I had a pretty good life. A home. A boyfriend. Friends. Then the universe proclaimed, "Shirra, I shall now screw you over."
Goodbye home.
Goodbye boyfriend.
Goodbye friends.
It was off to the Pound for me. Oh, excuuuuse me. "Adopt R Us." Right. Same Shit, Different Name. SSDN.
For some reason, having everything you cared about ripped out from under your feet tends to make you cynical, sarcastic, and downright untrusting. Go figure. I started life as a Legecia; something akin to a unicorn with its horn broken off halfway. Someone adopted me, put me through the Zapper a few times, and turned me into a nice pink Dawn Legecia. Now I was a bright pink unicorn with a broken horn. Oh, I guess I wasn't messed up in the head to begin with; I have to be some freak's guinea pig in a Laboratory. They typed up a short spiel about me and put me back in the pound, thinking that maybe with a shiny new color, I'd be more attractive to people who were looking to adopt a pet.
Not… exactly. At least not the second time around. I got adopted again, zapped some more, and got an even worse deal then before. The Zapper changed my damn gender, making me male, and turned me into a Dawn Illumis. Oh thank you so friggin much for the gender crisis on top of the identity crisis you jerk! Okay, so now I'm a gigantic bright pink firefly with a butt that could light up a room.
In case you didn't know, the Zapper is basically this big machine with the ability to change our form, color and gender. One zap ever four hours or so. It doesn't hurt, but it does feel incredibly strange to feel your body shifting and changing, inside and out. And don't ask about gender changes… please… that's more shades of wrong than I can describe.
Not inclined to think highly of the whole 'third time's the charm' spiel those motivational speakers try to shove down our throats, I ignored everyone until a blonde human knelt in front of me. She glanced at the name and information hanging outside the large cage I was confined in.
"Perfect." She smiled at me.
"Perfect what?" I demanded.
"I've been searching for over an hour for someone who drew my eyes. You're it."
"In case you didn't notice, I'm a little off kilter."
"What, you mean your gender?" she arched an eyebrow at me. "That can be fixed, if you're willing to experience the Zapper for a little while."
"Lady, what the hell do you think got me into this mess?"
She gave me a funny little smile, and then said, "I'll make a deal with you then. Endure the zapper until you're female again and I'll turn you into whatever species and color you want."
I grunted. "Fine. Lilac Irion. At least until something better comes out."
"Deal." The human took a plushie out of a carrying tote and smiled at my dumbfounded expression. A Mystical Montre Plushie nestled in her hands. "Use." She commanded and tossed it lightly into the air.
There was a soft flash of light and a hum of magic before the plushie vanished completely. I couldn't make myself move; my eyes wide and my mouth having fallen open. She used a fifty million Subeta Point item on…me? Whispered the stunned part of my brain.
Don't be stupid; hissed another part of me, she would have used it on someone else just as easily.
The human smiled at my still dumbfounded expression. "My name is Alkuna." She greeted me, and unlatched the door to my pen.
"Shirra," I finally managed to say, getting to all six of my feet. I may be an Illumis right now, but I didn't trust those fragile insect wings with supporting my body.
Getting to my new home proved to be easier than I feared. My new owner called a Dark Matter Kumos over. He introduced himself as Mercolo and gave me a lift on his back. That was… an experience…
You'd think Dark Matters were fleas the way they swarmed around and in his fur. They didn't seem to object to me hitching a ride, but it gave me a creepy crawly feeling when they floated up to investigate me, and proceeded to perch in various spots on my armored insect body. Okay, I know it's silly for a giant firefly to bitch about creepy crawlies, but there you go.
I changed species a number of times before the zapper finally made me a girl again. However, by then Alkuna had gotten me an Irion Elixir and a Lilac Potion.
It took a little getting used to. For one thing, Irions are quite large compared to the Illumis, and a lot bulkier compared to the Sheeta form I had briefly taken on. And learning to fly…. Eesh. Try to imagine a purple gryphon the size of a small horse flapping around in your back yard and jumping off of things trying to get lift. Fortunately, a Lain named Quitzel was in the house to give me lessons on how to use my wings.
I was not looking forward to school.
Wait. That's stupid.
Nobody ever looks forward to going to school. Between the drama queens and the brainless thugs… I mean jocks… Coupled together with pissy teachers, idiotic assignments and homework designed to motivate the suicide ratings to an all time high, no one would willingly subject themselves.
Yet today I felt like I was standing on the last line of all that was good and pleasant, and peering over the brink into the abyss of what was to become Total Shit Day.
My short stint of getting used to my new form had put me behind a bit, at least as far as learning the layout of the campus. Finding the office was thankfully easy enough. The office lady, a frumpy Marsh Popoko with limp, unkempt fur took my name and flipped through pages before finding it.
"Of course," she said blandly, "Have a seat." She gestured with a halfhearted flip of her paw at an uncomfortable looking bench.
