Drabble request: "Gilbert takes care of a drunk Ludwig."
"Elizaveta! You go get his pants, and I'll take him to the car. I think they're on the Ferris wheel."
"How did Ludwig's pants get on the Ferris wheel?"
"Do not fucking ask me, Jesus. Last time his socks wound up in France. I'm glad they're only on the Ferris wheel." Carrying a man almost twice your size wasn't easy, but over the years, Gilbert had mastered the technique.
There was an unspoken rule in their house: Gilbert and Ludwig could not be drunk at the same time.
Because of this, Oktoberfest was was a trade-off - on even years, Ludwig could get drunk. On odd years, it was Gilbert who could get drunk. This year was an even year. It was Ludwig's turn.
"Gilbert," Ludwig said gruffly as Gilbert hoisted him to their car. He practically stuffed him into the car.
"What."
"I'm hot."
"No."
"But-"
"No." Gilbert had him buckled in securely and then got into the car himself. He rolled down the window as Elizaveta came with Ludwig's pants.
"Are you sure you'll be alright?" she asked, looking over at Ludwig, who was in the process of unbuttoning his shirt. "I can get a sick bag from inside…"
Gilbert smiled at her reassuringly. "We'll be fine. I have a degree in this by now. Thank you. Next time we go out, we won't bring the baby." He glanced over at Ludwig and sighed. The shirt was off. "Well, toodles."
They drove off, Gilbert doing his best to focus on getting out of fucking Munich and back home. "Fucking hate this cit-" he stopped and almost slammed on the breaks when there was a hand starting to rapidly unbutton his jeans and "Jesus FUCK I am DRIVING, Ludwig, get the fuck off of me!" He slapped the hand away, expertly not veering off of the road.
Lesson 1 in obtaining a degree in Caring for Drunk Brothers: "How to Drive and Avoid being Molested 101"
"But Gilbert…"
"No. When we get home we can. I have to drive."
Ludwig shifted, leaning against the window. "'mhot."
"Then roll the window down."
Ludwig fumbled for about twenty seconds before he finally got the window down, and stuck his head outside. They, unfortunately, stopped at stoplight at that moment.
Gilbert could only see out of his perephral vision before Ludwig happened to see another car right next to them, windows also down.
"Helloooo~" he said to the unsuspecting victims in the black BMW next to them. "I am going to get laid tonight~"
Gilbert slowly closed his eyes.
It was going to be a long drive home.