A/N: Lol, I was initially planning to make this a part of Ways On How To Annoy Sanada To Hell, but the chapter became so long that I decided to make it into a stand alone one shot instead of a chapter, haha. It was kind of randomly inspired by a question that popped into my head one day. "Do Christmas trees have seeds?" xD! Well anyways, I hope you enjoy it!
Disclaimer : PoT and all its fabulous characters belong solely to Takeshi Konomi sensei~ xD
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Although it was a tad too late to realise it, Sanada knew he should have not let down his guard the minute he came to school and found that the tennis courts were filled with pot holes and uneven lumps with dirt and soil strewn all over the place. He also knew he shouldn't have given the key to the gate to Niou and Kirihara. Damn. What were they doing, planting booby traps in the middle of the courts? Throwing all the tennis balls into dirt pits so that they couldn't be used? Or worse... Were they planning to bury everyone alive in the tennis courts? Sanada's mind ran wild with the thoughts of countless possibilities of the various atrocities that Niou and Kirihara could come up with.
Spotting a flash of unruly black hair, Sanada took quick steps towards the figure and grabbed him by the scruff of his neck. "TARUNDORU! AKAYA, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Pulling said boy out of the pit, his eyebrows went up a notch when he noticed that Akaya was clutching a bag of seeds in one hand, and sparkly decorative items in another. His jersey was in a mess and his hair was specked with soil. Wait a minute. How on earth did soil get into the tennis courts?!
As if reading Sanada's mind all too clearly, Akaya smiled cheekily and responded, "I'm growing CHRISTMAS TREES!" and continued grinning like a chesire cat as if growing christmas trees in school, not to mention on concrete ground, was the most normal thing in the world to do. Although, normal couldn't really be applied in this situation... Or to be frank, any situation in Rikkaidai, for a fact. Sanada's eyebrow twitched rapidly, he swore he felt a vein burst in his head. "Akaya, christmas trees are not grown by putting seeds and decorations into potholes, especially not potholes in tennis courts... To begin with... WHY THE HELL ARE YOU PLANTING CHRISTMAS TREES IN THE MIDDLE OF MARCH?"
Akaya gave him a very confused look, which would have been cute, if not for the situation he was in. "But if you plant them now, they'd grow into nicely decorated christmas trees by December, and then Santa – Claus – San will come and leave us presents under the trees because we were good children! Besides, I did add a little soil to the seeds..." He gave that same goofy grin which only served to make Sanada more irritated than he already was. "And what makes you think that these unfertilised seeds which are covered in decorations and buried in concrete will grow into christmas trees?" "Oh, because Niou – Senpai told me so."
Realisation and understanding dawned upon Sanada. Trust Niou to teach the brat such nonsensical logic. Sanada sighed and rubbed his temples. "Akaya, what Niou said is utter rubbish." Wide eyed, Akaya stared at Sanada as if he had just turned into an ugly deformed alien from Pluto. "So you mean, I'm NOT supposed to decorate the seeds with sparkly items, but with fertilisers instead? Ooh! That makes sense, kinda!" Sanada felt like slapping himself. Damn Niou and his brainwashing. "No, Akaya. What I mean is YOU. CAN'T. PLANT. CHRISTMAS. TREES. ANYWHERE. AND. SANTA. CLAUS. DOESN'T. EVEN. EXIST."
At this statement, Akaya let out a terrified gasp. "Y – you, Sanada – fukubuchou you meanie! You just denied Santa – San's existence! Santa – San will banish you to the ends of Elf Land!" With that, Akaya ran out of the courts crying, and in the process, tripped over a pile of dirst and fell into a pit he dug and lost consciousness. Sanada ruthlessly left him there to rot while he picked up a shovel and started to clean up the courts before the other regulars arrived.
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When training had ended, Sanada was not surprised when Niou had not showed up for practice, boy was he going to be in for it when he came back. As Sanada changed out of his tennis clothes, and removed his tennis shoes, he overheard Yagyuu and Yanagi talking to each other. "Hey, I wonder what Kirihara – Kun and Niou – Kun are up to now? They were both absent from practice." "Hmmm, 67 percent that Niou didn't come because he didn't want to receive punishment and 85 percent Akaya is absent due to a mishap. His mother did say he left the house early today, and I do recall seeing his tennis bag in the locker. Perhaps it has something to do with the prank Sanada was talking about this morning?"
Sanada paled when he overheard the pair's conversation. He had forgotten all about Akaya in the midst of clearing the potholes and dirt, he had covered up the hole that Akaya had fallen into. HOLY, Yukimura was going to kill him if it was the last thing he did! Scrambling to his feet, Sanada bolted out of the door with the shovel and proceeded to re – dig all the holes in search of their precious kohai who could have possibly already died of lack of oxygen or hypothermia. Night had already fallen, and cicadas and owls were calling, when Sanada had finally hit something. Peering into the hole, he saw Akaya, whom he had been frantically searching for, curled up inside the hole, sound asleep, murmuring something about pandas and clowns. Sighing in relief, Sanada picked him up and carried him back home.
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RANDOM ALTERNATE OMAKE-ISH ENDING!
When Sanada was on his way home, a hand suddenly shot up from the ground and grabbed his ankle. Alarmed, wild thoughts ran through Sanada's head. Was it a ghost? A vampire? Dracula? A mummy? Turning back in horror, he shrieked and fainted when he saw Kirihara Akaya's ghastly head popping out from the ground...
... End ...
