Stephenie Meyer owns all of the characters (I just make them do stupid stuff)
EmPOV
I was sitting on the couch minding my own business watching TV, and then I heard that annoying little stuffy voice "EMMETT!" Alice was sick and decided I was her victim of annoyance today. So I walked up the stairs at human pace and entered her room. She was sitting there with Jasper, and she called me over. "Emmy can I ask yuh a biig *achoo* favuh?"
"What do you want?"
"You to go shopping for me"
"Nooooo way dude, remember the last time I went shopping for you?"
He figured that Alice was remembering the time when he went shopping for her and bought Doritos instead of Cheetos and she pounced on him, made him go back, and buy some Cheetos…..which she doesn't even eat. Apparently Edward heard because he was about to explode with laughter outside of the door.
"Pleeeeassee Emmy???"
"Oh fine, but if I get the wrong thing, you can't pounce I told you I wasn't right for the job." I walked out of the room past an exploding Edward, and walked down the stairs to a very upset Rose.
"What is it?" I said in a very sarcastic voice
"That is it" She said while pointing at Esme's coffee table, well broken coffee table
"What happened?" I asked now concerned
"Those two is what happened" now moving her finger over to where Jasper was lifting Edward up and slamming him onto the floor. Then the man you really want to see at a time like this comes down the stairs, Carlisle.
"What's going on down here?" Nobody wanted to rat them out but Bella couldn't hold it in….hold on where did she come from?
Bella took a deep breath and said "Edward was laughing really hard at Alice's thoughts and then Jasper told him to shut up but he didn't so he tried to send a wave of anger through Edward and it worked but Edward got really mad and threw Jasper into the coffee table and then Jasper picked him up and slammed him into the floor" all in one breath. After her speech she hid her face behind her hair so she wouldn't see our reactions. Carlisle said very calmly "My children, My children I love you all so much, but if you don't get out of here in less than 2 seconds I'm gonna rip you all to pieces and burn you" " 2, 1, ….. Yeah you better run" Carlisle murmured under his breath. I headed out to the car and found a note on the driver's seat listing what I had to go get for Alice. I think it was longer than my body, but I managed.
"This is gonna be a long ride." I thought
Review, Review, Review I know this one isn't that funny but the next one will be hilarious =]