I was rapidly on my way to becoming bored as well as uncomfortable when I heard the sound of claws on the floor.
I admit, I thought I knew what every pet sounded like. Tick-tack-tick-tack was the bird-like Lain. A light click-click-click-click was the brisk step of the wolf-like Kumos. And the very light, very faint ticka-ticka sound was the light tread of the squirrel-like Popoko.
Clack. Clack. Clack. Both the sound of claws and the tread of feet bewildered me; it was very heavy. Heavy, deliberate and powerful.
My eyes nearly popped out of my head as a wall of pure muscle walked through the office door. My eyes darted up to see a broad, dragon-like head decorated with dazzling blue frills at the back of the predatory skull. They called this an Experiment #8001, a rare form that could only be gotten by a zap from the Pet Zapper V.2. The thing that struck me the hardest though, beyond the muscles, sharp teeth and spikes, were the eyes.
A frigid blue, and colder than any Glacier Potion, they were perfectly bisected by what looked more like black obsidian needles than pupils.
The Popoko went rigid in her chair, showing more animation for this predatory fellow than she'd had for me. Not that I could blame her. Pound for pound, he outweighed even me; for all that I'm taller when standing up.
"I am here for Shirra." The words were clipped, spoken in a deep male baritone with a kind of nifty British accent.
The Popoko flicked a finger at me and that head turned around to face me. I felt the gaze pierce right through me and for a split second, I felt like a very small Wyllop pinned before a very large Tigrean. Then he blinked and the spell was broken.
"Very well then. My name is Hexavier. I'm here to show you to your first class."
Seriously? I thought, half-frantic. Not to… I don't know; use me in Home Ec. as the next meal? Flambé a la Irion? But I nodded to him and picked up my backpack, already loaded with textbooks. "I'm Shirra, as I guess you already know."
He nodded slightly. "You're the one Mum picked up the other day. Sorry 'bout not meeting you 'till now."
"Wait… you're my… brother?"
"You can call me that if you like, though none of us are truly related except Lacoda and Silverserri." Gallantly, he opened the classroom door for me.
The teacher raised a strict eyebrow when we entered, but after asking for our names, she nodded curtly. "Have a seat you two, though I expect you to be on time hereafter. Your late pass is for today and today only."
I did my best to ignore the whispers that sparked as we entered and took our seats. Despite his intimidating appearance, he seemed friendly enough, if a bit formal. I supposed it was something to brood upon when I wasn't wrestling with arithmetic.
The bell rang, and he was there as I scrambled to put my stuff away. He showed me to my next class before vanishing to get to his own. Hexavier was there all day, and though we only shared two classes, he was sure to meet me and lead me to my next class all throughout the day.
Every class broke out in whispers at his brief appearance at the doors. It made my feathers ruffle, though I could never quite pick out what they were whispering about. Not that I needed to. School is a notorious nest for the vermin, and sooner or later, it was going to be a rather horrendous confrontation over a rumor.
Lunchtime was an uncomfortable affair. I hadn't made any friends to sit with. Hex –a nickname he gave me permission to use– was a gentleman and invited me to join him and Rask, a Dark Matter Magnus. I took them up on the offer; I didn't like the way the girls were eyeing me.
Rask was another tough guy, but they both included me in their conversation, which apparently sported the topic of a head cheerleader named Vaishi.
"Watch out for her, Shirra," Rask warned, "She waits for the world to revolve around her and then gets very vindictive when it doesn't."
"Aye," Hex rumbled deep in his chest, "still hasn't forgiven me for turning her down."
"Won't believe you're serious either." Rask took a bite of sandwich.
"What does she look like?" I asked warily.
"Dragarth," Hex said around a mouth full of apple, then swallowed and cleared his throat before clarifying, "Lilac I think is her current month's color. Build and grace of a dancer, but none of the beauty where it counts, if you know what I mean."
He walked me to girl's gym and gave me a low, cautionary growl in my feathered ear, "Watch yourself now. She's got gym this period too. Fifty-fifty chance she's in yours as much as the other."
"I know my luck and how this will turn out," I said miserably, and approached the teacher, a Sun Velosotor with a whistle around her neck.
She assigned me to a number on the floor and put us through some warm up exercises as we stood in neat little numbered rows.
"Four leggers, I want ALL your limbs working!" the teacher barked, "Let me see those wings move too people! This is not a foot stomping session; this is a warm up for the whole body! Let's go! Let's go!"
I gave a surreptitious look around and with a sinking heart saw what could only be Vaishi, performing her stretches perfectly and smoothly. My joints popped as the new muscles protested the stretches I was undergoing.
"All right, rest!"
I was not the only one to groan softly in relief as we all stood up straight.
"We're doing laps this week," the teacher announced, ignoring the groans or sighs of relief, depending on the student. "The track is half a mile long for a full lap. You will be doing four laps. Running, jogging, or power walking is up to you, but the faster you go, the shorter time it will take you to complete. Begin!"