A Sister's Point of View.
By Amethyst Whisper
Author Notes:
This story was written for a challenge that was to write a story from the point of view of an "extra" who's life is directly or indirectly impacted by one of our heroes.
Story Warning: ADULT This story contains a scene where sexual abuse happens "off page". If this is not to your liking, please do not read.
Iolaus is funny, handsome, and he has the most twisted sense of humor. He's a master storyteller, has more lives than a cat and he's an enthusiast of vulgar tavern songs. Although he loves to sing he carries a tune about as well as he can cook. Trust me, I should know. I've known him all my life. I've watched him love. I've held him in grief. I was at his wedding and I was at the funerals of his wife and children. Iolaus is my hero. He has been for as long as I can remember. He's my inspiration. He's saved me more times than I can count physically, emotionally and spiritually. My name will never be in any history book. But my life is forever entwined with the Golden Hunter. I am Alara of Thebes; sister of Iolaus.
As a child I was his shadow. You'd think that he would have hated me. I was following him on my little 4-year-old legs, snapping branches and rustling leaves. He just smiled at me. It was my first hunting trip. Mother wanted me out of the house. I was a rambunctious child with a vivid imagination. That day I was pretending I was one of Artemis' hounds on the heels of my prey. I was actually running around our small house dodging furniture and running circles around my mother. I managed to knock the leg off of the supper table causing it to topple to the ground. Unfortunately, Father's crossbow was on the table and it broke when it crashed to the floor. Mother was furious. I was terrified. We had received word that Father was returning from battle. He would be arriving that evening. I couldn't move. My legs were frozen in place as my mother yelled at me. Tears were pouring down my cheeks and my breathing was hitched with my sobs. The back door flew open and Iolaus ran in. He took a look at the mess I caused and started speaking to our mother. I don't know what was said. All I could think about was Father coming home and he would be angry with me. The next thing I knew was being swept up in Iolaus' arms and carried out the back door.
"I'm s-sorry Iolaus. I didn't m-mean to." I croaked out between sobs.
"Shh now. It wasn't your fault. It was an accident," he soothed. "Let's get out of the house for a little while and let Mother calm down. I thought we could go hunting. What do you say?"
My jaw dropped and my tears came to a halt. "You want to take me hunting?" I asked in disbelief. Iolaus was an incredible hunter for one so young. If it weren't for him, our family would have starved on more than one occasion. Father was away a lot and Mother wasn't the best in the garden. The skills of my brother helped us through many a long winter.
"Sure I do," he answered with a grin. "It's about time you learned to track. I can also show you where the best rabbit holes are."
So there we were, prowling through the woods in search for rabbits. I listened to everything he told me with rapt attention. He showed me what tracks were made by what animal, he told stories and laughed a lot. I was having a wonderful time basking in his company. I didn't want the day to end. But then I realized that it had to end. We would have to go home and Father would be there. Iolaus was a few paces ahead of me when he realized I had stopped following him. As he turned to look at me his smile faded when he saw the tears gathering in my eyes.
"Al, what's wrong?" he asked as he closed the gap between us.
"I broke Father's crossbow. What's he gonna do when he finds out?"
Iolaus slug his arm around my shoulder pulling me towards him. "It was an accident. He'll understand," he assured me.
"I know how angry he can get." The words came out of my mouth as a whisper. If he weren't so close to me he probably wouldn't have heard it. From the dark look that came over his face I could see he had. The walls were thin in our house. I knew our father had a temper and he usually took out his anger on Iolaus. When I was younger and noticed a black eye or broken wrist, Iolaus just smiled at me and told me a story about defending our home from a terrible warlord or a hydra. I knew he was just trying to protect me. But at 4 years old I knew the reality of our lives. In those circumstances you had to grow up quick to survive. I could see the hurt playing on his features as he realized this. He took a deep breath and tried to console me.
"Don't worry Al. I'll talk to Father tonight about what happened. I'll make sure he knows it was an accident. Will that make you feel better?"
I nodded and fell into his embrace. As he held me I said a silent prayer to whatever God protected small children to watch over our house that night.
We were on our best behavior at dinner. We always were when Father was home. Father pushed his plate away and grabbed the wine jar, pouring himself another mug full.
"So who wants to tell me what happened to my crossbow?" He gestured to the corner of the room where the broken article sat.
The fork holding my food froze in place before my mouth. My mother looked nervously at her lap. Iolaus calmly wiped his mouth with his napkin and addressed our father.
