Sleepwalker, a glee fanfic

Author's Note: I stopped and really listened this song and this storyline wouldn't let me go. I knew I had to write it, because it just felt like a Puckelberry story! I have never written anything so fast! Hopefully you all enjoy it! This is my first attempt at a one-shot, because really I find it hard to keep things short. This takes place after episode 8: Mash-Up, but I took liberties and changed the way things worked out on the bleachers, just because I think Puck and Rachel shouldn't have broken up then- 1 episode was just not enough of those two! Obviously, this story is not how I want things to work out but, for the song's sake, it had to be done. Any reviews would be greatly appreciated- the good, the bad, and any and all suggestions! This is rated M for a relatively descriptive scene later on… you've been warned!

P.S. Glee is owned by Ryan Murphy and Fox. I am just borrowing the characters to satisfy my twisted needs! "Sleepwalker" is owned by Adam Lambert and 19 entertainment. I am thankful for Mark Salling, and the rest of the Glee cast every day! Can't wait for Santa to bring me my Glee, Vol. 1: Road to Sectionals DVD!

If there was one thing Puck knew about, it was broken hearts. He had done enough heart-breaking in his life to recognize the signs. However, this was the first time he had been on the receiving end.

"I saw a picture of you hanging in an empty hallway…"

Walking down the hall, he stopped at the picture for what might just be the 100th time. Staring at their first win at Nationals, his eyes focused on the girl in the middle, holding the trophy.

And it was all because of her. Her and her stupid skirts. Her and her stupid voice. Her and her stupid belief in him. Her.

As much as he wanted to think it was her, he was the stupid one. He had to go and fall for her. That had not been in his plan. But somewhere in between all her crazy and his initial denial about all of it, it happened. If he had known that at the start, he probably would've avoided the whole situation. 'Well, hindsight is always 20/20,' he thought…

"I heard a voice that I knew and I couldn't walk away…"

And then he heard it. That voice, carrying through the air, finding a way to his ears, even though the auditorium was down the hall and around two corners. Though he tried, he couldn't get his feet to move him further away from it. So he stood there, and thought about things, which was much too often of an occurrence for him lately…

"It took me back to the end of everything. I taste it all, I taste it all, the tears again…"

Fighting the tears that threatened to spill over, he thought of how it all started. With her voice. The first time he heard her, he found himself amazed. How could someone so annoying sound like that when she sang? That was the moment he realized he could listen to her all day. Sing, that is, not talk. God, that would make him want to set himself on fire- and not in a good way! That's all he'd admit to himself. That's what the plan had been at least…

"Outside the rain's fallin' down. There's not a drop that hits me. Scream at the sky but no sound is leavin' my lips…"

Finding his footing again, he took off towards the football field, the one place he could let it all out. Thankfully, no one was there. He was able to use the entire field as his playground. He ran laps first. Then he switched to practicing plays. With every practiced move, her voice kept echoing in his ears…

"It's like I can't even feel after the way you touched me. I'm not asleep, but I'm not awake
after the way you loved me…"

Her voice led to him recalling the lingering sensations of her touch the last and only time they had been together.

They had been at her house, watching West Side Story for like the thousandth time. Her head was resting in his lap, like usual, and once again, he couldn't concentrate on the movie. With her fingers laced with his, he was lost in her. He never would've thought he'd be lucky enough to have a girl like her. He didn't deserve her. But, none the less, she was his. He remembered her looking up at him with that sparkle in her eye and he swore he felt his heart explode. When had he become such a girl? He knew he'd never felt anything like it before and next thing he knew, his lips were moving. Though everything in him was telling him to stop, he couldn't. He didn't. "Rachel, I love you…"

"I can't turn this around. I keep running into walls that I can't break down. I said I just wander around with my eyes wide shut because of you. I'm a sleepwalker, walker, walker…
I'm a sleepwalker, walker, walker…"

He'd been over that moment a countless number of times in his head. There'd been no indication that he had taken a misstep in saying those words. She'd cried. "Happy tears,' she said and they'd spent the rest of the night in her bed, tangled up in the sheets. She'd been more than willing to lead him up those stairs and he could barely contain himself when she shut her door and took off her sweater, revealing her lacy, pink bra he was pretty sure was the most amazing thing he'd ever seen. As his lips trailed kisses down her body, he made sure to stop at all her most intimate places. Her moans of pleasure told him more than any of her long tirades ever could. His fingers got lost in her wetness and he could feel himself getting harder. But, when she said his name, he couldn't wait any longer. Somehow she sensed this and pulled out a foil square. Much to his surprise, she slipped in over him quickly, with the ease of someone who'd done it many times before. She smiled at him and pulled him closer to her. Unable to wait, he thrust into her, but paused when she winced beneath him. He almost pulled out, but at her encouragement, he continued slowly until her body began to arch and her moans returned. At that moment, he was overwhelmed with a sense of fulfillment he had never experienced before, and he realized the truth of his earlier words. When she breathed his name again, that was it. One final thrust and they both tumbled over the edge, collapsing into each other's arms, where they fell into a peaceful sleep…

