What's Wrong with a Little Chaos?
It has been forty seven days since Clarke had left the camp, had left Bellamy, and today she returned.
When she first left, and everybody was asking Bellamy where she had gone, why he hadn't stopped her and why she left, Bellamy didn't know what to say. He trusted Clarke enough to know that she had to leave, she had to, by herself, live with what she had done. She had left Bellamy, and it had hurt him. Although, he never let it show.
When she first left and many of Jaha's camp saw the direction she headed in tried to stop her, Bellamy had to talk them down. It was one of the most difficult words he had ever had to spit out. Clarke didn't want to be found. He himself wanted to run into the woods and never return until his partner was back with him. Explaining to Abby was the hardest part. He had to look her mother in the eye and explain that her daughter had left her. That she wasn't going to come back.
People had initially protested, claiming that Clarke was the reason they were home now. And safe. But others were glad to see the back of her. They called her a murderer, saying there could have been another way. Bellamy ignored these people because he knew that's what Clarke would tell him to do. The old Bellamy would have thrown them to the ground and demand their apology but he wasn't the same man that came down on the first dropship. Sure, he would do anything within his power to save his sister, but he didn't want to inflict anymore pain.
The day Clarke returned, it was Bellamy who found her. He and a small group of others had went hunting, in hope to catch a deer. Bellamy and ventured deeper into the forest than usual for hunting that day. Just letting his feet carry him where they wanted. Now that both themselves and the Grounders were home, and the Mountain Men were no longer a threat, neither were the woods. Sure, if they came across a Grounder, because of Lexa's betrayal, there was an awkward fight stance and shuffle until one of them kept walking. But that rarely happened. And with Lincoln, his sister's boyfriend and former Grounder by his side, he felt safe enough.
They heard a shuffle in the trees and both men turned, Bellamy with his gun ready and Lincoln with his weapon of choice. They froze, watching the trees carefully. After some time when nothing happened, they both continued forward, their guards up in case the sound came again. The second time they heard a ruffling it followed with a slight "Ouch!" coming from deep in the trees. Bellamy turned and called out, knowing someone was there.
"Who's out there!?" He shouted and gave Lincoln a wary look.
"Bellamy?" A familiar voice shouted. He stopped right in his tracks, his heart beating erratically in his chest.
"Clarke?" He called, lowering his gun. He felt Lincoln watching him but he ignored his stare. Instead, he stepped towards the rustling in the trees and finally saw a blonde haired girl come into sight. Her clothes were dirty, her hair greasy and her face covered in dirt and blood. They stared at each other for a long moment before Bellamy walked forward and flung his arms around the smaller girl. She made a surprised sound, but returned the embrace just as passionately.
"I knew you'd come home one day!" Bellamy said happily, swirling her around with a laugh. She joined in but frowned when he let her go.
"I'm not coming back yet Bellamy." She told him seriously. The smile vanished off his face.
"Why not Clarke? " He asked her. She looked away and saw Lincoln standing with a grin. She ran at him and hugged him enthusiastically. When she looked back to Bellamy, she gave a sad smile.
"Where have you been?" He asked.
"I was at the capitol for a while." She told him. "I was just walking to my next location. I didn't think anyone would be this far into the forest."
"We're hunting." Bellamy explained. "Clarke, why won't you come back?" She looked away, watching the trees sway gently in the wind.
"I bear it so they don't have to." She told him again.
"But I'm bearing it too. We did what we had to do together. Please come back. We need you." He wasn't sure if his speech was winning her over, but he knew he was speaking from the heart. "I need you, Clarke." She looked up then, eyes slightly glassed over.
It took a very long time, but eventually both men talked Clarke to coming back, even just to see her mother, even for a few hours. When they walked into camp, a wary Clarke by his side, the camp began to clap. People ran up to her in warm greeting when they realised who was by Bellamy's side, and those who did not approve of her methods stood back whispering snide comments. Bellamy ignored them. He was getting good at it.
Her mother was overjoyed. She thanked Bellamy with watery eyes and a large smile. Clarke settled quickly. She helped out in the hospital and even asked to share a room with Raven to stay the night because her tent had been used by someone else while she was gone.
