April Request for kisaitaluvr.
I tried my best, I hope you like it.
Characters (c) Kishimoto
Pairing(s) - MadaTobiZet, HidaKuzu, & hinting of SasoDei
It had been roughly a week upon Tobi revealing his true identity to me that I began to ponder things. I, being the human, had a certain soft spot for the knucklehead while my demon half thought him merely a nuisance. Then he told us about Madara and the demon agreed with me. We both loved this ninja- but how much?
Zetsu sat in an Akatsuki hideout, waiting for the other members to return from their money-gathering missions. Ever since Hidan had been introduced, Kakuzu had, scary although true, lessened the budget limits. Zetsu sighed, shuffling from foot to foot, there were a few plants around the room. Being a peaceful enough cannibal with a plant-like appearance, he tended to have a certain place for vegetation. The peaceful atmosphere soon ended at the sound of the door being kicked open.
"Jashin damnit, Kakuzu! I told you, it wasn't my fucking fault that bastard didn't listen!"
"He's not supposed to listen to us, he was our target!"
"Still not my fuckin' fault!"
"I give up! You're sleeping with Deidara tonight."
Zetsu looked up to see the Immortal Duo enter. Hidan was covered in the usual array of wounds while Kakuzu was clean of any signs of a fight.
"Did he cost you another bounty? Undoubtedly."
"Bastard just had to try and convert another one giving him plenty of time to escape which left us to hunt down a new, less expensive bounty." Kakuzu frowned further, "In the end, we got half price because the moron got carried away, completely marring the poor bastard's face."
"Quit calling me a moron! That's the fifth fucking time in the course of two minutes!"
"Well, well, the moron can count after all."
"Sixth, fucking miser." Hidan snarled.
Kakuzu rolled his eyes and sat on the chair farthest from the loveseat Hidan had taken. Zetsu started at the sound of the door being slammed open once more to reveal a familiar scene ever since Sasori "died". Tobi darted into the room, colliding into Zetsu and then scurrying behind him once a ticked Deidara entered behind him, clay explosive in hand.
"Deidara, you blow up another hideout and I'll tan your hide- and not in the way I do to Hidan."
Kakuzu stood, grabbing the figure from his hand and then tossed it to Hidan. Hidan, sadly but not surprisingly, had been distracted. There was a BANG- Deidara had made an impact explosive. Kakuzu "face palmed" before returning to his seat. Deidara laughed nervously as the smoke cleared to reveal a slightly banged up Hidan. Before he could open his mouth to curse, Deidara barreled into him.
"I swear- it wasn't my fault! You saw it! Kakuzu-sama threw it, not me!" Deidara cried.
"That all aside, perhaps we should settle down for the meeting?" Phox now entered with Kisame and Itachi.
The meeting was not very long, only assigning Kakuzu and Hidan to capturing the 2-Tailed Cat Jinchuuriki. Kakuzu and Hidan would rest for the night before heading out late in the afternoon. Kisame and Itachi left for a separate hideout, preferring to be alone. Zetsu was going to head to bed but had a craving for some meat so he too left with Tobi following after once Deidara had told him to "fuck off."
"Hidan, don't forget, you're sleeping with Deidara tonight- I better not find you in our room or so help me, I will ensure you will not be able to walk for a month."
"WHAT!? You were fucking serious about that? WHAT THE FUCK?!"
"Hidan, I need rest and relaxation. Two things of which you ruin for me on a minutely basis. You're fucking annoying and a waste of my valuable time. Time is money, money is love." Kakuzu was gone before anyone could reply.
"… Hidan… just what did you do, hmm?" Deidara asked, dumbstruck alongside Phox.
"I didn't do shit…" Hidan managed in his speechless stupor. "All I did was ask if he had ever been uke…"
"Oh… that explains it. Let's go to my room and we'll talk more."
Deidara led the other two to his room in the base. Upon arrival, Phox plopped down on her bed, Sasori's old one, and Deidara took Hidan to his own.
"Alright, here's the thing…"
Zetsu loped along through the forest, enjoying the serene landscape, unaware of his tail. He stopped suddenly spotting a wanderer up ahead. He grinned an evil looking grin before moving in for the kill.
"I never thought you actually killed your own prey. I always assumed you ate whatever corpse was lying around." Madara appeared from his hiding place, watching the plant successfully take down the straggler without a hitch.
