Hermione Granger was standing at the top of the astronomy tower, waiting, watching. Knowing that he would come to her. She stood there, quite near the edge, looking over the grounds of Hogwarts, still in a state of mild disrepair after the final battle last year. Returning for a seventh year seemed like such a poor idea now, with all the sad memories etched into the building. She sighed.
"Why so sad Granger?" asked a boy with a familiar smirk on his face. "Did you think I wouldn't come?"
Hermione quickly turned around. "I was more worried that you'd been caught by Filch."
"Aw come on, do you really think I'd let that Squib catch me?" He asked, raising an eyebrow and moving closer to Hermione.
"No, no of course not," Hermione said blushing. "I just… I worry about you."
The boy closed the distance between them in an embrace. "Don't," he whispered, before his lips met hers.
And then suddenly the kiss deepened, his hands in her bushy hair, her arms around his thin but muscular frame.
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Waking up suddenly, Hermione Granger desperately tried to remember where she was. She calmed as she made out the familiar walls of the girl's dormitory in Gryffindor tower. This calm didn't last long before she remembered her dream. Again? She asked herself, for the boy had been recurring in her dreams frequently these past weeks.
She sat up in bed and took a sip of water from the cup by her bed – an old muggle habit she had never really broken. Closing her eyes she focussed on her dream, hopelessly trying to determine who the boy was. He seemed so familiar, with features she swore she would recognize if she ever saw them outside of her dream life. That same old smirk every time, that voice, dark, but incredibly sexy and that unmistakable smell that she couldn't quite place.
Realizing that there was no point in continuing to prod her mind into revealing itself any further, Hermione lay back down, trying to slow her still-racing heart beat. Deep breaths in and out, in and out, in and out. In and… out. Soon she was sleeping again, half dreading the dream for fear of the unknown, and half lusting for it so she could finally know who the boy was.
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Later that day, in Potions class, Hermione found herself musing about the past year. So much had happened. They had defeated Voldemort, but at great cost. While she had chosen to return to Hogwarts with Ginny, to obtain her N.E.W.T.S., Harry and Ron had taken up the Ministry on their Auror offer, never even entertaining the idea of returning to their school. Hogwarts was different now though. Its building was still scarred, and would be forever, with dark curses that refused to be fixed, with memories of the dead, and with that lingering feeling of terror and loss.
Hermione liked to think that things would've been different if Dumbledore had still been alive. If he had been able to help Harry in the final battle. She stubbornly believed that if he had of been there, the school would not carry its sad story on with it for eternity. Ron thought this was a stupid idea, and that the school wasn't really any different than it had been for all of their years at Hogwarts.
It was this sentiment that made Hermione break up with him. She just couldn't understand how Ron could so easily forget the events that had occurred. For Hermione, remembering was a daily ritual. She would walk past where Tonks and Lupin had lay and have to suppress a sob. The Potions room often reminded her of Severus Snape, his dedication to the cause, and how none of them had ever truly understood him.
Everywhere she went in the school reminded her of something, of someone. It was painful, true, but she felt as if coming back was something she had to do. Early in the year McGonagall, now headmistress, had pulled her aside and told her that she could take the N.E.W.T.S. from home if being in Hogwarts was too much for her. Hermione told her a firm "no", that she was fine, and that she would continue at Hogwarts until the end of her seventh year.
"Miss Granger?"
Hermione started at Slughorn's words. "Sorry Professor, what did you say?"
"I was just going to ask you how your potion was coming along, but, as usual I see that it's coming along swimmingly." Slughorn said with a smile.
"Oh… Thank you Professor." Hermione said before turning back and focussing solely on brewing the perfect Potion, putting all thoughts of other things to the back of her mind.
She was just adding powdered root of asphodel, the last ingredient, when she felt someone's eyes on her. Looking up she spotted Malfoy at the seat across from her, turning away quickly.
"Can I help you with something Malfoy?" She asked, curious.
"Whatever would make you think that I would need your help Granger?" he snarked back at her. The remark, though cutting, lacked what Hermione liked to think of as "the old Malfoy charm". Nothing he said anymore had any real conviction. His words may have been meant as rude and snarky, but they lacked any true bite.
Feeling curious, and all too brave, Hermione asked, "Are you alright Malfoy?"
He turned slowly to face her. "My father's in Azkaban, my mother's heartbroken… and I just can't bloody focus in this school anymore. Do you think I'm okay?"
A stunned look graced Hermione's face. From her recollections this was possibly the longest sentence that Malfoy had ever said to her that didn't contain a stinging insult about Gryffindors or her blood status. She also realized that, for once, they both felt the same way.
"I know what you mean… about this place." Hermione whispered, noticing that Slughorn was looking their way.
"How could you possibly understand? You may mourn the losses, but you have no idea how it feels to have been a part of the very thing that caused them." Malfoy whispered back before Slughorn reached them.
"Is there, uh, a problem, Miss Granger? Mister Malfoy?" he asked looking quizzically back and forth between the pair he thought least likely to get in trouble for excessive talking in class.
"No." they answered in unison. Blushing, Hermione turned away and went back to brewing her potion.
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Sitting in the cold, damp recesses of the Slytherin common room, Draco recalled the day's events. Remembering what he had told Granger, he couldn't help but wonder why he had allowed himself to reveal so much. It was odd, but within those brief moments, it had been like a weight had been removed from his chest. Almost like he could breathe again without the usual pain of guilt.
Shaking his head vigorously, he decided that saying those things had been a fluke. Just a lapse in judgement and reason. And feeling like he could breathe again? He must've inhaled too much of the fumes that had spewed from his potion when he added the wrong amount of asphodel.
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Hermione trudged into the Gryffindor common room weary, with little energy left. She had just spent her evening in the library, as usual, completing all of her required homework precisely on time, and with precisely the required amount of writing.
Bumping into Ginny on her way up the stairs, she waved a quick hello before continuing her way up the staircase. She hadn't bet on Ginny following.
"Hermione, can we talk?"
Surprised, Hermione looked up, "Oh, sure Gin, what's on your mind?"
"Well, I was just wondering if, uh, you're alright?" The similarity of the question pulled her back into Potions class, and Malfoy's inexplicable confession.
"Yeah Ginny… I'm fine, why d'you ask?" Hermione countered, as she shimmied out of her robes and into her flannel pajamas.
"Well, it's just, you seem different here, at Hogwarts." Ginny reflected. "Right after the war, before we came back here, you were your usual cheerful self. Now you seem sad all the time."
"Sad? Me?" Hermione began to lie as she turned down her bed.
"Don't deny it Hermione. I know it's hard for you to be here. It's hard for me to be here too. I mean, I take the long way to Charms class everyday just to avoid…" Ginny trailed off. "But you, you seem worse. Almost like you're losing your will to live."
"I'm fine Ginny. Just a little sad that's all... Don't worry, I'm not going to go throw myself off the Astronomy tower or something. It'll all be fine. I promise."
"Well… okay. If you say so. 'Night Hermione." Ginny said hesitantly before leaving the dormitory.
"'Night" Hermione mumbled as she lay down. One solitary tear dripped from her eyes before they closed and she relaxed into sleep.