Bellamy fell asleep that night, a little smile on his face. Octavia would be home in a few days, he knew she would be happy to see Clarke, I mean, why wouldn't she be? The girls, as far as he knew, got on pretty well. The next morning Clarke was still there. And the morning after that. And the morning after that. She had a sad smile, and she held herself in a way so that no one could see how heavy the weight on her shoulders truly were. But Bellamy knew. And he vowed silently to help her.
A few weeks past, and Clarke made no attempt to leave without returning. She had a few harsh run-ins with those who didn't like her methods, but Bellamy, with the help of others, managed to restore the peace. When Octavia returned, both girls looked nervous but they embraced, relieved the other was alive at least. Bellamy wasn't sure why Octavia was so against talking to Clarke, but his sister was always unpredictable.
On the third week of Clarke's arrival, they both sat around the warm campfire together, eating the rabbit one of the hunters managed to capture. Clarke was chatting but Bellamy was lost in thought, nodding occasionally to show her he was trying to listen. Ever since they had returned from Mount Weather, and all of their people were home again, Bellamy couldn't help but notice there was one face he never saw anywhere. When the first dropship came, the one that Clarke thought her parents were on, and crashed, he wasn't sure if his friend was on it or not. He wouldn't even let himself think it. But then more dropships came. And all the adults and the other confined teenagers returned to earth, he prayed hopelessly that she would be there. That she returned safely to earth. But he hadn't seen her anywhere. She was in his mind, embedded in his thoughts. He missed her terribly. But he wouldn't let it show.
Clarke nudged him with her elbow, drawing him away from his thoughts.
"Are you okay?" she asked with a concerned smile.
"Of course I am." He lied. She gave him an unconvinced look.
"What's wrong Bellamy?" He wasn't sure why he answered her, maybe it was because he knew Clarke would help him? Or maybe because he had to say it out loud?
"All of the dropships have come to earth. There is no one left on the Ark, Jaha was the last. It just makes me wonder… I think… I haven't seen her." He said slowly, watching the fire.
"Seen who?" Clarke asked gently.
"River." Saying her name out loud caused his stomach to dip painfully.
"Octavia used to talk about a girl called River." Clarke told Bellamy. He looked to her in surprise. "I'm so sorry." She whispered. Bellamy looked down, avoiding her gaze. So it was true. No one had seen River. She was dead.
Bellamy rose, dusting the dirt off his trousers and walked away, wanting to be alone. Clarke called after him but he ignored her. He just wanted to be alone.
He remembered her long dark hair that she always wore in an intricate braid down her back and the way her warm honey coloured eyes used to light up when she laughed. Dead. He would never see those eyes again.
He remembered her sarcastic humour and the way she would call him out on everything, never letting him win the argument. Dead. They would never argue again.
He remembered the way she could keep a secret, never telling a soul she knew of Octavia's existence, always standing loyally by his side. Gone. Never would his sister see her best friend again.
He remembered her looking after his mother when she became more and more scared. The way she would be the one to braid Octavia's hair or give her old dresses that didn't fit anymore. She was dead.
Bellamy entered his tent and fell on his uncomfortable bed, raking his hands through his hair. She was dead. There was nothing he could do. And it was all his fault.
Another week past, and Bellamy taught himself to live with the crippling pain that resided in his chest. Sure, he used to think about her when they first arrived on earth, but his top priority was always to look after Octavia. To try and live to the next sunrise. There wasn't much time for him to dwell over the ones he had left behind. He couldn't be weak, he had to keep moving forward. As long as he kept moving, it didn't hit him. But now all he had was time to think about her. To wonder what actually happened to her, what her final thoughts were. If, in her final moments, she forgave him.
He did all her could not to think about her. He went on hunting trips, water duty, lookout. Anything to distract himself. But what was to happen next no one could predict. No one could have saw it coming. What was to happen next, stunned people into the most absolute silence.
