Kawaii-Hello! I've been getting a few reviews of continuing 'What is Love?' into a story. Check out my other story 'Desire Climax' which features one-shots of Amu and Ikuto.
Ikuto-Yay, I don't know what's gonna happen but IT BETTER BE GOOD.
Amu-If you make me a slut, imma kill you.
Kawaii-Hey, hey, hey! When was I ever hostile?
Amu-Kawaii does not own Shugo Chara.
Is love a blessing or is it a curse? Does it bring happiness or does it bring sadness? It makes us feel touched by the solicitude given by our lover. It makes us feel greedy by being alone. Love is a terrifying thing masked in beauty. We are too blind to see the truth hidden behind the facade that is playing.
The world is a cruel place of games and lies. Where people rise and people fall, where people live and people die. But when caught in love's web, they will not survive. Pulled away from a tranquil life. Pulled away from a tragic life.
Love is worse than that. Love is hate that few will understand. Love is a puzzle that few will solve. Love is a game that many win and many lose. Love is a secret that few will know. Love is pleasure that everyone will get.
Love is pain that tears us apart but brings us together. Love is everything and love is nothing. Love leaves the choices to you and controls you completely. Love binds us. Love is a simple shadow that people fall into. Love is strange. Love is hell. Love is heaven.
Love is a beautiful pain.
"Let's end this, we hardly see each other anyways." He stood up sighing, my eyes followed him.
"Sure." My lips moved to agree, I didn't care. Why would I care? I don't even like him.
"Later then." My favorite kind of break-up. Simple, short, and to the point. Easy, it was never a serious relationship. Well maybe for him it was. The door to the small cafe closed followed by the light tinkling of the bells. I leaned back, yawning, and looked at the ceiling.
"Hinamori-san, would you like another cup of tea?" I sat up straight again to look at the waitress, Kaede. She looked solemnly at me. Her eyes had...pity in them. It pisses me off to be pitied by a person who just got her first boyfriend. As if she knew what love really is.
"Yeah, thanks." Just keep calm, not everyone knows what love is. I smiled as she came back holding a cup of tea."Hinamori-san, if you stay here too long then people may find out who you are." She whispered.
"I'll leave soon." Suddenly a man slid into the empty seat in front of me. He was also wearing sunglasses, however the suit he wore made him look like he was part of the yakuza*. (A.N. Yakuza is the Japanese Mafia. Can also mean being part of a separate underground business in the black market.)
"Hinamori-san, we can't have a famous artist like you sitting here blankly in a public café." It was the familiar husky voice of Tsukiyomi Ikuto, the man who bought my paintings.
"I apologize, Tsukiyomi-san," I sarcastically start,"I can go wherever I want, you are simply a prized customer." He peers at me above his sunglasses looking surprised and amused.
"Very well, Hinamori-san," he rolls my name off his tongue and his lips form to curve his trademark smirk."As a company owner, I am well aware and concerned about your reputation if you are seen in public...like this..."
"You should be concerned about your well being as well, Tsukiyomi-san. The media will go nuts if they see you in public...like this..." I mocked his tone, he let out a laugh and clapped his hands.
I sipped my tea, carefully eyeing him. Was he a man who took love seriously? No. He seemed more like a man who could have a one-night stand and forget about it the next day. He seemed more like a player. He seemed more like a carefree lover. He seemed more like the lover who didn't care about you.
Wouldn't it be perfect? A one-night stand, simple, easy, straightforward, and easy to soho off. Perfect. Nothing is perfect. Love is not perfect. I lifted the teacup to my lips and sipped the steaming liquid.
His gaze was upon me, his cat-like eyes watching my every movement. It mystified me, his eyes so sharp. His lips, his everything. I wanted him. He seemed so powerful. High and mighty. King.
He cleared his throat as if he was going to consecrate something extremely important to the world (especially the ones that went to church).
"When will your next painting be out?" Ah. Is that the only thing we can discuss about so easily? My paintings. My job. Your job. It's like a single rose petal fluttering down. Like it hitting the surface of still water. Your words hit me like stone.
Why? Why am I feeling so unsettled and bothered about this?
"Soon, why? You want to buy it?" I leaned back and let out a chuckle.
"Yes, of course. Your paintings hold some sort of emotion that is indescribable. They seem so sad, yet full of feelings that scream out at me." Ikuto chuckled as well, I closed my eyes and took another sip of tea, once I opened them I met his gaze.
It was alluring, provoking, unsettling, mysterious, and gentle.
Gentle.
It was years since I've met a man's gaze with gentleness in his eyes. It's as if he could read me, my thoughts, my heart, my secrets, the truth.
"Why thank you, you seem to understand my paintings well." I set the empty tea cup down.
Without me noticing, he had a glass of water in front of him. There was a piece of lemon floating on the surface. It smelled sweet, its citrus scent wafting in the air. Again he continued to gaze at me with those elegant eyes.
