With thanks to MyLadyScribbler from whose work NCIS Internal Memos I got the memo concept.
From: Human Resources Division.
To: All NCIS Employees. (Please someone print this for special agent Gibbs).
Subject: The New Year.
Date: New Year's Eve. Time: 11:59 pm.
Dear colleagues,
As the new year approaches Human Resources would like to remind you of some things you need to be aware of as you go about your daily duties as a member of this organization.
Maybe you could incorporate them in your resolutions!
1. Holiday decorations are allowed but should be minimal unless you're Ms Sciuto.
2. Autopsy and the MCRT truck should only be used for their intended purpose! Note: New security cameras have recently been installed in certain areas.
3. Demonstration of and training in weaponry (incl. knives)should occur under controlled circumstances and in appropriate locations. The evidence garage is not an approved venue.
4. For those who might be confused the conference room does not move between floors.
5. Any public comment on cases should be cleared by the Director, your team leader, Legal and the Public Affairs Office unless you're writing 'fiction' about it.
6. Attendance at Ms Sciuto's Halloween Party is mandatory (with costume). As we are all happier when she's not reminding us how she can kill and leave no forensic traces please, please, please start planning now!
7. Super gluing a colleague's hands or slapping them on the back of the head is assault however 'affectionately' it's done.
8. Communicate respectfully with your co-workers. Avoid nicknames, idioms, shrugging, pointing and grunting. Always ask before you hug! This is NOT aimed at any particular team.
9. It is very clear in all documentation that the job title is Special Agent.
10. In the event of a building evacuation being required due to flood, fire, car bomb from grief crazed psychopath etc. DO NOT TAKE THE ELEVATOR! It's common sense 101.
Have A Happy New Year! (if you really must).
Human Resources.