"I'm taking that as an insult… We are not weak, Madara-sama." Zetsu replied, cloaking his surprise well.
"Hmm… I know that very well. If I did indeed believe you weak, would you really be standing before me dressed as such and alive?" Madara retorted coolly, smirking beneath the mask. He continued when Zetsu gave no reply, "No, I actually consider you quite strong. I need you as much as I need Pain, maybe more." He confessed and both sides of Zetsu felt their shared heart increase its beat and a heat course through their body.
"Ah… well… um… I'm gonna go and… uh… See if Phox wants to share… this one has quite a bit of meat on his bones." Zetsu hefted the corpse and successfully evaded Madara.
He headed for Deidara and Phox's room. They only shared because, although Phox was Zetsu's partner and Tobi was Deidara's, Zetsu had insisted it would be safer for Tobi to be far away from the bomber whenever possible. Besides… both Phox and Deidara had lovers and of the same gender. He considered knocking, then just bursting in but paused, he heard Hidan's voice. He hadn't thought the old man would seriously throw out his only lay.
"WHOA, WHOA! YOU MEAN MY KAKUZU'S BEEN A UKE IN A THREEWAY!? And with YOU AND THAT BASTARD?!"
"Hidan- shh! Don't shout, he'll hear us! It's the whole reason he lost that one bet (1)- the bet with Yukori and his master. Basically, when Atari became my teacher, Yuko and his master knew Atari and the fact he loves turning on his seme… a fact Kakuzu had stubbornly ignored. Yuko's master bet him that Atari would turn on him… Kakuzu bet he wouldn't… then Atari said I needed to get a taste of both ways and practice with threesomes… so… he uh… Kakuzu-danna volunteered… He wasn't expecting our attack…"
…~Silence~…
Thump.
"O My Jashin, hahaha! Way to go Dei!"
Phox hit the floor laughing while Hidan stood, staring into nothingness. Zetsu chose this moment to enter. He might be able to safely remove his partner before she was killed. If not… well… he'd never had cat and human mulch before.
"Um, Phox, we wondered if you were hungry." Zetsu's humane side started, hoping the demon would keep qui- "Haha! Kakuzu could never get a decent fuck so he thought he'd try being the fucked of some blonde tranny."
Glare~
"Um… I'll just… melt away quietly, food's in our room, Phox. Leftovers in the usual place."
"THAT'S IT! KAKUZU'S ASS IS MINE, DAMNIT!"
Zetsu made it safely back to his room. Tobi and a corpse greeted him within.
"Zetsu-san! You look so pale! Even your black half looks gray and your flytrap is yellow! Tell Tobi what happened?!" Tobi cried, scurrying over to his sempai.
"I thought I knew everything about everyone in this organization- especially Kakuzu (2)… the world as I know it is over… gone… dead…" He slowly began to shrink inside his trap as it closed shut.
"Don't die, Zetsu-san! Tobi loves you cause Tobi is a good boy!" Tobi stuck his hands between the closing appendages, prying them open to reveal Zetsu with a bloody nose courtesy white side.
Atmosphere began to build, the silence stretched and then…
BAM!
"Zetsu! Quick! I need all the aphrodisiacs ya got!" Phox burst in, panting only to receive a glare from yellow eyes and a black eye flickering to red. "… I don't care if I've interrupted something- Hidan said he'd go a-wol and kill us all- starting with slow torture for Dei, instant for me, and then raping for Kakuzu!"
Zetsu, in order to shoo her away and return to questioning the masked ninja, gave her all his aphrodisiacs. He nearly pushed her out, hands pushing her lower back. He slammed the door shut behind her and turned to face Tobi. He stopped cold.
"That girl is a nuisance. How did she even get into this organization?" The orange mask was off.
Zetsu wasn't sure if he should defend her, but Madara was pissed. He shivered when that red gaze fell on him. It wasn't out of fear, that much was painfully obvious. He glanced down to below his waist.
"I-Itachi recommended her for stealth missions rivaling mine own…"
"It was a rhetorical question." Madara eyed Zetsu with interest, "Tobi really likes you, you know? Because Tobi's a good boy."
"Er… Great, just what I need." Zetsu's black side replied, voice dripping in sarcasm.
"You know, Tobi and I are the same person- If he likes you, I respect that." He hinted and Zetsu grew hot once more with hope.
"We like Tobi too… I am proud to be in your organization. We usually try to avoid war, but we will gladly stay by your side."