"Let me out of this dream…"

No moment since, had been that perfect. Only because they weren't her. He'd tried to get that night out of his head, by returning every innuendo and accepting every invitation thrown his way. They only strengthened the memory in his mind. He knew it would never be the same for him…

"Everywhere that I go I see another memory…"

He found he had wandered back into the school and was at his locker. The top shelf was still so clean and organized, something she had insisted upon if she was to leave her math book there, so they could "spend more time together" between the two classes that they didn't share. He hadn't been able to bring himself to mess it up. He kept hoping she would come back and be using it again…

"And all the places we used to know, they're always there to haunt me. I walk around and I feel so lost and lonely…"

When he got home, he threw himself down on his bed. His eyes gravitated towards his guitar and instantly she was with him again. That day marked the first time he really knew she had gotten to him. She had been sitting on his bed, eyeing his guitar while he played. She stopped singing along with him and watched his fingers plucking the strings. He loved when she did that, because he felt special, noticed. She had been the only one, besides his mom, that didn't make him feel like a total screw-up. There were a million reasons that she should hate him. But for some reason, she didn't. She had said she saw something in him; believed in him. So when she asked if she could try, of course he didn't even hesitate handing over his guitar. As she strummed the strings, he started laughing out loud until he saw the frustration in her eyes when the notes followed no rhyme, reason, or melody.

Without saying a word, he moved behind her and placed his hands over hers, guiding her fingers over the strings. She smiled as the notes floated beautifully into the air, and he couldn't help but smile with her. "You're a great teacher, Noah," she had said. It was such a simple statement, yet for him, it meant more than he cared to share with her. He hoped the smile he gave her after her words, followed by a kiss, said it all. Judging from her reaction, it had. He spent the rest of the night showing her how special she was to him, as they made out on his bed. He knew where she stood, and, not wanting to mess things up with her stopped him from pushing her into things, even though he was having a very hard time controlling himself. Yeah, he really had fallen for her if he was changing that much…

"You're everything that I want, but you don't want me…"

Even after all that changing, she had still gone and done the unthinkable. The thought still made him angry and he grabbed his pillow and punched his fist into it a few times.

At dinner that night, he had pulled out all the stops for her. He wanted to give her the night she had always dreamed of. He really was starting to turn into a girl, but for some reason his 17 year old brain couldn't quite figure out, he didn't care. He just wanted to see her smile. Dinner had gone well and he was on cloud nine. Though he had already said those three magic words, he wanted to tell her all he felt. He wanted to give her all of him. It was a scary thought, but he wanted her to know. Needed her to know.

He'd had his whole speech planned out- ready for when dessert came. What he wasn't ready for, was her to speak first. He was even less ready for the words he heard spew from her lips. "Noah, I can't do this anymore… I can't keep lying to myself… to you." He watched as the tears started falling from her eyes, and he gripped the table tightly, feeling his knuckles turn white and his breathing slow. "I… uh… you know when I said I was going to visit my grandparents a few weeks ago?" She paused and he held his breath. "Well… um... yeah… I didn't really go there. I was with Finn."

At the mention of the other boy's name, his anger reached its boiling point. He stood up, throwing his napkin on the table and walked away. She had begged him to stay, but he ignored her pleas and left her standing there in the parking lot alone…

He fought the tears that were coming yet again. He wasn't going to do this. Not over her. Not one more time.

For days afterwards, he had ignored her call, texts, and instant messages. He had avoided her in the halls, turning in the opposite direction of her, even if it meant being late for his classes. He even managed to keep himself busy at Glee rehearsals, talking to anybody else, so not to have to exchange words with her. He caught her eyes a few times and he could see the sadness in them. That made him secretly happy, knowing she must be suffering too. Then he would see her talking to Finn and it took every ounce of self-control he had not to storm out of the choir room. He wasn't going to show her, and the rest of the club, what she had broken him into- a million pieces, though part of him knew they already had it figured out…

"Let me out of this dream, dream… Let me out of this dream…"

Even now, six months later, it still hurt. The one time he had let someone in, the one thing he told himself that he would never do after his dad left, he regretted it. He had spent years building that wall. And all it took to destroy it were short skirts, a beautiful voice, and some cheap words he now knew were lies. She never believed in him. That's what he told himself now. He was certain. How else could she have done that to him, after he told her how he felt?

If only he could not care so much whenever they locked eyes…

If only he hadn't made that first move… Damn Mr. Schuester and his mash-ups!

If only he had let her break up with him that day on the bleachers, instead of convincing her to stay…

Looking back, he realized that his biggest mistake may have been deciding to go ahead with the plan to make Quinn and Finn jealous. He should've known that it would work out where he got the shit end of the stick, as always.

Now, because of his stupid idea, he was stuck seeing her everywhere and remembering her touch, numb to it all, sleepwalking through what should be the best years of his life…

"I'm a sleepwalker. Let me out of this dream…"