"I would be happy to tell you what happened Father. Could we step outside?"
Mother gasped at his words but was quickly silenced by a glare from the general.
"Why can't you tell me in here boy?"
"I think it would be better if we talked outside," Iolaus stated as he stood from the table. Father looked fiercely at Iolaus but finally stood up and followed him outside. As soon as the door closed Mother started clearing the table. She took my unfinished meal from the table and sent me off to bed. I remember lying awake all night. What if he didn't understand it was an accident. What if he didn't listed to Iolaus? I never dreamed that Iolaus would take the blame himself. I imagine father beat him terribly. He was gone the next morning and he didn't come home again.
Over the next couple of years I would see Iolaus in the village or on my way to the schoolhouse. He would walk with me and tell me of his adventures. I loved every minute I spent with him. I missed him at home although I understood why he left. He would ask me about father and if he treated me well. I never told him that sometimes father would hit me if I did something wrong or if he had too much to drink. I was grateful that the bruises were never visible outside of my clothes. Iolaus would never forgive himself if he knew.
I remember one time I was at the market with my mother. She was moving from stall to stall looking at the wares for sale while chatting with the other women. She never paid much attention to me. I was keeping myself entertained chasing a butterfly when I found myself at the edge of the market square. I heard some laughing down an alleyway so I wandered down to investigate. Empty crates were piled up along the dank walls of the alley causing it to narrow the further I went down. I reached a dead end when suddenly 4 boys emerged from the shadows surrounding me. Their clothes were torn and tattered and their faces were dirty. I felt very uncomfortable but put on a brave face. One of them approached me and poked me with a grimy finger.
"Look what we have here fellas. A little girl got away from her momma."
"What do you want?" I asked defiantly.
"What do you got worth taking?" a voice from behind me asked. I turned around and faced the boy who had spoken. He was fat and dirty with a couple of broken teeth. He looked to be about 11 or 12 years old. As my attention was diverted I felt hands grab around my waist and my rabbit fur carry sack was torn from my grip.
"Hey! Give that back!" I yelled.
"Nice looking sack. I think I'll keep it." One of the boys said smugly.
"You can't have it. My brother made it for me. Give it back!" That carry sack was my most prized possession. Iolaus made it for me for my 6th birthday. I never went anywhere without it. I dove for the boy trying to retrieve what was mine. The boy laughed at me and held the sack over his head. As I tried to reach for it he threw it effortlessly over my head to one of his friends.
"If you don't give it back I'll tell my brother!" I threatened.
"Ooo we're really scared," the ringleader laughed. "Who's your big bad brother?"
"His name is Iolaus and he'll get you for this!" I stated proudly.
The boys stopped throwing my sack and stared at me. After a minute they all burst out laughing.
"That little pipsqueak is your brother?" the fat one asked. "He's nothing but a 2 bit thief."
"Yeah," one of the others chimed in, "He couldn't beat up a 4 year old."
Listening to them insult my brother made me see red. My little fists balled up and I was shaking with rage. "You take that back right now!" I demanded.
They just laughed at me and I lost control. With the fiercest warrior cry I could muster with my 6 year old lungs I lunged at the ringleader and knocked him to his feet. He landed on the ground with an audible groan. My pride didn't last long as I was grabbed from behind and held strong. I was kicking my legs and shouting for them to let me go. The ringleader finally stood up and grabbed my by the shoulders.
"You're more trouble than you're worth. I'm gonna teach you a lesson right now!"
My world quaked in front of my as the boy started shaking me. The blood was rushing past my ears when I thought I heard a yell. The next thing I knew I was slammed to the ground. I tried to get on my hands and knees but the world was spinning in front of me. I felt someone take my shoulders steadying me. I tried to fight them off when I heard a gentle voice.
"It's ok. I'm not going to hurt you. Try to stay still."
I didn't have the strength to argue so I looked up to where the yelling was coming from. There I saw a blond whirlwind beating the stuffing out of the 4 boys who had harassed me. Iolaus had come to my rescue again.
The last boy had made his way to his feet and was running away as fast as his legs could carry him. "You'll get more of the same of you even look at my sister again!" Iolaus shouted after him. He smiled and giggled as he saw the boy pick up speed. His smile disappeared as he came to my side.
"Al, are you ok? Did they hurt you?"