Meanwhile~
"Now, just find some way to get this to Kakuzu's mouth. I mixed some lovely plants in with some of Sasori's leftover poison." Phox held a vial out to Hidan while Deidara looked on in silence. "Not only will Kakuzu be horny as fuck, he'll be weakened so he should be an easy fuck."
"Since when did you start using 'fuck' so much, hm?"
"It comes from spending time in Hidan's loving company." Phox drawled with a playful hint.
Both of the boys gave a snort. Hidan smirked before giving a wave and heading for his room. He strode past Zetsu's room which, unfortunately, was located directly next to Hidan and Kakuzu's usual room. Hidan tentatively reached for the handle of the door. He hoped Kakuzu was sleeping- if he interrupted the man's counting ritual now… he shuddered at the thought, easing the door open. He gave a quiet sigh of relief. Kakuzu was in bed.
Hidan tiptoed over to the bed, careful to avoid the mess of clothes on the floor. Kakuzu was lying on his stomach, as usual when sleeping alone… not that Hidan watched him sleep- after all, Kakuzu usually slept after him (3). He was careful to avoid the masks and slipped into bed. Now, how to turn him over without waking him. He leaned over his back, then straddled his hips. He wished he could lay on him and sleep there, but he had a better idea- one that would be more fun. He crawled out of the bed and, with a Cheshire grin, brought his hand down on his partner's ass with a rewarding 'SMACK.'
He pulled back just as Kakuzu snapped awake. Hidan held his ground, appearing confident while holding in a whimper.
"Hidan?! Did you seriously just spank me?! What the fuck!?" He roared. Zetsu and Tobi, listening in the other room gave each other a questioning look of shock.
"You know what the fuck- who the fuck, you the fuck." Hidan played with the word, enjoying the look of utter loathing on his lover's face.
"I told you to sleep with Deidara. The day anyone tops me is the day I die- you got that?" Kakuzu growled, looming over the smaller man.
"No! I don't fucking get it!" Hidan was beginning to lose his rare temper and patience, "If that's true- then go die in a fucking ditch! Don't try to lie and say you've never been fucking fucked!"
Kakuzu fell silent but held his glare. Until Hidan's expression grew distressed.
"I-I don't understand… I love you so much regardless of all the shit you give and put me through… Don't you love me?"
Three of Kakuzu's hearts stopped beating while the other two's beat increased. He opened his mouth as if to reply, closed it, and then approached his uke. He bent down to become face-to-face and opened his mouth again. Hidan was looking down, holding his hand oddly to his mouth. Before Kakuzu could give an answer, Hidan recovered from his false distress and crashed their lips together. Kakuzu was caught off-guard and his eyes widened when a liquid other than saliva or blood transferred from Hidan's mouth to his own gaped mouth.
He tried to break away but was shoved to the ground- it was hard for Kakuzu to forget the other man's muscled build. Hidan hardly ever seemed athletic, the way he complained and what-not. Kakuzu, at some point, started listing off how Hidan would refuse to do any form of work unless- no, even with his deity involved he was lazy. The bed lurched, banging into the wall at Hidan's pounce. Zetsu and Tobi were startled and after a brief moment of thought, Zetsu's demonic self started to laugh.
Kakuzu's former thoughts began tuning to turn him on.
"W-what the hell wazzat?" Kakuzu slurred, becoming weaker.
"A special drug whipped up by-"
"Please don'say 'Phox'…"
Hidan grinned wickedly and Kakuzu's groan turned to a moan with a brush to his groin. He felt far more sensitive being unable to fully move. The other drugs sure didn't help much either as Hidan reached down to pull up his seme's shirt and then fondling the stitching. Hidan became impatient, unsure of how long the drugs would work on a man with five hearts.
"Hm, you're always so fucking rough with me and fucking careless- so I'm thinking I should tear your ass up." Hidan breathed in the man's ear, reaching to pull off his former seme's pants.
He scowled when Kakuzu's hand blocked his own. 'Stupid cock block…' Hidan sat back up and got off the bed. Kakuzu barely had time to finish his sigh of relief before he was wrenched off the bed. He was stunned for a moment before realizing he had been pulled into the lap of his smaller companion. His stomach being jabbed by the boney yet strong knees. He tensed just as punishment came. After the second spank of the night Kakuzu began to squirm earning a third and another until he stopped squirming and growling only to moan out.
