Another 2 A.M.
A JTHM fanfiction by Dustie
DISCLAIMERS - I do NOT own JTHM. Enough said?
It was a moment in history worth the spoiling of blank paper. Ink splashed on white, messily depicting the words 'I am happy'. To be truly happy was one of the most foreign of feelings to touch Nny's fragile state of emotion. And to have this word to suddenly thrust into his vocabulary was like receiving a soft flutter of butterfly wings in his stomach. Or was it a blow? Sometimes, it was hard to tell the difference.
"I really enjoyed tonight, Nny..." came Devi's voice from across the couch. How long HAD it been since he had a friendly visit? Someone who could sit across from him on the couch and smile like that? Someone that he didn't end up throwing a knife into? "Really. We should have done this sooner! Why didn't we do this sooner?" He let her ramble, watching her lips as they curved around each word. "I mean, we've known each other for, what, about three months now? And this has been the first time we've ever actually been out together! What would you have done if I had never asked you out?"
The question mark at the end of her sentence seemed to knock him in the head and he looked at her uncertainly. Awkwardly? Timidly? His expressions seemed to mean a number of things. "I would have been happy just to go to the bookstore and see you there. I always like doing that," he replied.
"But you have to admit: tonight was fun. The conversation, the movie, and that view! Looking down on all the people that deserve to be looked down on. Fun!" She grinned widely as she spoke. Like she wanted to laugh but kept it secret.
He got to his feet, turning his back on her. "Yeah, it was very nice; completely. I love Brazil. Gilliam is God." He paused for a moment, letting their silence sink in. "Um... Devi?"
"Yyess?"
"Why did you ask me out? Why did you want to go out with me?"
Her smile seemed to fall away all at once and as if batting away an annoyance, one of her eyebrows twitched. Realizing his mistake, he turned again to face her. "I'm not fishing for compliments or anything like that," he said. "I just mean, well... I want to know why you thought of me."
Without transition, she smiled again. (Thanks be to whatever God is listening!) "It's simple," she began. "I like you. I enjoy our talks, when you come visit me at the bookstore. I like you for all those reasons people ask a person out for. There, I've said MY thing. Now I just hope your thoughts run along the same lines. If not, then I'll just get awkward and leave quietly after killing you."
The silence that ensued was of mixed proportions. Was she serious? After all, it wouldn't have been the least bit surprising. Devi seemed to think right alongside Nny. Why not let them both be psychopathic murderers? 'Better not let things get awkward then,' he thought and all at once, they shared a good, long laugh. After the climax of their mirth had dwindled, he ended it with a bemused sigh. "This is strange," he began. "What do I say? You are beautiful, I mean... God, I'm so completely happy right now." The word 'Happy' felt more like a lump in his throat. Happy... God, but it felt good. Say it again! "You've made me HAPPY."
"Good," her voice somehow sounded...closer. "Then let's both be happy." When he turned his eyes again in her direction, he found her leaning forward, both hands resolute upon the tattered cushions. It was as if that meaningful gaze had pulled him forward with invisible strings and lured him in. Feminine charm - a magnet for the lips.
I'm Happy.
With their faces so close, a kiss would have been appropriate. Yes, of course. A kiss!
God... I'm so happy... HAPPY! NNY IS HAPPY!
"Yes! Yes!" their lips had merely brushed against each other before he jerked away. "Happiness! I'm HAPPY!" Devi's voice chased him into the next room. Even the slamming of the door didn't muffle them. "Nny! Where are you going?!"
Where am I going? Where AM I going? He stopped at the mirror, eyeing his collection of knives laid out neatly on his dresser. The doughboys sat there, faces so still it was unnerving, like demented angel/devil shoulder buddies. "Happiness?" Mr. Eff intoned, his voice eerily echoing in and out of Nny's head. "Ahhh, beautiful happiness. So rare. So lovely like the beautiful stars and the dreaming moon..." Was he mocking? "A rapturous alien sky after the oppressive shit-smear of clouds has broken; true pleasure. Smile and FEEL it!"
"Mr. Fuck lies, Johnny!" Now the other had chipped in, his voice harsh against his ears. "No love, no happiness, no moon! Nothing for you!" No, it doesn't have to be like that... Why can't I be happy? "I speak the only truth! Untainted knowledge!" No... you're wrong, doughboy. "Listen to m-"
"Shut the fuck up, Psycho-Doughboy! I'm in NO mood for a depression!" Nny screeched.
At this, Mr. Eff's face seemed to light up. He had the upper hand. He'd win! "Yeeessss!" He hissed. "Go Nny! Don't let the beautiful moon set! Capture it! Freeze it! Forever in time with never the memory of losing it to another day!"
'Yes,' Nny thought... 'I could... I could do that.'
"Nny?" Devi had opened the door, slowly peeking her head in. "There you are!" Nny fingered the two knives laying before him, their familiar handles itching to be taken up and put to use. 'Immortalize the moment... stay happy.'
"What are you doing?" He could hear her take one step over the threshold. That one sound seemed as loud as a gunshot against the hollow wooden flooring and he cringed unintentionally. In the back of his head, he could hear Mr. Eff's monotonous whispering. "Capture it! Don't let it go! IMMORTALIZE THE MOMENT!"
Another footfall followed the last. "Nny...?" He clutched the handles for a moment, squeezing his fingers around their inviting hilts. And in that one moment, he wanted more than anything to spill her blood yet at the same time, he dropped his hands. "Nothing," he replied at last and when he turned again, he had a smile on his face. Though whether friendly or not was - again - hard to tell. "Forgive me... I ..." his eyes darted about the room. Knives here, swords there, blood spats... The Doughboys...
Without another word of explanation ('how can I explain it?'), he ushered her out, closing the door firmly behind him. "I'm not feeling well," he said much too quickly as he shoved her coat into her arms. "I had fun tonight," - pushing her towards the door - "we should do it again!" Finally, she stood outside on his doorstep, her expression one of utter confusion.
"Um..." she raised an eyebrow. "Did I... do something wrong?"
He dismissed the question with an wave of his hand. "Of course not. Good Night." As he went to close the door, she lunged back towards him, planting her lips on his cheek. "Good night," she smiled a little uncertainly before she turned on her heel and made her way back down the sidewalk, slipping her coat over her shoulders all the while.
Nny - quick to snap the door shut - rubbed his cheek after it was secure inside it's frame and he hidden behind it. "Things could be different," he mused to his unseen doughboys. Through the closed door at his back he thought he could hear them snickering at his naivete.
No love. No happiness. No moon. NOTHING FOR YOU!
Note from the Author:
So this is the first chapter of my first JTHM fanfiction. In all honesty, I started this fic as a time waster even though I find that I'm having more fun with it as I gather more ideas. Right here, I should probably apologize in advance if I am slow with updates. Because I probably will be... and I also apologize if I somehow manage to go OOC at points. After all, Nny is a very complicated character.
I decided to start this fic with the date scene from the comic. That way, I thought it might make things seem a little more real to the readers. And as you read this, don't expect some mushy-gushy love story. The irony that kicked in near the end of that particular part in the comic ... will most likely kick in later in this fic (And that's the end of that! Can't spoil anything, now can I?). So don't get discouraged! I have some ... interesting plans. [insert sinister laughter here.]
Chapter Two coming soon...
Hopefully.
Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed it ... somewhat.