Disclaimer: I don't own Samurai Deeper Kyo. I'm merely borrowing them for a bit.
A/N: I was talking to my bff Rhonds, and I was whining about not being able to make one big one shot again and she was like 'well break it into parts' and I agreed cuz im lazy so it's in parts. Short ones. Summer vacation has started and these five young adults will start out on a journey, the destination unknown (even to the author) Rated for language, implied things, oocness, drinking and driving (its bad), alcohol, girly mags, etc. I'm sorry if this totally sucks big hairy monkey balls. Something's wrong with me, mentally. But you already know that. HotIceRed semi-proudly presents:
Motel 6
Section one: Ride with me
"This is it?" questioned the teen, a skeptical sneer on his face as he eyed the small car.
The one eyed teen puffed his chest out with pride, "You're so impressed you're speechless." He nudged the crimson eyed teen and the pink haired female simultaneously, a pleased grin tugging at the corners of his lips.
"There's a plaid shirt in place of the window," The blond teen pointed out, actually taking it upon himself to prod at the cloth curiously. "The tape isn't helping," he added, golden eyes observing the gray duck tape slowly peeling off the top of the window.
"Shut up Hotaru," the one eyed male snapped irritably, "and leave that alone! It's there for a reason!"
"Yeah, cuz you're too cheap to invest in a new window," muttered the youngest of the five, crossing his arms over his chest.
"Bon, this has got to be the shittiest car in existence," The crimson eyed teen stated, dragging a scrutinizing eye across the vehicle, "I bet the ignition won't even turn."
"Oh this baby'll do all sorts of fancy tricks," purred Bon, gently patting the driver's side door, a sickeningly parental expression on his face.
The pink haired female blanched, "I'm so disgusted I could spit," she muttered. "Kyo, I feel faint! Hold me," she whined, reaching out for her knight in shiny leather pants.
"Now I feel sick," mumbled the youngest, scowling at the pink haired girl. "Akari at least give Kyo some breathing room," he chided.
Akari swiveled around to glare at the teen, "Do you have a problem with my display of affection, Akira?" She hissed as she leaned forward, her eyes narrowed into malicious slits. "Need I remind you of your fear of the dark?" At that moment, gray storm clouds rolled by, darkening the blue sky eerily.
Akira recoiled, mouth agape in dismay, "Y-You monster," he gasped, leaning his body against the car for support.
Akari straightened, beaming a cheery smile as if nothing happened, "Now if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all? Isn't that what I used to tell you when I babysat you as a baby?" she cooed.
The clouds dissolved, and the sun once again shined down upon the teens.
The strawberry blond flushed in embarrassment, "Akari!!" he growled, clenching his fists.
Akari smiled, "What's the matter? Gotta poop?"
"Yeah, we wouldn't want to stop on the road," The other blond chimed in with an eager nod.
"S-Shut up!! Don't patronize me you ingrate!" Akira howled loudly, slamming an open palm against the hood of the car.
"OI! Don't damage the merchandise or you'll be paying for it you brat!" Snapped Bon, brows knit together in a frown.
"This thing isn't even worth thirty bucks," Akari stated, hooded eyes regarding the car in contempt.
"Who's driving?" Kyo piped up, a cigarette dangling lazily from his slightly parted lips.
Bon shot a glare at Akari, and then glanced at Kyo, "Well I am of course. I'm the only one who can handle my baby," he replied.
"You make it sound like you're having secret dungeon sex with your car," The other blond bluntly stated. And as an afterthought (as if he has thoughts of those kind), moved a few steps back from the car.
His companions stared at him, at a loss for words. Then eyed the car with various stages of disgust and pity.
Finally,
"What kind of porn have you been watching?" Kyo asked, quirking an eyebrow in puzzlement.
Hotaru opened his mouth to reply, but was cut short,
"Don't ask him that!!" Bon hissed, "I don't want to know about his sick little fantasies!!"
"…Maybe we should take my car," Akari offered, casting an unsettling glance at the car.
"I haven't been sexing up my car!" bellowed Bon, "Besides girls in the backseat," he added with a lecherous grin.
Akira snorted, "Psh, we all know that's a lie." He uncrossed one of his arms and placed his fingers against his chin, "The only action this crap heap has seen is Bon and his hand."
Bon's left eyebrow twitched, "You little shit!"
Before a fight could break out, Kyo interrupted,
"I'm driving. Give me the keys." He waited expectantly for Bon to hand them over.
Bon had other ideas, "Hell no! It's my car, I'm driving! There's no way I'm letting your drunk ass drive us right into a telephone pole."
Kyo scoffed, "That was once. And Hotaru was in the front seat doing"
Akira visibly gagged, while Akari obtained a little tick on her forehead. Hotaru remained in a haze of impassive obliviousness.
"Look, all I know is, you've got like three DUI's. I'm not taking any chances," Bon solemnly replied.
The two of them stared each other down for a few moments.
