Anders shuddered, and woke himself from slumber. His arm fell on the cold empty bed beside him and he felt a pang of sadness wash over him as he remembered the events of a night that felt so long ago.
Flashes of her piercing blue eyes and raven black hair flashed through his mind and he groaned quietly. Hawke. She was beautiful, and from the moment she had walked into his clinic she had taken his breath away. He had denied her for so long, pushing her away, keeping her safe from the vengeance that formed part of his very being. Then out of nowhere it had happened, he could remember the conversation now.
"I'm just a man. You can't tease me like this and expect me to resist forever".
"I don't want you to resist".
The kiss had been like electricity flying between them and he groaned again.
It had been so long ago. Where had the time gone? Where had she disappeared to? One night of fleeting passion and she had gone, leaving him with nothing to cling onto but fragments of memory and the loneliness.
"Hawke" he whispered slightly, bringing his arms around himself and rolling over to one side. Tears from his eyes glistened in the moonlight flowing in through the window and he closed his eyes in grief.
Every night was the same, but he had never stopped hoping that one day she would walk though that door again. The spirit inside his head whispered that she never would, that to be able to leave him so easily she obviously had no care for him. She had been just as he'd said, a distraction from their goal to pursue the freedom of mages. No, even if she came back now she must be scorned. She would not hurt us again.
Anders rolled off the bed, sleep would not come to him this evening, so there was no point lying here, caught up in dreams and wishful thinking. With a grunt he massaged one aching shoulder and walked into his clinic. It was never truly silent, there were always patients here and the even sound of their breathing calmed him. An odd noise at the door made him turn and his mouth opened in shock. Stood in front of him was a tall, dark sinned elf, his skin etched with flickers of silver. Dark eyes caught his own and the glint of mischief made Anders' breath catch in his chest. The figure crossed the room in four steps and pushed him back against the wall roughly. As he felt the wind knocked out of him the elf smirked and leaned close to his ear. "And still you wait".
Fenris' breath close to his ear sent a little chill down his spine and Anders bit his lip. The elf was handsome, and so dangerous. He took a deep breath that rattled softly in his ears and entwined a hand in the elf's white hair, pulling his head back and away from him. Fenris snarled in anticipation of the struggle and pulled away from Anders. "Take your hands off me mage".
That deep voice with its sullen manner could melt hearts, of that Anders was sure. He felt as if he had swallowed a lead weight. Aside from Hawke, Fenris had been the only other presence he could never shake from his mind.
"Why are you here Fenris? Another chance to gloat perhaps? Another attempt to get under my skin with cheap remarks about her? Well guess what, I've heard them all and I have heard just about enough from you".
"Somebody has a backbone tonight", Fenris snarled, looking Anders up and down as if he were eyeing up his prey. Anders suspected that might just be the case. "Why do you wait for her Anders? She left you, cold and alone. You lie here night after night, longing for her. Why?"
Anders didn't know. He dropped his eyes to the floor for a split second, and during his inattention the elf advanced on him again. He pinned the mage to the wall with one hand on his shoulder and looked deep in his eyes, searching for something. Anders desperately wanted to look away but he found himself trapped in those dark eyes. "I don't have the answers why Fenris, I just … can't let her go".
Fenris' eyes hardened and Anders wished he wasn't backed into a wall, he suspected that he was about to get pummelled. The damned elf thought that was the answer to everything. As Fenris moved Anders closed his eyes anticipating a punch that never connected, and instead he felt Fenris' lips collide with his own. Anders, senses exploded as he wrapped his arms around the slender elf, feeling the sinewy arms and body beneath his armour. Fenris moaned slightly under his breath and kissed Anders deeper, running his own hands over the mage's hips. Anders felt himself stiffen in response, and felt a pang of disappointment when Fenris pulled away. The elf bit his lip as a look of satisfaction crossed his face.
"You fucking tease" Anders growled.
Fenris raised an eyebrow and threw him a cocksure smile. "I just do not believe that your patients need any further entertainment from us". He smiled at the frustrated mage, "Come to me, later tonight. We will pick this up where we left off".
With that he spun on his heel and walked out of the door. He didn't even look back and Anders leaned against the wall to catch his breath. That damned elf he repeated to himself. As he thought it Justice stirred in his mind, aware that another distraction had just walked into Anders' life.