A songfic by Lady Aishiteru
Disclaimer: Original lyrics by Aerosmith, and last time I checked, Yu Watase owns Fushigi Yugi, and Naoko Takeuchi owns Sailor Moon. There. 'Nuff said!
Opens with Seiya walking into a bar.
Cruised into a bar on the shore
Her picture graced the grime on the door
She a long lost love at first bite
Seiya notices a beautiful woman, who is wearing a Chinese dress with long, violet hair, and sipping a beer at a table.
Seiya: Wow! Check out the babe!
Baby maybe you're wrong but you know it's all right
That's right.
Nuriko: Hey, handsome! *motions for Seiya to come with finger*
Seiya: Oooh, baby! Hey, what's your name?
Nuriko: Nuriko.
Seiya: What a pretty name. I'm Seiya.
They walk, arm in arm, to an area backstage.(the bar has live music)
Back stage we're having the time
Of our lives until somebody says
Forgive me if I seem out of line
Seiya: Forgive me, but I couldn't help but to stare at your beauty.
Nuriko: *blushes and nods*
Seiya: Can I kiss you?
Nuriko: Okay.
They start to kiss
The she whipped out her gun
Tried to blow me away.
Seiya: *backs away* What's this pressing against my hips? Do you have a gun?
Nuriko: Eh heh heh...
Love put me wise to her love in disguise
She had the body of a venus
Lord, imagine my surprise.
Seiya: Um, before we go any further, I have to tell you something, Nuriko.
Nuriko: That's funny, I was about to say the same thing.
Seiya: I'm....not what you think.
Nuriko: You mean you're not Kou Seiya, the famous Japanese singer?
Seiya: No, that's not it.
Nuriko: Thank the gods. *whips off shirt*
Baby let me follow you down
Let me take a peek dear
Baby let me follow you down
Seiya: AGH! IT'S FLAT!
Nuriko: *pushes against Seiya's chest* Duh! Of course it's flat! Waitaminit....what are these two objects....*pats lower, Miaka-style* And there's nothing here!
What a funky lady
She like it, like it, like it like that
He was a lady.
Seiya: .....Ew! I kissed a MAN!
Nuriko: Ew! I kissed a WOMAN!
Turn the other cheek dear
Seiya: *slaps Nuriko* How dare you, you queer!
Nuriko: *throws Seiya* Look who's talking!
Seiya: *groans in pain* Owwwww.....
Nuriko: Well, I'm off to burn my clothes and take a long, hot bath. Bye!
Seiya: *rubs head and attempts to adjust her rumpled clothing*
Hotohori person comes backstage.
Hotohori: Hey, are you all right, miss?
Seiya: Wow, you're beautiful.
Hotohori: Thanks. Everyone says that.
And so it begins again...poor Seiya! She sure knows how to pick 'em....