Bellamy left with Clarke, Lincoln, Monty and a bunch of other armed men and woman into the forest. Those who were stupid enough to go further than allowed confessed but claimed they found something. They asked Bellamy and Clarke to investigate because they said they heard screaming. Possibly someone was locked in an underground bunker or god knows what. But it was enough for them to admit to breaking the rules, which no one really did since there weren't many rules on earth. Bellamy found the whole thing a little strange. Who would be screaming? There was no one missing from camp. They had made sure of that, gathering everyone for a meeting, getting everyone to check that everybody was accounted for. Everyone was in Camp Jaha, which caused Bellamy to be very curious about what lay deep into the forest.
They followed the directions the delinquents gave them. Each person walking slowly and quietly, listening out for the screaming that was claimed to be heard. When night began to fall, a few men grumbled out how 'there was nothing here' and how this mission was 'a waste of bloody time'. Again, Bellamy ignored them.
But when dark completely fell (he and the others had every intention to stay the night in the woods) they finally heard it. At first it was so faint. A trick maybe because he was tired after a long day. But the second piercing scream was no mistake. Clarke and Bellamy looked to one another and without a moment's hesitation, sprinted in the direction the terrified scream was coming from, guns ready to shoot at any moment.
The scream came again, louder this time and adrenaline soared through his veins. He pushed his legs to move faster, his heart accelerating in his chest. When the third scream came, it was from behind him. Confused but determined, he continued to run with his team following close behind him. Beside him, Clarke stopped and called his name and he turned panting for breath.
"It's coming from underneath us, I think." She told him and they listened for the next scream. It came almost instantly and they went back the way they came. Clarke was right. It was coming from right here but there was nothing but trees and muddy forest ground. He ordered for everyone to search the ground, looking for a handle or a cave of some sort. Everyone was whispering and the scent of adrenaline was crisp in the air. People were scared. They should be. No one knew what to expect.
Monty found it and quietly called everyone over. It was under a pile of leaves, a handle that pulled up with everyone's help and below was a ladder. The team froze, eyeing each other warily, their breaths coming out in short pants and wheezes. Bellamy grabbed his radio and quietly reported back to Raven their findings. The scream came again, expect this time it was much, much louder. It was coming from beneath the ladder. The scream was piercing, one masked in high surges or fear. It was only then when Bellamy realised it was screaming words.
"HELP! IS THERE SOMEONE UP THERE?" It killed Bellamy hearing someone in so much fear and he didn't hesitate for a second.
"Who's down there?" He called, but quietly, just in case. A few people had stood guarding around Monty, Bellamy and Clarke who were peering into the ladder.
"HELP PLEASE! PLEASE HELP ME BEFORE THEY COME BACK! PLEASE!"
"I'm coming down!" Bellamy told the petrified voice and Clarke cast him a cautious look.
"It could be a trap." She whispered.
"But what if it isn't? What if someone is trapped down there?" he told her, nervous but determined to save the person below. She nodded.
"Okay. But I'm coming too."
"Okay." He agreed, not in the mood to argue. "You two! Guard the entrance of the ladder. You and Monty keep watch in the trees." He ordered, helping Clarke get into position to climb down the ladder.
"Monty, give me your torch." Clarke said, reaching out and thanking him with a smile. Bellamy rolled his eyes, there was no time.
"QUICKLY!" The girl screamed again from underneath. Clarke hurried down the ladder, Bellamy right behind her as they were swallowed by darkness. The ladder was long and seemingly went on forever. He heard the soft thud of Clarke reaching the bottom.
"Oh my God." He heard her whispered in disgust. He moved quicker.
He couldn't believe his eyes. Inside was a small room with one or two candles and the torch that Clarke held in her hand. There were cabinets throughout the room littered with what looked at a brief glance, surgery equipment. But what lay in the middle of the room caused Bellamy to almost fall to his knees.
Right there, on a surgery table lying on her back was the girl he hadn't stopped thinking about. The girl he had mourned over. She lay drenched in sweat, panting horribly and shaking in cold and fear. Her hair was matted and greasy, her few clothes covered in grime and most shockingly of all, lots of sticky blood. The girl turned as best she could from being strapped down on the table and when she saw her rescuers she squinted, not believing her eyes. But when she saw Bellamy she froze and a heart wrenching sob filled the small room.
"Bellamy?" She sobbed, her hands clenched in fists by her side. Bellamy froze, unable to do anything but stare.
"River." He breathed and rushed over to her side.