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Disclaimer: I dont own Matt, Amy or the WWF. Emma Bunton owns the song.
**I know that you can hear
The rhythm of the rain
Although we're miles apart
I know you feel my pain**
Matt drummed his fingers on the steering wheel to the beat of the music. The rain was puring down on his windshield, his wipers making a squeeking sound as they worked their way across the front window, clearing a path for my Matt's eyes to see out on to the road through.
He was driving alone to their next destination, Jeff teaming with Adam, and Amy driving with Trish. He was relieved in a way because he had a lot on his mind, and Matt found that some of his best thinking was done when he was alone.
The thoughts that were swirling around Matt's head were giving him a headache. He hadn't been sleeping very well lately, worried about the direction his life was headed in. Not long after Team Xtreme started this new storyline, Matt and Amy had decided to break off their relationship, the strain this new story was having on them too much to bear. It had looked liked a mutual decision, but Matt now wished he had told Amy how he really felt. He had walked out on the best thing in his life, and now he was regretting it. He only wanted Amy to be happy, and since they had decided to just be friends Amy had been happier than Matt had seen her in a long time.
**I try to be so strong
I try to carry on
But since you left
The sun don't seem to shine **
It wasn't like their relationship wasn't a good one, they just made better friends, being like brother and sister suited them just fine, or so everyone thought. Jeff saw the way Matt looked at Amy when she wasn't looking, the way Matt's eyes lit up every time she entered a room, and the way he spoke about their relationship, his voice filled with love and pride.
Matt had often asked Jeff if it was normal to feel this way about his ex, seeing as though she was so happy, yet he never really expected an answer that would haunt his thoughts quite like Jeff's last one did. Jeff had told him that it was normal, and until Matt went out there and met someone new, these thoughts would continue to haunt him.
As much sense as it made, Matt couldn;t get past Amy. How could her life be so happy and Matt's be so miserable?
**My tears are falling
On the words
You wrote to me
I wish that somehow
They could take me
Where I wanna be**
As Matt turned the car into another street, a silent tear slid down his cheek. They continued to fall until he couldn't make out what was rain and what was his own tears. Matt had never felt like this before, never been so emotional about a lost love, or whatever it was they called it these days. He liked to think of it as love gone wrong. If it had gone wrong, it was never meant to be...right?
The tears continued to fall as Matt remembered some of the times he and Amy had together, wishing that right now, he was with her, in her arms, instead of crying alone on the way to another city.
**It seems so long ago
You held me when I cried
For now I just pretend
You're by my side, oh yeah **
It did seem so long ago now that Matt and Amy were the happiest couple in the WWF. It seemed so long ago that they were in love. He still loved her, he always would. Amy had shown Matt a side of himself he never knew even existed. She taught him how to live without thinking, act on impulses, something he had never been able to do before she entered his life.
Now he found himself being plain old Matt again, not taking too many chances, afraid of the memories that they would bring him. Now Amy was not there to ease his pain and fear away.
**Everything that
I touch turns to blue
When I'm living in
A world without you
I'm going crazy baby
I am missing you
Can't imagine
All I go through
When I'm living in
A world without you**
Matt never thought he would have to live in a world without Amy. The heartache and pain was killing him. He tried to shake it off, but it was like learning to swim; once you learn it's hard to forget. It definitely was hard to forget what the love he and Amy had shared was like, but he didn't want to forget. Matt wanted that love to live on forever, through him.
As he pulled into the hotel parking lot, he saw Amy and Trish get out of their car. He continued to watch her as he got out of the car and pulled his bag out. As he saw Trish leave to check in, leaving Amy outside on her own, he stepped into the shadows, not wanting her to know he was there.
He watched as Amy spotted his trademark black porsche, walking towards it slightly. She never noticed Matt standing in the shadows as she ran her hand over the boot, quickly taking her hand off to wipe away the tears escaping her eyes like a waterfall. She looked around for any signs of Matt, turning sadly and walking back to meet Trish in the lobby.
Matt stepped out of the shadows, somewhat relieved yet confused that he was not the only one dealing with these feelings; Amy could feel it too.
**I'm not alone I know
That you can feel it too
La la la la la la la
I try and watch a movie
But you're all that I can see
(All that I can see)
And in my dreams I know
I always see you constantly
But then the dream comes
To an end and I'm alone
And now I can't seem to
Let this feel go, oh baby **
Once again, Matt did not sleep a wink. He could't help but see the images of Amy crying at his car every time he closed his eyes. Should he talk to her? Would she admit to it or say he was just in denial?
**Everything that
I touch turns to blue
When I'm living in
A world without you
I'm going crazy baby
I am missing you
Can't imagine
All I go through
When I'm living in
A world without you**
Finally deciding it was too hot to sleep, Matt got up and grabbed his swimmers, heading for the pool. It was still open, he could see the lights on from his room. When he reached the pool, he didn't look twice at the girl lounging in the icy water ahead of him.
Only when she spoke to him did he look up at her, mesmorised by her natural beauty. They spoke for a long time, about everything and nothing all at once. He smiled genuinely at her, something he hadn't been able to do for some time now.
While his head was starting to clear of the thoughts of Amy, she still plagued his mind. She always would, as the one who made him believe, in love, life and himself. He soon found himself thinking about his future almost as much as his past, but that red haired daredevil stayed put in his mind.
He didn't know what to do, he probably never would, he just had to keep his head held high, remembering that the future can only happen if you get out of the past.