"I thought you were more sadist than masochist, Kuzu-chan. I've always been a sadomasochist though. It is practically a requirement of my religion, after all." Hidan mocked, bringing his hand down again.
Kakuzu flinched but jumped when that gentle hand slipped under the band of his pants. He gulped as it pulled everything off in order to reach their target which was now nearly fully erect. He still couldn't move much even as Hidan hefted him back onto the bed, still on his stomach. This is the point Kakuzu decided to give in, he wanted this… sad, but true. His breath picked up as his cheeks were spread and played with right before he felt something forcing it's way in.
He groaned out, gritting his teeth, eyes watering slightly but not anywhere near crying. He looked over his shoulder to glare at his temporary seme. The bastard was smirking, yet clearly looked to be enjoying it. He was panting as much as Kakuzu.
"Guh, w-why are you so fucking tight? Was that blonde bitch lying?"
"Mn-ah, it was j-just so long ah-go." Hidan had finally made it fully inside his lover.
They stayed that way for a little longer before Kakuzu relaxed and Hidan caught his breath. The latter withdrew slowly while his other moaned out. He had almost pulled out entirely save the slightly bloodied tip before thrusting back in after counting to three. The resulting cries were heard through the wall separating their room from Zetsu and Tobi's room. Oblivious to this knowledge, Hidan continued to thrust, testing different angles until…
"There, HIDAN!" Kakuzu gasped at having his gland rammed.
"Eh, what's that Kuzu-chan? I couldn't hear you."
Phox and Deidara, with their room at the far opposite side of the near empty base were kept awake by the cries following.
"I SAID FUCKING HARDER, HIDAN!"
"FUCKING MAKE ME, UKE!"
"MAYBE I WI-AH! Mn!"
Kakuzu was lucky Hidan was close. The grey-haired increased the pace and broke rhythm. The bed scraped the floor and collided with the wall. On the other side of said wall, Madara had retreated and Tobi hid his face in Zetsu's torso on the bed, trying to block out the strange yet familiar sounds so he could sleep without nightmares… A dream if his plant-man appeared in them and they were the ones making the animalistic sounds of passion.
"A-almost, ahh." Hidan panted, climaxing deep within a now surprised and unsuspecting Kakuzu.
Hidan remained inside for moments longer before letting go of the miser's member and then stroking it. Kakuzu twitched, shuddered once, then released as well. He hadn't been this tired in ages… (and he's ancient.)
"T-thanks, Kuzu… I love you." Hidan yawned hugely, resting his head on the miser's back.
"I suppose you want me to say, 'I love you' too?" Kakuzu scoffed.
Upon not receiving an answer, the man strained to see the other one's face. 'Asleep?' Kakuzu's eye twitched yet he sighed and wormed his way out from under him. He gently pulled Hidan to the bathroom, he was ¼ awake now. They cleaned off before Kakuzu returned them to the bed. He lay down first and Hidan soon followed. The old man made a move to hold the Jashinist, but said Jashinist beat him to it and had fallen into a deep slumber buried in his lover's back, right in the middle of the four masks and over the main one- the one that would always beat for him and him alone.
~AFTER THE TWO-TAIL'S CAPTURE~
Zetsu and Tobi's bond had grown ever stronger after Kakuzu's night of being seme'd. Zetsu couldn't help but feel jealous, watching Tobi leave with the blonde for the three-tail. He began to notice a slight change in the immortal duo. They acted as if something had or was going to happen, they no longer had as many wild night but instead cuddled. It was a terrifying sight for any of the unfortunate members that happened to spy them in their hiding places. He had to rescue Tobi from disturbing them thrice.
He stood from where he sat on a rock before melting to the floor. He reappeared by Kakuzu and Hidan just as the zealot was finishing his long-ass ceremony. Phox was usually the one to handle them, but she hadn't been around much since the Zombies' private behavior change. He collected the Jinchuuriki then left having only exchanged brief conversation.
~DURING ZOMBIE TEAM vs KONOHA~
Zetsu rested in the temporary, cavernous hideout, letting his food digest. The corpses of the Jinchuuriki had been quite tasty and he relished the taste and silent time alone.
"ZETSU-SAN~!"
While it lasted…
"Tobi. What?"
"Tobi wanted to see Zetsu because Tobi is a good boyfriend."
