I've gone more with the books in this story – you'll see the significance in the relationship (or lack thereof) between Chuck and Blair. Anyway, Nate and Blair are a pairing I haven't written for yet, so I'm interested to see if I can. I am though, ultimately, an NS shipper :) Anyway, feedback would be greatly appreciated.
Bend, not break
I.
Blair always knew she'd end up back in his arms.
There was too much between them. They were too entangled each other. Too much for anyone else.
"Breathe."
Crouched on the floor, of the elevator Blair stared at the cheap maroon carpet. Her breath was coming in and out in short halting breaths. She shook her head.
"Blair. Breathe." The speaker instructed sternly before gripping her upper arms and pulling her up forcefully.
She wrenched herself out of his grip, his worried expression catching her eye as she did so.
"Nate!" Blair choked out, struggling for air. Tears streamed down her face.
"Blair." His tone was gentler than she had heard it in a long time. Not since Serena had left and Blair figured out why Serena really left. Through her tear-glazed vision Blair saw Nate open his arms to her and she fell into them appreciatively.
Nate held her close, grateful that she was accepting his comfort. Grateful that he could do something for someone. Grateful that Blair was in his arms again, even if only briefly. Experimentally he stroked her hair and rather than pulling away, Blair nuzzled closer with a strangled sob.
He smelled like comfort to her, like warm days and laughter. He smelled like her youth. Soft on top of solid strength, he felt like reassurance. Blair felt safe in Nate's arms, like nothing could touch her here. Another sob sprang half-formed from her lips, and another. Blair buried her face in Nate's chest and didn't even care that the buttons of his shirt were digging into her cheek.
"Hey, hey," Nate cooed soothingly though he had no idea what to say.
"I'm sorry," Blair sniffled. "Your shirt..."
"It's okay. You can cry. I'm here for you."
Nate's permission struck Blair. She did not need to cry and she certainly did not need Nate's permission to do so. Blair took a long deep breath and exhaled through her nose. Blair Waldorf was not a clingy mess. Blair Waldorf fixed things, or at least held it together. She tried to pull away.
Nate gently pressed her head back against his chest and breathed her in. He knew once this moment passed he would lose Blair yet again. He needed her right now, as much as she needed him, and he just wanted this to last a little-
"Nate. It's alright. I'm okay," Blair assured him, struggling to free herself. "I was in shock. I'm fine now. See? Breathing."
Nate's hands dropped to his sides. He stared into Blair's eyes. "How can you possibly be fine? Serena is dead."
Blair's breath caught in her throat. Her eyes filled with tears.
"Blair, I-"
"What the fuck are you even doing here Nate?" Blair lashed out.
"She was my friend too Blair...and Chuck was in the car too, remember?" Nate said flatly, watching a dark spot on the elevator wall.
"Oh God," Blair paled suddenly and put her hand to her mouth. "I totally forgot, is he okay?"
Nate bit his lip, shifted his gaze to the carpet. His concern at finding Blair hyperventilating had briefly overridden his fear for Chuck. Now it had all come rushing back and overwhelmed him.
"Nate? No..." Seeing his stricken expression Blair embraced him.
Nate automatically returned her embrace. "No, no, he's not... it's just... he won't wake up!" Nate's voice cracked.
Blair pulled Nate's face towards hers and his teary eyes met her own.
"Listen to me Nate," Blair said sternly. "He's strong, he's so fucking strong. He's Chuck Bass! He'll be fine…he's got to be."
Nate pulled Blair close again. She sounded so certain. "I hope so."
Blair rubbed Nate's back comfortingly. "He will be baby, he will be. Everything's gonna be okay."
Nate clung to her. To the girl he'd loved, had never stopped loving. She was his calm in storms, his anchor. He had screwed up with Blair. Maybe none of this wouldn't have happened if he and Serena hadn't…
"I'm so, so, so sorry Blair. I was wrong," Nate mumbled into her neck.
"It's okay," Blair soothed, rubbing circles on his back. "We're going to get through this. It will all work out."
"You promise?" Nate asked, childlike and hopeful.
"Oh Nate..." Blair didn't have any answers, couldn't make a promise she couldn't keep. She changed the subject, "Can we see him?"
Nate pulled away from Blair, though she kept her arm firmly around his waist.
"Yeah, yeah, but are you sure you should..?" Nate wondered.
Blair sniffled. "You said it yourself, Serena's dead. Nothing's going to bring her back. But Chuck's not. He needs his friends."