"I'm fine Iolaus. They don't scare me." He chuckled at my bravery. "Here, I think you lost this," he said handing me my sack. "I see you've met my friend," he gestured behind me. I then realized I was resting against something solid and heavy. I shifted to look over my shoulder and met up with 2 beautiful eyes the color of the sea.
"Alara, I'd like you to meet Hercules."
"It's nice to meet you Alara," Hercules said. He stood up and held his hand out to me. I took hold of it and tried to stand but still feeling dizzy my legs had trouble holding me. Hercules took my arm and steadied me. "It's all right. I have you." Looking up into that tan face and brilliant smile I think I fell in love. I guess it was written all over my face because the next thing I heard was Iolaus chuckling behind me. My face flared red as I looked down in embarrassment. Iolaus noticed and feeling guilty hurriedly changed the subject.
"What are you doing down this alley all by yourself?" he questioned me.
"I was in the market with Mother. I got bored and wandered off."
Iolaus came to me and took my small hands in his. "Al, you know better then that. What if I wasn't here to protect you?"
Another blush came to my face as I was reprimanded. Iolaus sighed and tilted my face up to meet his. "Al, I will always do my best to be here for you, to protect you. I'm just upset thinking about what may have happened if I wasn't here. Do you understand?"
"I understand," I nodded. I was then rewarded with a brilliant smile.
"What do you say we go find Mother? She's probably worried sick about you," he said as he led me out of the alleyway.
"Aw Iolaus, she doesn't even know I'm gone. You know she doesn't pay much attention to me."
Iolaus paused and pondered what I told him. I know it hurt him to know we weren't as loved as some of the other children in the village. Hercules clearing his throat diverted our attention.
"Well Alara, Iolaus and I were headed to my mother's house for dinner. Would you like to join us?"
"Really? Oh, Hercules I would love to!" I beamed. "Let's go!"
"Hey now," Iolaus laughed as I dragged him up the alley, "You can come, but we need to let Mother know first."
Alcmene was nicest person I have ever met. I had no idea people could be so kind. I remember that day helping her prepare dinner. We had lemonade under the shade of a giant tree, talking, laughing and watching Hercules and Iolaus mock fighting. I was spellbound as I observed them. Watching them dodge and parry with sticks as swords I saw a bond beginning to form. Iolaus moved like a flash never staying still for an instant. Hercules moved more calculatingly showing a glimpse of the grace and assuredness that was to come in time.
Years pass quickly when you are young and lessons are often hard won. I realized that my perfect brother was fallible when he was arrested for stealing in the village market. My mother wept and my father disowned him. Thankfully Alcmene stood up for him and managed to get him enrolled in Chierons Academy. Iolaus wasn't the best student, but he worked hard. He still managed to hunt for Mother and I when Father was away at war. He never let us do without. I was so proud of him. He still protected me when I was in the market square. At 12 years old boys were noticing me although I only had eyes for Hercules. Iolaus made it certain that all the boys at the Academy knew I was off limits as his little sister. Those who wanted to test that were met with a faster than lightning right hook. It was the winter I was 14 that I realized that Iolaus couldn't always protect me.
It was a cold evening. I was in the barn finishing up tending to the animals when I heard a noise behind me. I turned to see my father standing in the doorway.
"I'm almost finished here, then I'll bring more firewood inside."
Skouros scoffed at me. "You know you wouldn't have to do so much if your runt of a brother didn't disgrace this family."
"I wish you wouldn't call him that," I said before I could stop myself. I knew there was no talking to my father about Iolaus. It only angered him.
"Still defending him huh?" he asked smugly. "I heard he's graduating from the Academy. I'm surprised he managed to pass. Lucky for him that half-breeds mother worked out that deal to keep him out of jail. Won't do him any good. That boy's hopeless and will never be a warrior."
I held my tongue and concentrated on my work. No matter what my father said I was proud of my brother. He had worked hard and was graduating with honors. After a few minutes I noticed Skouros had stopped talking. I glanced up at him and saw him staring at me. I suddenly felt very uncomfortable.
"How old are you now girl?" he barked at me.
"I was 14 this past summer sir."
"14 huh? You know you aren't much younger than your mother was when I married her. She was quite a looker back then." His voice had grown melancholy and his eyes were lost in thought although they were still aimed in my direction. I watched as he walked towards me. As he got closer I smelled it; honey mead.
