Disclaimer: I do not own Pretty Little Liars or this song. All credit for characters and lyrics goes to ABC Family and Avant (Wanna Be Close).
Oooo I wanna be girl let me be
I wanna be everything your man's not
And I'm gonna give you every little thing I've got
Cause you are more than a man needs
That's why I say you're truly my destiny
I'm gonna get cha if it takes me until forever
No you don't feel me if forever turns into never
I'll let you know my love is just that strong
And for you never just ain't that long
Caleb had seen her when she was dating Sean, had noticed her holding back, not shining as she normally did. Hanna was a million-watt lightbulb with both the looks and the personality to match. Caleb knew Sean recognized that and used it to his advantage. In doing so, he took away from her light. He dimmed the glow she'd always had, the glow she'd had even when dealing with Alison and the relentless teasing. Sean knew her for what she was, shining brilliance in motion, but he never gave her the props for it. He made her feel lucky to be with him, like he was doing her a favor. Hanna never knew what she had within herself. Caleb planned to change that.
I wanna be the smile you put on your face
I wanna be your hands when you say your grace
I wanna be whatever is your favorite place
Oh I just wanna be close
"You don't have to sit here and listen to this. Just go take your shower." She was tired of putting up walls and being by herself behind them.
"It can wait." He wasn't leaving her. Not until she knew she wasn't alone.
"Why do you care?" She knew their relationship was based on mutual need, hers being technological assistance and his being a place to stay. This sensitive side of him didn't fit with that definition.
"Because you're the only person in Rosewood worth sitting back down for. You need to know that, Hanna. You're beyond this, all of this." He made a sweeping gesture to signify his point. He wanted to reach out to her, but he didn't dare for fear of scaring her off.
I wanna be the hat you put on your head
I wanna be the sheets you put on your bed
I wanna be the skirt wrapped around your legs
Oh, I just wanna be close
He watched her walk through the halls at school looking like she didn't have a care in the world. She hid her pain well and she knew how to wear a smile as well as she wore her designer clothes. He noticed her looking back at him from beneath her eyelashes and he knew she felt the same way about him. He wanted to make her believe all the good things he knew about her. And he wanted her to show him the good things about himself.
And even if the day turns into night
I will love you by candlelight
And even if the water starts to run over
I'll be there to put you on my shoulder
And if it's hard for you to get to sleep
I will sing you a melody
I wanna feel this way till the end of time
Cause I pray one day that you will be mine
Sometimes they met late at night in the kitchen when they were sure her mother was asleep. He had learned early on in his stay at the Marin household that Hanna didn't sleep well. She would toss and turn for hours until finally coming downstairs. He was always waiting there for her. They began a routine of whispering things they someday hoped to do. He liked to think they would've whispered even if her mother hadn't been there, as if whispered wishes could more easily become realities.
"I want to learn how to be okay with just me," she shared with him one night.
"What do you mean? You're completely confident when you want to be. It's when you let people like Sean and your friends decide who you are that you aren't okay."
"No, I mean I want to know that if I woke up tomorrow without my clothes or popularity or even my friends, that just me would be good enough. That I could still make it…like you do."
"Surviving alone doesn't mean you're okay, Hanna. It just means you have no other choice."
"You try surviving being best friends with Allison and tell me which you'd choose. I'm not saying you're not amazingly strong, Caleb. I'm just saying that's what I wish I was."
"So you think I'm amazing, huh?" The smirk on his face told her she hadn't offended him.
Laughing, she nudged his shoulder and said, "Only half as amazing as you think you are."
Without missing a beat, he locked her eyes with his and said, "Only half as amazing as I think you are."
I wanna be the smile you put on your face
I wanna be your hands when you say your grace
I wanna be whatever is your favorite place, oh
I just wanna be close
After that night and her touching his shoulder, she noticed both of them finding small ways to touch each other. A gentle push, a slight tap, a brushing of the fingers when reaching for the orange juice in the morning after her mom had left the house. One time when they were doing their homework and sharing a textbook, she could've sworn he was smelling her hair, but when she looked up he was diligently copying the next problem out of the book.
"What do you wanna be when you grow up?" She asked to break the monotony of trigonometry.
"Anywhere but here," he said hoping to make her laugh. When she didn't, he thought for a moment and said, "I want to do something where I take something beautiful and share it with the world. I don't know if that'll be music, or writing, photography or whatever. But I want it to make people smile or cry or laugh, make them feel something. A moment of emotion, within and beyond themselves."
"Wow," was all Hanna could think to say to the uncharacteristic moment of seriousness and clarity from the resident bad boy of Rosewood. She couldn't stop herself from leaning up to kiss his cheek before returning to the math equations.
See my life's filled with up and downs
I'm ok when you're around
And when I'm in a storm and my nights are cold
Reach out your hands for me to hold
See you're my queen on a throne and you're the reason
For a song and I can't wait to fill you up with love
Fill you with love
As the weeks passed and they were consistently there for each other to pick up the pieces, barriers fell to the wayside and they found themselves laughing and smiling more. They both felt freer than they ever had. Neither of them planned what happened in the tent, but he knew he wouldn't change it for the world. And he knew she wouldn't either. Not for her mother or her friends, people at school, or "A." No one could make her not love him once he'd taken the time to get through all her walls, one by one. No one could make her not want him close to her.
I wanna be the sun, your stars, your moon
I wanna be a hot summer day in June
I wanna be the smell of your sweet perfume
I just wanna be close
I wanna be the seed that bare your life brand new
I wanna be the one that's so faithful and true
I wanna be the man down that aisle in that suit, yes
I just wanna be close