boy looks at him, an eyebrow raised.

"this will be to finalize it Naruto. When you sign you'll be sent back." Naruto nods and signs the paper.

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I don't mean anything by saying women can't be evil like men. Just history recounts a lot more tales of the male species being more prone to do so. Anyway hope you like this and all. Please review and possibly any girls close to Naruto's age to join if the harem goes through. Hinata and Haku are already there per say, Anko would be the only one much older then Naruto I'd let join. I like herJ.