"You look a lot like she did back then you know," he continued. "Now she's aged, the spark in her eyes has died. She doesn't welcome me to our bed anymore."
I was shocked he was telling me this. I looked up at him again and caught a glint in his eyes. I was suddenly very frightened.
"I have to get my chores done," I mumbled. I turned and walked deeper into the barn. My father followed me lost in his words. He continued as if I hadn't said anything.
"I know I have spent a lot of time away from her. It's turned her bitter and cold. I'm a General for Ares sake! I'm responsible for dozens of men. I've seen more battle than any man in this village! The least I can expect when I get home is a wife who welcomes her husbands advances!"
I continued to back away from him as his voice grew louder. Suddenly my back hit the rear wall of the barn. There was nowhere else to go. I watched as my father came within inches of me blocking any path in which I could run. I recognized the look in his eyes now. He was craving power. I had seen it the many times he beat on Iolaus and the few times he raised his hands to me. There was something else in his stare, something sinister.
"She used to look at me the way you are now. I saw the fear in her eyes, could smell it on her body. Now there's nothing, only resignation." He lifted his hand and caressed my cheek. It wasn't a fatherly gesture. I turned my face away from him but he grabbed me by the chin and forced me to look at him. He seemed to be feeding on my fear. It was exciting him! He ran his fingers down my neck and across the neckline of my blouse. His eyes raked over my body.
"Please Daddy let me go," I pleaded as tears were spilling down my cheeks. I could not control my fear no matter how hard I tried. I never called my father Daddy, but in a desperate attempt to snap him out of his actions I said it. My heart grew cold as I saw this only fed his frenzy. He grabbed my breasts roughly and sniffed my hair. I felt the stubble from his beard scratching my cheek and neck. I couldn't believe this was happening. I realized that I was on my own. No one was coming to help me. In one last frantic effort to stop him from what he was about to do, I sobbed, "Daddy no!"
Skouros curled his lip in disdain and snarled, "Scream all you want girl, no ones coming to help you."
With that he pushed me into a stall and forced me to the ground. He left me lying there sometime later curled in a ball. After I was sure he was gone I pulled on my torn clothes and ran out of the barn. There was only one place I could think of going. One place where I knew I would be safe. I ran all the way to Alcmene's. She had always been so loving and made me feel welcome. I knew I could not stay at home that night. When Alcmene opened the door she gasped at the sight in front of her. I imagine I looked like a mess. I was out of breath, covered in dirt and straw. She took in my clothes and saw they were torn and stained. She didn't have to ask what happened. It was written all over my face.
"Come in child. Let's get you cleaned up." Alcmene said comfortingly.
She led me inside and sat me down by the fire. It was warm and peaceful there. The scent of honey cakes cooling on the windowsill wafted towards me. I shuddered as it made me recall the smell of my father's breath.
"Alara who did this to you? Was it bandits?" Alcmene asked snapping me out of my memories. I couldn't bring myself to speak yet so I slowly shook my head.
"Were you home?" she gently inquired. Her question and her tender tone broke down any resistances I had. The tears I had been holding back flowed down my cheeks.
Alcmene placed a reassuring hand on my shoulder. "It's all right my dear. You're safe now."
I knew at that moment that she knew what happened. Alcmene never thought kindly of my father. She heard around town that Skouros had returned home from battle a few days previous. I watched in silence as she heated water for a bath and helped me out of my ruined clothes. She shuddered at the haunted look in my eyes. She knew the kind of man Skouros was. She had tended more bruises on Iolaus than she cared to think about. But to do something like this to his own daughter was more than Alcmene could bear to think about. She settled me in the tub of steaming water and left the room when I asked to be left alone. She returned a short while later with new clothes for me to wear. I was incredibly thankful for this woman. Ever since I came to dinner all those years ago I was a frequent visitor. We would spend countless hours in the kitchen or garden together while the boys played their adventure games. I suspect she also knew of the crush I had developed on her son. Alcmene showed me what it was like to have a loving mother. I'll never forget the day she took me in her arms and told me she loved me. I had become the daughter she never had. She comforted me like a daughter that night. I heard her in her bedroom when she thought I was sleeping. She was crying for my lost innocence.
The next morning I begged her not to tell Iolaus what had happened. At first she didn't agree with me, but I made her see how it would make him feel. The guilt would have eaten him alive. Alcmene did say she would make an appointment with the Magistrate to report Skouros, but she never got the chance. Father was called back into battle. A few short weeks later I went to Alcmene's house to tell her the General was killed. I never mourned my father's death. I don't think Iolaus did either. We hid all of our emotions knowing no one would understand the relief and joy we felt knowing we would never see him again.