Zetsu froze, the white side turning red. The black side, meanwhile, was wondering if Madara thought the same as his other annoying self.
"Since when did you and whitey start dating?" He grumbled, he'd been in a bad mood since his last confrontation with Madara.
"Yep, right after Hidan fucked Kakuzu."
Zetsu started at Madara's sudden comment and they looked at the ninja, eyes wide. They wanted to ask more but Madara looked up to the sky.
"Kakuzu and Hidan should have returned awhile ago…" He said suddenly.
"You're right. But those two are always delaying thanks to Kakuzu's greed and Hidan's complaints."
"Still, best to check on them… We've lost Sasori already."
"But they're the Immortal Duo! Sasori claimed to be near immortal as well. That and Kakuzu is just hard to kill. Hidan can be incapacitated if Kakuzu were to die." Zetsu argued, already sinking into the ground.
"Where's Zetsu-san going? Tobi wants to come too!"
Zetsu exhaled slowly, agitated, yet let he stopped and grabbed Tobi. It was always so difficult to bring a passenger. After such a confession from the ninja, however, they agreed he was worth the added effort.
They arrived just outside of Nara Forest only to be greeted by a familiar cat. Zetsu let go of Tobi who rushed after the feline. The red cat bristled and shot a warning swipe.
"Come back here Tobi. Well, Phox?"
She said nothing at first, bowing her head, she replied, "Kakuzu and Hidan where killed by the Kyuubi's village-mates."
"That's not funny, Phoxi." Tobi cried, "They're the Immortal Zombie Duo!"
"Yes, well, they're not so immortal now." Zetsu restrained a dark laugh.
"They will be of no further use to the Akatsuki- Kakuzu's hearts have been destroyed and his body ravaged. Don't even get me started on what they did to Hidan." Phox scoffed, indifferent.
"Tobi, why don't you go tell Pain? We'll catch up." Zetsu suggested gently, hoping Madara would allow it.
"Tobi will go report in because Tobi is a good boy!" Tobi chirped, running in the direction of the nearest base. He would transport once far enough away from Phox.
"Zetsu, I need you to send a message to Deidara. Tell him that he won't have to observe Madara anymore and that it's time to prepare Sasuke."
"I still hate the idea of going behind Madara's back."
"I understand- I am grateful you agreed to assist me in the end though. It looks as though you've made progress."
"… I still don't think he'll go with us willingly though…" Zetsu looked to the floor.
"He doesn't have to- everyone's free to go wherever they please once the ordeal has ended."
"What of Orochimaru?"
"Orochimaru is fulfilling his duty back at the village while Kabuto, I'm afraid, has gone missing, unaware of the plans. And about the Tobi/Madara issue… might I recommend a night alone in a clearing before the meeting?"
Zetsu had left Phox to collect Kakuzu and Hidan, following the trail Tobi had taken. He liked strolls through the woods over shifting from place to place. Good exercise and chance for a good meal. A rustle was heard in bushes off to his right and he turned, hopeful. The rustling stopped but he smelled a corpse just beyond. So he, finding himself suddenly hungry, trudged through the undergrowth towards the tantalizing source.
It led him to a cave- one not used by the Akatsuki or other evil-doers. There, in the middle of the floor lay the corpse. Zetsu grinned, 'Best not to let it go to waste.' He practically purred, reaching to feast. A rumbling sounded back by the entrance he had turned his back to and then a slam brought total dark. Zetsu tensed, on high alert he expected an ambush.
"Relax, Zetsu-san, Tobi's here- as am I." Madara appeared, a light in hand.
"Why did you lock us in, Madara-sama?"
"No need to be so formal as we are alone." Was the man's only reply as he crept up to Zetsu.
"I get the feeling you're implying something?" Zetsu was quivering with hopeful anticipation.
He gave a nod and indicated to a form of bed against the wall behind him. The corpse had distracted earlier notice of the cannibal whom was now being led to said bed. He sat on it with Madara hovering in front of him. He slipped off the mask with ease and Zetsu inhaled slowly, the sight breathtaking for them.
"Zetsu, before we begin, I have to know- why did you send Tobi away and talk with that woman alone? What are you hiding?" Zetsu's heart stuttered.
"Nothing, Madara. She just is uncomfortable around you and I wanted to know more of their deaths. Not every day you hear of an immortal dying." The white side lied smoothly. The black half remained rightfully silent.
