To Irene Adler he was always that man. I have seldom heard her mention him by any other name (prior to our encounter). Most importantly in his eyes (our Professor) he eclipses and predominates the whole of man's intellectuality. In her eyes he is an investment. Our employer did not hate Sherlock Holmes, in fact he rather found him very amusing. A man of equal intellectual capabilities, perfect reasoning and cold precise balanced minds. Irene, at first, did not care much of who Sherlock was, but she fancied his demeanour. A man on par to our Moriarty is equally terrifying and appealing. Irene never met the man, but she heard stories; the case of the Baskerville Hound, Copper Breeches, and the Dancing Men. Remarkable to the observer, however to an avid listener such as Irene they seemed polished. Some cases amazed her, she wasn't one to emit her fascination but she was interested, and listened intensively. She was always listening, she did not conform to the norms of conversing with others unless it had purpose. She did not like to chit-chat but she loved gossip. She first heard of Holmes through gossip evidently it is also where she first learned of Moriarty, our employer and whom we call the Professor. There's was always a venomous aura surrounding Moriarty, Irene kept her distance, she never dared stray too close to Moriarty for too long, as to accidently reveal too much about her herself. Mr. Holmes peeked her interest, and upon our first encounter with that man, he was everything Moriarty claimed him to be.
I have not seen Miss Adler in some time, she was a lovely woman, with a face a man might die for. I wager this time was different from our other encounters. Miss Adler approached Moriarty rather than vice versa, for a problem she encountered in Bohemia. She calls it her 'Scandal in Bohemia', the title alone indulged myself to plea to Moriarty to let me work this case with her. I saw it as an opportunity to become more acquainted with Miss Adler, seeing as Professor M. witnessed her potential I wanted to see it again for myself. Unfortunately for me, she worked quickly, and precise, straight to the point and our adventure lead to a short story of no more than roughly 2000 words or so.
Upon my arrival in London I was told to meet Irene at a little restaurant on Baker Street. This was obvious even to myself. Sherlock has never seen myself or Irene and it was clear she was here to possibly grasp an image of the great detective.
"Meeting here to hopefully catch a glimpse of Mr. Holmes?" I said as I sat down.
"Quite the observant one aren't we Sherlock" She responded with a sneer without taking her eyes off the paper upon the table. "It appears you haven't worked recently with our Professor," she remarked.
"I think you may be having troubles at home with the mistress too."
"And what makes you think that?" I answered. Irene was no detective, but she was very observant and her talent to reason was remarkable.
"We have worked together before, and each visit we meet at a restaurant to debrief the case yes?"
"Yes?"
"On many occasions I have had the pleasure of familiarising myself with every facet of information on your routinely habits." "Being the Professor's lackey, for better terms, he pays you well, along with your other career fondling with the enamel-coated structures of other people's jaws.."
"Dentistry" I interrupted to correct her.
"Don't interrupt." "You usually arrive with a posh manner, with your own personal landau, sit down and immediately order a glass of their finest." She smirked. "You did no such thing upon our encounter, and if I witnessed correctly you paid the coachman upon your arrival, and not handsomely either. No detective work required, merely observation"
"Astonishing, it has been almost a year since our last encounter and yet you remember such fine details. True, the Professor has not been in need of my services and it has been slow at the office. But, how did you know about my problems at home… with my wife, not my mistress may I correct you once again."
"Perfume" she replied
"Perfume?"
"Precisely, you more often than not reek of a stale perfume your woman uses, I can only assume prior to your departure she embraces you, perhaps engage in coitus in fear you may be injured when you are dispatched by the Professor. I do not smell it. Quite frankly, I do not understand what such a caring woman sees within a man such as yourself, you are pretty much a dog, tall, but lanky, handsome, but…"
"Thank You, Irene. Remarkable as always you impress me then lose my amazement through insults."
She interrupted me, "I have a villa we may reside in here in London at Briony Lodge, let's make haste as I debrief my case."
Once acquainted with the area of Miss Adler's home at Briony Lodge, she told me not to stay there but to frequently visit to keep her informed on anything mischievous happening around London. Upon my visit she explained her current predicament and why she sought out Moriarty's help. An affair with the King of Bohemia is surely no joke. The King was chasing her for a photo that they took together, he was to be married and feared Irene would use the photo to black-mail him. At that part of the story she smirked as if it was entirely possible she thought about it. The King had made several attempt to retrieve the photograph, 5 attempts to be exact. She feared the next attempt would either be murder, or her second thought which was spot on, that he would seek the help of Sherlock Holmes. Upon that thought she contacted our Professor to gain details of the detective. Moriarty devised a compromise, he would warn Irene the moment he hears Sherlock is on the case, as long as she gains more information about the detective for Moriarty's sake. Of course, she agreed on this simple proposition.
As time went by I managed to become acquainted with the area fairly well. Under a stage name as Mr. Godfrey Norton I became known around the mews surrounding her villa as "the gentleman that visits often." I often spoke with the people and they knew me well, they knew Miss Adler too as she was so beautiful, and sang equally as beautifully that people would often just loiter around to listen. It was just another day, I was on my way to visit Miss Adler, I had told her about a beautiful church where it would be a fantastic spot to get married. Upon reaching her house, I could see Irene pacing back and forth through the large bay window out front. As I entered she quickly ran towards me and informed me of what she heard, that some poor sap is asking about her and myself Mr. Norton. We both understood this must be Sherlock in disguise. Quickly Irene thought of a plan, she told me to travel to Gross & Hankey's and ask for a man called Stewart and then to meet her at the St. Monica's Church, the same church I talked about. While she flurried around, and made no response to my questions I hurried out the house and was on my way.