It wasn't long after our father's funeral that Iolaus graduated from the Academy. When Hercules left to perform his labors Iolaus and I spent a lot of time together. The pain of what my father had done to me had not faded. I was fearful of all men except my brother and Hercules. I felt vulnerable and defenseless. I knew I had to take matters into my own hands. I asked Iolaus to train me to fight. I wanted to learn everything he was taught at the Academy. I made a promise to myself that no man would ever take advantage of me again. Thanks to Iolaus, none ever did.
I left my mothers house choosing to make my home in the forests surrounding Corinth. I lived quite happily off the land. I preferred a solitary existence. No one could hurt me that way. I did spend quite a few nights at Alcmene's when the weather would turn bad. I watched as my brother and Hercules turned from boys to men. My childhood crush on Hercules had transformed into a heartfelt friendship build on respect. I was truly delighted when I saw both of them marry. I would always get a lecture from everyone when I returned to visit at holidays. It was the same old story; I didn't visit often enough. Iolaus had done well for himself. He had an amazing son and a beautiful wife who was about to give him another child. Hercules was fortunate as well. Deianeara was good woman who had given him 2 healthy sons. She had announced not too long before that she was expecting another child as well. Everyone was welcoming, but I couldn't put myself at ease watching the 2 families interact. Iolaus called me on this one sunny afternoon.
I was perched on top of the partial wall Hercules was building around Alcmene's house. Iolaus and the 3 boys were playing in the field just beyond the fruit trees. I always loved watching Iolaus play with the children. He became like a child himself. Ania had called the children in for lunch. As he watched them run inside Iolaus made his way towards me.
"You amaze my sometimes big brother," I smiled at him.
"Only sometimes?" he joked with me. He was rewarded with a playful slap to his shoulder.
"No seriously Al," he laughed. "What did I do?"
"Just watching you play with the kids. You always know what to say or do. They love you."
"They love you too you know." He responded putting his hands on his hips.
"It's not the same. I don't know how to act around them." I sighed.
"All you have to do is be yourself," he replied. I sat and thought about what he had said. There were a lot of things I didn't understand that I wanted to relay to him. I just couldn't figure out how to do it. I guess Iolaus saw that I was thinking pretty hard. He hopped up on the wall next to me and stared at me with those piercing blue eyes.
"If you think any harder smoke's gonna come out of your ears," he teased. I laughed despite of myself. The laughter died and Iolaus sighed and shook his head. "What is it Al?"
I thought about it for a moment and decided to just dive in. "You are an amazing father Iolaus, and a wonderful husband. I watch you with your family and I'm just speechless. How do you do it?"
Iolaus thought for a moment and shook his head. "I'm not sure what you mean."
I pushed a stray hair off my forehead and continued, "I think back to our childhood and I remember how things were between our parents. You're older so maybe it was different for you, but I don't remember them ever being in love." I plucked a tall piece of grass and stared fiddling with it. "I also remember how they didn't take care of us. Father never loved us. He was ashamed. I think that's obvious from the way we were treated. Mother seemed to think of us as a burden. I know I drove her crazy. I was always underfoot."
"You were just a very energetic child," Iolaus ribbed.
"I know I was," I retorted. "I guess I just don't understand how you know what to do with your family. I know you love your wife. Everyone can see that. And Telaus adores you. You're the perfect family man."
"I wouldn't go so far as to say I'm perfect Al," he chuckled. "But I do think I know what your saying. First of all, thank you. It means a lot to me that you think so highly of my family skills. I'll be honest with you. It's not easy. And there is no handbook that you get when you get married telling you how to do everything. You just have to make it up as you go along. You make mistakes and learn from them and move on." Upon seeing my frown at his answer, he hurriedly continued, "You want to know one of my tricks?"
I looked at him skeptically but took the bait, "Yeah, tell me."
He leaned towards me like he was about to impart a deep dark secret, "Whatever situation comes up I compare to a similar event from our childhood. I think about what happened then and I do the exact opposite."
I looked at him incredulously, "You're kidding right?"