He reached over and put his hand on mine. I was surprised. His hand was warm, big, protective... It was warm, not cold...
"Amu." My name. I stopped. He said my name.
My name. Amu. How long has it been since someone uttered my given name? The way he said it, he made my name sound like silk.
"You always look lonely-" That was it. I apologize for my brazen decision. Without thinking I leaned over the table, grabbed his tie, and kissed him.
With lips still locked, I opened my eyes slightly and met his gaze again. He looked surprised as I continued to kiss him.
Finally, I let him go. It was the first time in years that I felt lonely to part a kiss. I sat back down, hoping to still look calm. He looked surprised, very. A throbbing pain seized my heart.
Not a pain that made me cough or shout out. It was a suffocating pain that pressured me. I didn't want to remember my past. The pain of keeping my memories locked.
"Amu-" I cut him off. I could have a one-night stand, couldn't I? Couldn't I? With someone like him, it seemed like no big deal. I uttered the words I wished to take back instantly, I regret saying the words but at the same time I don't.
"Ikuto. Sleep with me. Just for one night..." And I said the one word that shocked even myself."Please." He just stared at me.
His gaze was calm, his warm hand still on mine."Ok, Amu."
Time Skip~
He kissed me passionately. Fiercly. Hotly. A battle between tongues, his hands reached for my buttons. I wrapped my arms around his neck, then released him. I removed his shirt to reveal a well built body.
He grabbed me. He kissed me. He kissed me again. He let me go. Then he pushed me down and stripped me of my clothing.
"You're so beautiful, Amu..." His warm lips locked with mine. I'm not beautiful, my heart is tainted black, I will not love, I am not beautiful inside. However I ignored the strong throbbing pain and let him explore my body.
"Hah..." I shivered as he squeezed my breasts, rolling my nipple in his mouth. Pinching the other with his finger. It felt good. Better than the men i had before.
I knew I was getting wet. The way he touched my body, gently, but impatiently, made me shiver in pleasure and surprise. He spread my legs and rubbed his fingers rubbed against me. He plunged in one, then another making me moan out in surprise.
My hands were clutching onto his shoulder, hard."Is this your sensitive spot?" He chuckled and swirled his fingers around.
"S-Stop teasing me..." My voice was pleading. I had never said this before. Not even with him... So what am I doing now? He slowly slid out his fingers and licked them. No one had done that. My face goes scarlet.
"Sweet..." He whispered. He had his face close to mine,"Amu...for 10 years I have loved you, even when you had Tadase and other men. For years I have loved you, and I will make you mine."
I froze at his words. He loves me...I can't love him. I lifted my hands to push him away but he lifted my legs and rubbed his erection against me.
"No, stop-" too late. He slid himself in making me shudder again and let out a moan."Amu...I love you." I'm drowning in the pleasure he's giving me. The ecstasy of being with him like this.
I'm drowning in the guilt of his saying these words to me. That he still loved me when I was with Tadase and other men. I can't think anymore. He thrust himself in hard, it feels good. But his words and pleasure make my head cloudy.
He continued ram himself in and kisses me. I keep moaning as he repeats the words 'I love you'.
"I-Ikuto! I'm gonna-!" We both came. He was hot and thick, his cum inside me.
"I'm sorry, today is a safe day right?" He whispers, his voice huskier than ever. My heart nearly skips a beat. There's something wrong with me. I can't push him away. I can't do anything. What is going on. There's something very wrong.
"Yeah..." I gasp out, it's been a long time since I had a good sex. My mind trails off to the words he said to me. How can I love anyone. I'm a dirty woman, I'm not clean. I don't want to love. I want to run and scream. Scream out of anger, scream because I am getting love. And I don't what any love.
Ikuto hugs me, an unfamiliar warmth fills me and surrounds me. He tilts my chin and kisses me again. A gentle kiss, a kiss so unfamiliar it makes me cry. I'll falling into a sweet darkness. I don't want any love, but I cannot deny his passion.
Midnight~
Here Ikuto is sleeping and I am sitting, staring at him. I feel like a pervert... Damn. I gaze at his sleeping face, silky sapphire hair, chiseled facial features, everything about him seemed perfect.
The words he said to me. I love you. Are they true? Did his words hold lies or the truth? My head is cloudy and I can't think. My head hurts, the throbbing pain becomes stronger. I have questions but no answers, answers but no questions.
Ikuto...what is the truth and what are the lies?
Amu-For once, I like your stories. The sex is not hardcore, good job.
Ikuto-Ah, Amu's just shy!
Kawaii-Ahaha! First chapter complete. Thank you for the requests of making this chapter into a separate story. I will try my best!
Amu-Anyways, at least I'm smart
Ikuto-Really?
Kawaii-Make sure to review and tell me what you think!