"Oooh Kyo's so manly. Go Kyo!" Akari cheered, pumping a fist into the air.
"A staring contest? No fair, me too!" Hotaru groused.
"This is going to end in about two seconds," Akira observed, smirking knowingly.
As if on cue, Kyo suddenly kicked Bon in the abdomen.
He gasped in shock and fell to his knees clutching his belly, "Kyo you bastard! You cheated," he whimpered.
Kyo chuckled darkly, "Don't be a pussy." He nodded to Akira, who fished the keys from Bon's jacket pocket and handed them to the crimson eyed teen.
Kyo jingled them triumphantly, "Now, get your asses in the car. And don't forget the cooler."
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Juggling a beer in one hand and a cig in the other, Kyo expertly steered with his knees while Akari stared at him adoringly.
"My, this traffic is awful," she commented.
Bon was mortified. "Kyo! That's no way to handle my baby! If you get us in a wreck I'm going to rip your balls off!" he growled.
"You would want to touch his balls, wouldn't you Bon?" Akira teased, "I always knew there was a little queer in you."
"That's called gay-dar Akira," Hotaru helpfully pointed out.
"Yes, it's a very useful thing to have," agreed Akari, batting her eyelashes at a distracted Kyo.
Kyo was distracted because the car kept swerving in and out of the opposite lane.
From his perch in the middle of the back seat between Bon and Hotaru, Akira didn't feel comfortable or safe. At all.
You see, he had to use all of his energy to keep perfectly in the middle, not allowing a single inch of his body to touch the other males. Alas, that wasn't working.
Hotaru glowered at him, "Your leg is touching mine." He kicked at the younger teen irritably.
Akira scowled, "No, yours is touching mine! Bon's so fat he takes up all the room in here, so I'm forced to one side!" he reasoned. But with Hotaru, there was no reasoning.
"Whatever," Hotaru grumbled, resorting to stare boredly out the window at the passing scenery.
In the front seat, Akari was positively giddy, "Kyo, would you like another beer?"
Those dreamy (in her opinion) crimson eyes focused on her for a split second before returning to the road as he grunted his affirmative.
Needing no second urging, Akari reached into the cooler at her feet and grabbed a nice cold can of beer. She popped the top open and handed it to him with a smile.
Bon pouted, "I want a beer too. Why can't I get the nice treatment?"
Akari ignored his plea and went back to flirting with Kyo, "So Kyo, what kind of conditioner do you use? It's so soft and shiny."
"You frigid bitch." mumbled Bon moodily.
A can of beer came hurtling into the backseat and smacked him in the mouth.
The one eyed man reeled back grasping at the pieces of his shattered teeth and gurgling in pain.
Akira retrieved the beer, only to have it snatched out of his hands,
"HEY!" he protested loudly, glaring at the culprit.
Hotaru victoriously popped the beer open and took a swig, "No beer for the kiddies."
Bon continued to weep mournfully over the remnants of his shiny yellowed teeth, mentally cursing pink haired fanboys.
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They all smelt it simultaneously. The stench of rotting eggs, month old gym socks and to be quite frank: Shit.
Hotaru made a mad dive for the window, jiggling the little button, but it wouldn't open. He made a panicked noise in the back of his throat and gagged.
Akira slapped a hand over his mouth and nose, little choking sounds muffled by his fingers.
"WHO THE HELL DID THAT?!" Shrieked Akari, her window already pulled down as far as it could go, nostrils pinched between her index and thumb as she seethed angrily.
Kyo glared back into the rearview mirror. His window was down as well, the cool, sweet scent of exhaust fumes, grass, and stale heat filtering into the car.
"Bon," he growled, narrowing his crimson eyes dangerously.
The culprit sniggered in amusement, "What can I say, I forgot to go before we left. Plus, that's what you get for dissing my awesome car," he stated.
The locks of the car doors mechanically clicked.
His mouth and nose still covered, Akira dove past Bon's legs for the latch of the door and jerked it upwards, opening it. Cool air spilled into the back seat, but Bon was undisturbed.
He teetered backwards a little, but laughed it off and braced himself against the seat, "Nice try, brat. No one can move the rock that is Bontemaru-sama," he boasted.
With a nod of agreement, Hotaru and Akira shoved together, forcing Bon into the door and rolling out of the car.
The car puttered along slowly as the occupants of the car ignored the one eyed teens enraged shouts as he landed in the midst of the intersection.
Akira slid into Bon's previous seat and quickly pulled the door shut. The doors locked.
A comfortable silence reigned.
"Are we there yet?" Asked Hotaru curiously.
The doors abruptly unlocked.
"Never mind, jeez," the blond muttered sourly, slumping backwards in his seat.
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Oh my god, I love you Bon. (huggles him) okay part 2 will be whenever. Please read and review, no flames por favor. If you see any errors, please kindly point them out and I'll try not to be too embarrassed. EDIT: Yeah I went back and fixed some crap. (thank you Satri!) Still, if you see anything I missed, let me know.
HotIceRed