The other looked suspecting, but dropped the matter. He placed a gloved hand on each side of the Grass nin's face, bringing their faces closer til their lips met- their third kiss…
~FLASHBACK~
"FUCKING MAKE ME, UKE!"
"MAYBE I WI-AH! Mn!"
Madara turned pale beneath his mask while Zetsu didn't know whether to laugh or gag. They were inwardly debating with one another when someone slammed into them. Zetsu's demonic half scoffed before relinquishing control to the other half, 'Have fun with the spazz.' were his parting words. Zetsu sighed, looking down to confirm it was indeed Tobi.
"What's wrong, Tobi?"
"Something's wrong! Hidan-kun sounds like Kakuzu-san and Kakuzu-san like Hidan-kun." He cried into Zetsu's cloak.
"It's okay, Tobi, they just switched roles tonight. Nothing to worry about." He cooed, gently leading Tobi over to his bed.
"What roles?"
"… Er…"
Tobi blinked up at Zetsu's flushing face. His mask was still off and before he knew it, he leant over to place a chaste kiss on the scarred lips. When Zetsu's sense caught up with his hormones, he snapped back, hand covering his mouth. Tobi sat in his lap, frozen with mild curiosity and… lust? He wondered if that was the word as he brought his mouth back up to Zetsu's after mechanically pulling the hand away. This one lasted a bit longer, Zetsu's tongue explored the other boy's mouth just before they pulled apart. Silence stretched save the horrid sounds next door.
In a flash, Tobi recalled the zombie duo, the horrific sounds. Then the kiss he exchanged with his roommate. The questions overwhelmed him and he buried his face back into Zetsu's abdomen. He tried his best to shut out the moaning and clashing next door. A while later sleep overcame him and he dreamed happily with Zetsu in the field of flowers.
~END FLASHBACK~
"Oi, oi, oi, Phox, why the fuck is everyone calling you Phox-sama?!" A familiar magenta-eyed male, covered in fresh stitches scowled, following Phox through a bustling hidden village.
"Because Phox-sama is the leader of this village, moron." A tan and heavily cloaked individual grumbled, walking besides the other male in case he started to fall apart again.
"Oh, not you too, fuckin' miser!"
"Would you two please shut the fuck up- I do have Konoha and Suna Shinobi hanging around. I would appreciate if you could hold your fighting until after they all leave. " Phox snarled softly.
They continued down the street until they reached a building at the heart of the village. They entered, heading for the stairs on the right leading to the basement. A redhead sat amongst a group of grotesque puppets, his muddy brown eyes raising to greet the newcomers.
"How much longer, Phox?" He asked.
"Zetsu will report in shortly." She replied coolly.
"Ah, of course I will." Said green man appeared from the shadows.
"Well?" the redhead snapped, impatient as usual.
"Deidara will be leaving to pursue Sasuke with Tobi as we speak."
"Well, whatever plan you've made is going to backfire with that little shit involved." the gray-hair scoffed.
The green man shot him a deadly glare. The other returned it at first but wavered when Zetsu spoke.
"Madara is not a little shit, slut. Tobi is a good boy."
"That's enough. Zetsu, let's go. Marionette, fill Rag Doll and his bitch in on the rules."
"You honestly couldn't think of a name for him?" the redhead drawled, "But I will fill them in, Phox-sama."
Phox gave a curt nod before shifting to her feline form, landing lightly on the plant-man's shoulder. They sunk through the floor with ease, leaving the three opossum criminals behind.
"It is safe to assume you and Tobi-er-Madara have grown close?" Phox meowed once they had finished the transport.
"… We got as far as Sasori and Deidara… Kakuzu & Hidan are far farther along…" Zetsu gave a shudder of the memories of the Zombie Duo's rough nights.
"Hm… I am glad to hear that… Soon I will be joining them all…"
"And I?"
"Will remain with your heart." Phox answered simply, padding ahead upon hearing the explosion marking the end.
Bwaha... sorry there was no MadaZet smut & what-not... I'm still hoping to learn more of these characters before I can get as comfortable with them as the others...
(1) See Lasting Partners
(2) Zetsu hates Kakuzu for reasons I have yet to make.
(3) Hidan pretends to sleep just to catch a glimpse of his violent seme sleeping innocently... he still usually falls asleep first though.
Also: Again, I'm sorry if this is confusing- I ramble too much and must work on my oneshots... xD