"No, I'm really serious," he answered. "Let's say I come home from working the fields and find that Telaus has broken the leg off the supper table." I squirmed at the memory of when I had done the same thing. "I see you remember what happened to us. How our father reacted?" I nodded in agreement. "So I would do the opposite. Instead of losing my temper and taking my anger out on him I would calmly ask what happened. If it were an accident I would hug my son and let him know that I loved him while telling him to try to be more careful around the house. If he was doing something that he knew he wasn't supposed to then I would punish him." I looked up at my brother shocked. He smiled at me reassuringly, "I would make sure the punishment fit the crime. I have never nor will I ever raise a hand to my family. That is a promise I made to myself a long time ago."
I looked at him and smirked, "I think I understand."
"I don't think you do yet," he said with an impish grin. "You won't fully understand until you fall in love and start a family of your own. When I was younger I was scared. I was terrified that I would wind up exactly like our father. Then I met Ania. Her presence in my life broke down all of my fears. My heart opened and I knew all I could do was love her. I pray to the Gods that you find that Al."
I looked into his eyes and I felt the sincerity of his words. He pulled me into a heartfelt embrace and I felt something that was broken inside me start to mend. We were pulled from the moment by Alcmene's soft laughter. "You two better come in soon. With the appetites of these children, I don't know how much food is going to be left."
Ania died in childbirth 2 months later. Not too long after that Telaus succumbed to influenza. I watched my brother laid his family in the ground and my heart broke. He was hurting and there was nothing anyone could do. He left a few weeks after the funeral. He said he was heading East to find himself. During the year he was gone I traveled myself. I became familiar with the ways of the amazons. Although my interaction with Iolaus healed my deep resistance to having a husband and children, I felt it wasn't my purpose in this life. I found family with my sisters of the Amazon Nations. I learned with them, loved with them and fought besides them. Iolaus returned renewed and rejuvenated, but the joy of having him back didn't last long. Hercules lost his family at the will of Hera. The healing process began again. In the years that followed I sometimes journeyed with Iolaus and Hercules. My days were filled with adventure. In my travels I heard that mother had remarried. His name was Pandion and he was a poet. I thought at the time that Mother couldn't find a more extreme opposite to my father if she tried. I visited them often. My healing continued as I watched my mother finally find happiness.
My world crumbled a few years later. First I got word that Alcmene died. I grieved as if she were my own mother. I took comfort in the fact that she was in the Elysian Fields with her grandchildren. The void she left in this world I still feel today. A few months later I received word from Sumeria. Nebula had sent a message saying that Iolaus had been killed. Hercules had left for parts unknown and Greece was without it's 2 heroes to protect it. Words cannot express the agony I felt over losing my brother. He had died before, but Hercules was always able to retrieve his soul from the clutches of Hades. With Hercules gone I knew Iolaus couldn't be saved. I wandered the countryside in my grief. I did my best to avoid all human contact. I was in Macedonia on a rare visit to a tavern when I heard Iolaus had returned. As I traveled home I heard more. I was overjoyed when I heard that my brother was somehow returned to us newly reincarnated as a God of Light. My joy was shattered when I finally got to see him. After a few minutes of speaking to him I comprehended that a dark entity had taken his body. Hercules returned with forces to save the day. My heart was filled with hatred for him as he had abandoned my brother's body in a foreign land. I felt it was his fault for not watching my brothers back. Isn't that what he always promised to do? I still fought by his side as we were united by a common goal. We fought to save my brother's soul and we succeeded. Iolaus had finally found peace in the Light. Although I was devastated by his death I took some small comfort in his reward. I mended my relationship with Hercules. He fought for Iolaus harder than any of us. Looking at him without my brother at his side was like seeing half a person. I returned to the Amazons and he left with Morrigan. It was not for long though. We found our way together again a short time later. Our common grief was our bond. We traveled together like specters only going through the motions of living. Our reason for existing lost to us seemingly forever. I say seemingly because my brother was never one to stay dead for long.
He returned to us with a warning. Our way of life was being weighed and the scales were not tipping in our favor. Having just reunited with Iolaus I was hesitant to leave him. But it was decided that we needed to split up to do the most good. While Hercules and Iolaus were off fighting a rogue archangel, I was in the villages trying to provide comfort and healing to the afflicted. I'm not completely sure how they pulled it off, but they managed to save the world … again. The reward was greater than any of us could have imagined. Hercules and I were elated. Our prayers had been answered by a dark winged Angel and Iolaus was again at our side.
