Vindicated
Radio Free Roscoe Songfiction
Summary: (set right after season finale) Travis kissed Lily... Ray didn't take it too well obviously, while Travis feels immense guilt for ruining some friendships, but near the end will he finally feel vindicated? Or will he eventually leave RFR and the gang for good...
Rating: PG
Paring: T/L
POV?: Yes, Travis' POV
A/N: This is kinda based around this relationship between my best friend an her crush on HimG (LoLz insider)
I stood there and spoke those words I lived to regret "Are you sure?" I spoke with pure curiosity, I loved Lily, but Ray did too.
"I don't know" she spoke with her soft voice, that haunted my dreams every night, I never got too much sleep after I had met her... she changed my life. I felt her lips press against mine, pure dream I thought, but if it were a dream Ray would never had walked in...
Hope, dangles on a string
Like slow spinning redemption
Winding in and winding out
The shine of it has caught my eye
Roped me in so mesmorizing
And so hypnotizing
I am captivated
I am...
"What the?" Ray mumbled right before he walked out. I felt guilt suddnely push itself upon me, it was so forceful it ended the kiss.
"Ray..." Lily spoke before she left to go after him. There I was all alone again... I sat myself on the red couch, where Lily and I had been standing in front of when the fateful kiss happened.
"Not go too well?" one of my friends voices talked to me.
"Not really..." I muttered, a tad bit sad, but mostly I felt the guilt which I thought would never leave.
"I know Ray is my friend, but you can't blame yourself if Ray never took the step towards Lily's heart." He spoke, Robbie always cheered me up even if it meant almost betraying his best friend..
"Really? Then why is it that I do blame myself..." I said with no emotion, I could tell by the look on Robbie's face he knew how I felt, at that exact moment I left the underground... maybe for the last time...
Vindicated
I am selfish, I am wrong
I am right, I swear I'm right
Swear I knew it all along
And I am flawed
But I am cleaning up so well
I am seeing in me now
The things you swore you saw yourself
I entered my house, sat down in the living room, my parents weren't home again, it wasn't anything new. Laughter though... I heard laughter... I turned towards the window to have my heart ripped out of my own body, there was Lily and Ray, talking an laughing... He had told her, I could see her glowing. I listened closely and only heard parts of their conversation.
Ray...can't..., was what I heard Lily say.
But...you...Travis? was what I heard of Ray's talk.
Yes... was what Lily had spoke, the laughter had stopped, they had hit a touchy subject, soon, I saw Ray walk from Lily, and Lily call his name. I felt more guilt hit me like a hammer to the side. I had broken up one of the most unbreakable friendships... Lily and Ray.. Lily walked away, and I was certain that she had tears flowing from her eyes.
So clear
Like the diamond in your ring
Cut to mirror your intention
Oversized and overwhelmed
The shine of which has caught my eye
And rendered me so isolated
So motivated, I am certain now
That I am..
I had decided I wouldn't go down to the warehouse to look for Lily that night... I had sworn I would never step foot in that place ever again, but here I am in front of the warehouse door, with mumbled sobs coming from the inside.
I debated myself in my head for a good 20 minutes about going inside, I knew what the insides of the warehouse held. Lily. The Lily I had loved since the day I had seen her with her two friends at a completely different lunch table than I was seated.
I walked inside... A broken down Lily threw herself at me, and I gladly hugged her back, I even felt a little guilt fall off of my shoulders, I hugged her untill her tears were almost non-existant.
Vindicated
I am selfish, I am wrong
I am right, I swear I'm right
Swear I knew it all along
And I am flawed
But I am cleaning up so well
I am seeing in me now
The things you swore you saw yourself
"Travis..." she muttered from the other side of the red couch were we were silently sitting.
"Yes?" I looked into her deep green eyes, if only she would look back into mine, but her stare was at the ground in front of her.
"I talked to Ray today..." she said moving her eyes up a little.
"Oh?" I asked in a tone of sympathy and sadness, I wish I didn't know how that talk had went but I did..
"I told him who I chose..." Lily said in a louder voice, more like her normal one...
I just sat there, looking blankily into her eyes, then one of the most magical moments happened... she looked into mine, and cracked a small smile. she started speaking in a near-crying tone.
"I chose you..."
So turn up the corners of your lips
Part them and feel my finger tips
Trace the moment, fall forever
Defence is paper thin
Just one touch and I'd be in too deep
to ever swim against the current
I felt this part of me just overjoy.. but then the other part reminded me of Ray.
"Lily I have a confession..." I spoke suddenly.
"Oh..."she said in an undescribable tone of her wonderful voice.
"I heard you and Ray earlier, I was inside my living room..." I said coming clean about my eavesdropping earlier.
Lily just sat there and said, "So you know what happened between Ray and I..."
"Yes, and I know it's because of me..." when I said that, she suddenly started to cry again, I caused more pain to her and myself... Guilt, it was making me sick to my stomach, I had ruined Ray and Lily's friendship along with the possible end of RFR. She tried to talk through her tears.
"I Loovvvve y-y-you t-t-though" she said, her eyes finally completely looked into mine, and I felt a twing of guilt gone again.
So let me slip away, so let me slip away
So let me slip away, so let me slip against the current
So let me slip away, so let me slip away
So let me slip away, so let me slip away
"Lily..." I tried to regain some courage to admit my feelings back to her.
She just looked at me with watered eyes, which made me a bit more courageous, and yet again more guilt was relieved.
"I love you more than anybody else in the world..." I said in the softest tone I could. I reached my hand out and wiped a tear away from her eyes.
Lily cracked a smile, and I felt her moving in closer...
"What about Ray... " I said whiel still moving in to kiss her.
"You can't control when love will pull a sneak attack on you..." Lily muttered, and made me smile, and for some reason I no longer felt guilt whatsoever. It could of been because of what Lily said...or the fact that Ray and I never had a good friendship... but I thought it was the fact I could feel Lily's lips press against mine, this time Ray did not walk in...
Vindicated
I am selfish, I am wrong
I am right, I swear I'm right
Swear I knew it all along
And I am flawed
But I am cleaning up so well
I am seeing in me now
The things you swore you saw yourself
We broke apart, and stared into each other's eyes... it was the perfect moment, I finally let Lily know how I felt.
"Travis, I'm really happy now..." she said giving me a smile.
"But your friendship with Ray is-"
"Not over... Travis, he has to learn that I only see him as a brother now... You I see as more..." she said, which sent my heart rate up a few thousand beats per second.
"Lily... I know that he might hate me, but I want to go out with you..." I nearly begged.
"He will have to live with it, because I want to go out with you too...
Slight hope, dangles on a string
We were leaving the underground hand in hand when I realized I was free... free from all guilt because Lily was on the same page as I. It slowed me down, and Lily was almost concerned.
"Is something wrong?" Lily asked me.
"No, everything is perfect, Lily, you've made me feel vindicated, and I'm really glad to have that feeling again..." I said to her as I pulled her into another kiss, before we left for home... it was going on 11 and Lily needed to be home by 11:30...
Like slow spinning redemption
A/M: You like? I actually liked writing it... it felt... real since I was basing it off a friend and her crush. Plus I actually like it, which I normally don't like many things I write, so please review!
Much Love,
Amanda