"He's unconscious."
"So? You need your friends. I need to be your friend," Blair admitted. "I can't just stand here and... mourn, or whatever."
"Okay," Nate pushed the number for Chuck's floor and the elevator doors slid shut.
Bart and his latest girlfriend, Naomi, had their attention focused on Chuck when Nate walked into the room with Blair.
"Any news?" Nate asked nervously.
"Nothing yet." Bart replied solemnly.
Blair gasped at the sight of Chuck pale and still, covered in bandages and bruises. He looked so small swathed in white, so frail.
At this, Bart turned to Nate, "We have to be off Nathanial. You're a good friend to Charles." Bart extended his hand out to Nate and they shook hands.
On the adult's departure, Nate turned to Blair, "You don't have to…"
"No I want to." Blair said firmly staying by Nate's side.
Nate let out a sigh, "Thanks Blair. I just don't want to leave him alone right now and having someone else with me, especially you, well…" Nate trailed off, his eyes glistening sadly.
"I know." Blair said reassuringly, now taking Nate's hand in her own.
Chuck's hospital room wasn't set up comfortably for more than one person for a long amount of time so Blair kept busy making herself a comfortable position beside the bed.
Nate settled himself in the padded chair next to Chuck's bed. He looked at her and caught her wrist. Their eyes met and they communicated wordlessly. Nate appreciated the needlessness of speech with his ex-girlfriend. She knew him so well. He pulled Blair next to him.
Blair leaned against Nate and yawned delicately. It was almost three o'clock in the morning and she was emotionally and physically exhausted. Her eyelids fluttered shut against her volition.
Nate wrapped his arm around her and snuggled her closer to his chest. She sighed contentedly and he dropped his head against hers.
Blair wasn't sure how long she'd been asleep when she woke suddenly. Her yielding, rhythmically beating pillow had gone rigid and the pattern had changed. The gentle pressure against her head was gone. Blair lifted her head and opened her eyes. Someone had turned off the lights.
"Nate?" She whispered, wrapping an arm around his torso. "Nate?"
"Blair," he reciprocated her hug.
"You okay?"
"I had... a nightmare, I guess. I'm worried about Chuck."
"I know," Blair paused. "Can I get you anything?"
"No, no, I'm alright. I just... God. What was he even doing in her car?" Nate wondered.
"I don't know. He's always had a soft spot for her," Blair pointed out.
"For all the good it's ever done him."
"Serena's not a bad kid. She's just got a lot of... I can't believe she's dead. I can't wrap my head around it. Lily's is absolutely distraught."
"You've seen her?"
"Yeah. She called me. I don't know what she thought I was going to be able to do, how I was going to be able to bring Serena back..."
"Blair, there's nothing you could have done. It was an accident," Nate rubbed her arm reassuringly.
"I could have been with her, kept her from driving, kept Chuck from getting into her car. She was my best friend. I should have kept her safe," Blair insisted.
"Serena should have kept herself safe. That was her job," Nate corrected. "And as for Chuck, if he hadn't wanted to be with her he wouldn't have been in the car."
"I'm sorry Nate."
"What? What for? You have nothing to be sorry about Blair."
"I should have forgiven you sooner. Then everything would have been okay and Serena wouldn't have left. Then I wouldn't have ignored her when she came back and she wouldn't have started drinking and-"
"Blair, stop. That's just dumb. None of this is your fault. If anything it's mine." Blair shivered against him. "You cold?"
"Upset. Why is this happening?" Blair wondered.
"I don't know," Nate answered honestly. "I keep wondering what we did to upset God this much."
"Maybe God hates us," Blair suggested bitterly.
"Or at least Serena," Nate mumbled sadly as he shifted, trying to get comfortable.
"Lay down," Blair suggested. They moved off the chair and Blair neatly lay down some spare blankets. Nate looked at her questioningly. Blair scooted away from him and then pulled him down until his head was in her lap. She pulled one of the extra blankets over him and ran her fingers through his hair. "Go to sleep."
"Blair..."
"Shhh. It's okay…everything's going to be okay." Blair toyed with his hair until she felt Nate drift off to sleep. She let out a deep sigh as she finally let herself feel again, she let herself feel all the emotions that had come crashing down on her in the elevator. This time though, they were overpowered by a wave of exhaustion that took over her entire body. She closed her eyes and leant back against the cold metal bed frame, falling asleep almost immediately.