Before Iolaus was reintroduced to society as being back among the living, we decided to take an impromptu vacation. We traveled to a favorite fishing hole we had frequented as children. It was there that our healing continued. I noticed after the first couple of days that Iolaus was avoiding me. We would sit and talk, but the topics were all very general and benign. I could feel something simmering under the surface. Hercules could tell as well. He approached me on the 3rd day.
"Alara, I need to speak to you about Iolaus."
"You feel it too?" I queried.
I could see the confirmation in his eyes as he looked across the clearing where Iolaus sat tending the fire. "There's something going on with him. I don't know what it is." I could feel his uncertainty. Concern was flowing off of him like waves.
"He hasn't spoken to you about it?"
"No," he sighed. "What if he regrets coming back? What if.." he left the rest unsaid. I hurriedly shook my head in disagreement. "I don't believe that Hercules. And I don't think you do either. We both know this is where Iolaus wants to be."
"So what's wrong with him?" he pleaded.
"I don't know. He hasn't said anything to me other than ordinary conversation." I placed an encouraging hand on his arm. "I'll talk to him. Maybe this time I'll be more direct."
The tension he had been holding in his body eased a bit. "I'll go catch us something for dinner. I could use something other than fish," he mused. Feeling considerably better he headed off into the woods.
As I headed over to Iolaus I couldn't help but laugh. During my conversation with Hercules he had managed to triple the size of the fire.
"Are you building a distress signal?" I called to him.
He looked up sheepishly, "Just keeping busy I guess."
As I sat down on the log beside him I teased, "You're supposed to be relaxing Iolaus. That's what vacations are for."
He looked towards the setting sun and took a deep breath. "I'm sorry, I just can't seem to relax. I have a lot on my mind."
"I've noticed." I shot back.
He looked up at me and said with a self-conscious shrug, "Is it that obvious?"
"Extremely," I replied dryly. "I know you haven't spoken to Hercules about it. Can you talk to me?"
A defeated looked swept across his face as he hung his head, "It's not that easy Al."
I hated seeing him like this and wanted desperately to make him feel better. "Are you sorry you left the Light?" I blurted out. I didn't mean to be quite so direct, but it got a response. His head shot up and his eyes bored into mine, "Is that what you think?"
"I don't know what to think Iolaus. Ever since you've been back you've built this wall around yourself. I know that the Light was wonderful, beyond words. How can this place live up to that?"
He shook his head, "No Al, here is wonderful. This is where my home is, my family. I wouldn't trade that for anything."
I chewed my lip pondering his words, "So what's wrong?"
Iolaus rubbed his hand across his brow, and then looked thoughtfully up at me. I could see him debating something. Sighing, he said quietly, "Al, there's something I have to tell you. It's not going to be easy for me to say, or for you to hear."
"Alright," I said hesitantly.
"You know when Dahak was here that I existed inside of him?" he asked with a frown.
I nodded understandingly, "Yes, your soul was inside of him."
"That's right," he continued. "What you didn't know was that Dahak had a gift of sorts. When he came into contact with someone, if their hearts were open, he could see into them and know everything about them. When he could he used the information he gathered to torture me."
Genuinely concerned I reached for his hand, "That must have been so awful for you. I'm so sorry Iolaus."
He forced out a laugh that sounded more like a bark, "You may not feel that way when you hear what else I have to say."
Startled by his words I watched him take in a shaky breath. While I was curious as to what he was about to tell me, my stomach churned in dread.
"Do you remember when you came to the temple looking for me?" he asked. I did remember that day. I had heard that Iolaus had returned as the God of Light. Seeing that gods had fled Greece all their temples were dedicated to his name. I was told all I had to do was pray and the God of Light would reveal himself. I entered a temple once dedicated to Ares and knelt at the altar. My hands were shaking and I hardly dared to hope I would see my brother again. Before my mouth could even form words he appeared beside me.
"You thought you were with me," Iolaus continued pulling me out of my memory. "It wasn't me you were with in that temple."
"It was Dahak. I realized that after talking with him." I replied quietly. I watched as he shivered despite sitting next to a roaring fire. "What is it Iolaus?" I questioned.
"When you were in that temple and you thought you were with me, your heart was open," he answered with a shaky voice. At first I didn't understand what he had meant. I thought about it for a moment and it hit me. Dahak had used something from me to torment Iolaus. I sat there frozen wondering what it was. I was about to ask when Iolaus continued, his voice thick with emotion, "I'm sorry Al. I'm so sorry!" he pleaded. Tears were falling from his eyes as I sat horrified wondering what this could mean. "He saw it all, and he showed me. He showed me what a failure I was!"