'Drive like the devil,' I shouted, 'first to Gross & Hankey's in Regent Street, and then to the Church of St. Monica in the Edgeware Road. Half a guinea if you do it in twenty minutes!'
Moments later Miss Adler left her villa "The Church of St. Monica, John," she cried, "and half a sovereign if you reach it in twenty minutes."
We arrived at the church nearly at the same moment. Still confused on what the hustle was about, she turned to my cab saw her friend and said "Father, it is of upmost importance that you aid me in my matters. This man is my true love, and we must be wed this second. My ex-husband is a vicious yet jealous man and he is on his way here as we speak, I wish to wed and depart from London as soon as possible to avoid any unfortunate causalities!" I had not noticed at first as I was constantly staring at my clock during the cab ride, but the man who I picked was indeed a priest! Without hesitation, he agreed and Irene yanked me inside.
"I am the one to be married?! Miss Adler as you know I am already mar—"
"Pay attention. Mr. Holmes is on his way here there is no mistaken he would not follow something so dramatic without questioning what was happening. He will soon enter this church, once he appears we will use him as a witness for our marriage due to some informality. We will go through with the ceremony as normal, and no we are not actually getting married!"
Merely a moment later a disgruntled looking fellow peered through the doors, it was Holmes. I rushed to his side and explained how we needed a witness for our wedding. The ceremony went on and once Irene and I made our false promises we left. Before leaving the church Irene gave Holmes a sovereign as gratitude for his help, this utterly confused me. Outside of the church Irene told me to split ways and to return to her villa at 7 sharp. I did not question her as her tone was stern and I did just as she said.
Upon arriving at her villa there was a flurry of people, and what looked like the doing of smoke that stained the living room window? I could see a group of silhouettes in the living room it was a severe panic. Just then the cab door opened and Miss Adler was sitting beside me.
"What is going on? Are you alright! Was there a fire?
"It is not actually on fire, come, to a secure space I will inform you of what happened here"
We reached the Inner Temple, where I resided for the time being, and Irene explained the so-called fire.
"First let me start at the wedding. I knew Mr. Holmes was following us, but I was not entirely sure what he wanted. Did he want the photograph, or did he wish to confront me and tell the King of my whereabouts. If the latter was the case he would not have agreed to be our best man. He would have retreated with a photographic memory of whom I associated myself with and keep the King constantly updated. Instead he agreed to the wedding, although he did look confused, meaning he was after the photograph and not myself."
"Ahh, but why did we need to use him as best man. I don't understand?"
"That was to get a better glimpse of the detective. He is surely a master of disguise, and through close inspection I still could not grasp a proper image of the gent. Thus I placed a marker on him."
"The sovereign!"
"Exactly! Having experienced such a strange series of events any man would wear the sovereign to remember. This came very useful in distinguishing Holmes at my villa. He made a very good distraction but the sovereign as planed gave him away." She was smiling the entire cab ride, staring blankly ahead as if she was re-living the moment that happened no more than 20 minutes past. "He started a brawl, and in the midst of the brawl he must have used some red paint to make it seem as if he was bleeding, being the lady everyone believed me to be of course I allowed him into my home. Here is where Holmes almost got me, his misogynistic views on woman played out perfectly."
I could see the anger in Miss Adler's face when she mentioned that last line.
"He had an accomplice" she continued. "Once the row broke out he had his accomplice toss a smoke-rocket and yell fire to start a panic. I did not foresee this action, it was so well played, and having another lady open the windows pretending he needed 'fresh air'. Once I saw the smoke I truly did panic, I instantly thought of the photo and rushed to claim it. Holmes predicted this, in the reflection of the mirror in which I hid the photo beside I saw his gleaming eyes staring right at me, no panic in his eyes but he seemed rather intrigued. He played me, and had me show him where the photograph was hidden. I had originally planned for us to leave tomorrow, but I rather leave tonight in the midst of the confusion."
We made on final stop at the villa before nightfall, she packed all her things and ransacked the house as if she was in a hurry.
"Why the rush?" I asked.
"I must catch Holmes, before he retreats into his chambers and award him my gratitude for such a well-played game of shadows." As she was speaking she sat down and began writing a letter.
Before leaving her villa, she went to her secret safe behind the bell-pull and retrieved the photo, and a stash of money. She replaced them with another photo of her in an evening dress and a letter.
"What are you leaving behind?"
"Another token of my gratitude, it's not every day a woman has the audacity and wits to outsmart the great Sherlock Holmes. I wish him to remember this gorgeous face. Now off to Baker Street, I desire to wish Mr. Holmes a good-night.
"What of the King," I asked. "Would he not continue his search for you?
"If my hunch is correct, Sherlock will bring the King and explain everything to him. The King believes I am an honest woman, which I am, and believes I would not dare risk the photograph being leaked to endanger my current marriage.
And that was how the great 'Scandal in Bohemia' came to an end. The best of Sherlock Holmes, beaten by the beautiful intellect of Irene Adler. When she speaks of Sherlock Holmes she no longer refers to him as that man, but merely Mr. Holmes.