Finally snapping out of my daze, I grabbed Iolaus by the shoulders and forced him to look at me. "Tell me Iolaus!" I demanded. "What did he show you? What did that monster show you?"
"He showed me how I wasn't there for you. How you used to cry in bed at night after I left. I saw how our father used to beat you!" he sucked in a shaky breath. His bloodshot eyes met mine. "He showed me what happened to you in the barn." His words came out as a whispered moan. At first I didn't know what he was referring to. As realization seeped in, my hands dropped from his shoulders and I looked at him completely horrified. He knew what our father had done. I had kept it from him for all those years in order to protect him. Now I knew he would take the blame himself.
"I'm so sorry Al." he sighed sincerely, reaching out to take my hand.
"Don't be sorry Iolaus," I countered. "It was partially my fault."
He looked sharply at me. "What? How can you say that?" he asked, his voice filled with shock and dismay.
" I was afraid," I answered flatly. "That's what he wanted and I knew that, but I couldn't stop myself. If I was stronger-"
"You were a child!" Iolaus interrupted. "I should have been there to protect you."
We both sat in silence lost in our own thoughts for a few moments.
"Why didn't you ever tell me?" he asked quietly.
"I never told anybody," I replied, "not even Alcmene, although she figured it out for herself. It's in the past now Iolaus."
"I abandoned you Al. Because I wasn't there for you when we were kids your heart had been filled with pain. How can you not hate me?"
I looked at him. The firelight caught the highlights in his golden hair. It looked like he had a halo, like he truly was from the Light. The firelight also caught the tears glistening on his cheeks. My heart broke for him. After everything we had been through together I couldn't understand how he could ask that question.
"I have never hated you," I started. Iolaus cut me off my turning away from me and facing the fire.
"I don't believe that," he spat. "I've only caused you pain."
"Look at me Iolaus." I insisted impatiently. Stubborn as ever, he refused.
"Look at me!" I demanded again making sure the tone of my voice brooked no arguments. I guess it worked. With a deep sigh Iolaus turned towards me. "Now listen to me, " I implored. "If Dahak could show you what was in my heart then you will know what I say is true. I could never hate you. You're my big brother. I was always so proud of you. You left a terrible situation at home and no one blames you for that. You had to do it for you survival and your sanity. What happened to me was not your fault. The blame for that lies with Skouros. You've worked so hard to overcome the example our parents had set. You graduated from the finest Academy in Greece. You dedicate your life to helping people. You're Greece's hero!" I reached my hand out and wiped the tears from his face. "Don't you realize Iolaus? Don't you know? You've always been my hero. I could never hate you, not ever."
I carefully watched his face as my words sunk in. His face crumbled and fresh tears gathered in the corners of his eyes. I closed the gap between us and pulled him into an embrace. As I held him I whispered, "Do you have any idea how it's been here without you? Yes, we've gone on but that's only because the sun rose every day and our bodies continued to breath in and out. We haven't been living Iolaus; we've only been going through the motions. Ever since you left we haven't been whole. We went on helping people to honor you, but without you wasn't the same." I took a deep breath as I fought to speak around the lump in my throat. "My relationship with you had been the biggest blessing in my life. It's because of it that I've healed. What's past is past. Let's let it all go and look toward the future ok?" I felt him nod against my chest. Swallowing I placed a kiss in the golden curls on his head. "I love you big brother."
I felt his arms tighten around me and I heard a muffled "I love you too sis."
Iolaus and Hercules traveled together, helping people who crossed their paths for many years after Dahak. Jason spent most of his time at the Academy, so I graciously accepted his offer to stay at the house he shared with Alcmene. I now plant and tend the gardens just like I used to with Alcmene when I was a child. The house was again a home base for all of us. Whenever traveling became too much for them, Hercules and Iolaus always found their way to my door. It was a safe haven and it was always home to them. Their visits tended to get longer and longer. Retirement from the hero business was sounding more appealing. Iolaus now works part time with the blacksmith in Corinth. Hercules teaches with Jason at the Academy. They have finally settled down. But in a moments notice I knew they wouldn't hesitate to aid anyone coming into town looking for the help of Hercules and his partner Iolaus.
Finis