Title: What I Want is Love
Author: Mrs. Patrick Kenzie
Rating: T
Pairings: Pangie...DUH!
Summary: Inside Angie's head somewhere at the begining of "Sacred."
Warnings: None.
Disclaimer: I own none of the events mentioned from the book, and unfortunately I don't own Patrick Kenzie, Angela Genarro, Grace Cole, Phil Dimassi, Gerry Glynn, or Desiree Stone. If I did, I'd be a very, very happy girl. Not to mention, kinda rich.
Reveiws: Yes, please.
Over the course of my life so far, I've been shot by an ex-cop, beat by a husband, sexually harassed by many clients. But nothing, I mean nothing in this world, has been harder than not crying every time I see my partner, Patrick Kenzie.
Patrick and I have a messy relationship. We grew up together, deflowered each other at the ripe ol' age of sixteen, and have been avoiding our feelings ever since. But lately, with the endless string of bimbos parading through his bed since Grace, and the lack there-of in mine since Phil, I've been wondering what might have happened if we had stayed together all those years ago.
See, Patrick and Phil were best friends. Patrick and I were best friends. Phil and I? We were just each other's safety blankets. After me and Parick, you know, did the deed, I couldn't face the truth. I had always been in love with him. So I married Phil. And Patrick married my sister, Renee. Phil and I stayed together for twelve years. Patrick and Renee stayed together for twelve days. After the divorce, Patrick adopted his playboy ways. New girl almost every week, if they were lucky every month.
Phil and I were happy for awhile. But then, Phil started drinking heavily. And then, he started hitting me. I remember the look on Patrick's face the day the beatings became visible. I'd only seen that face once before. It was a few days after his old man burned him with the iron. It was the look of revenge. The last thing I remember saying to Patrick was, "Be sensible." Next thing I knew, Phil was in the hospital after coming up close and personal with a pool stick after he and Patrick had a few "sensible" drinks. Patrick was very proud at the way he had spun that.
But since that night, Patrick has backed off, unwillingly. He makes it known he wants to see Phil's large intestine, without the help of any medical machines. He also makes it known, that he'd like to see me in his apartment, sans clothing. And everytime the subject is breached, I shoot him an, "In your dreams, Skid." Not really his dreams, more like mine. Trust me.
I admit, there have been a few occasions where I believe Patrick's feelings are honest, but mostly I know it's because he's a guy, and he hasn't seen me naked (in 16 years at least). But on those rare days, I catch this gleam in his eyes, and I want to just forget about our past, forget about Phil and Grace, and all the other women, and jump his bones.
But I can't, because ever since Phil died, and Grace was out of the picture, I've had a voice in my head, telling me if we were meant to be together, it would have happened already. I mean sure, there was that "incident" on the last night to the Gerry Glynn case, but that was pure lust. What I wanted was love. And unless this Desiree Stone is still alive somehow, and gets to him first, I'm going to get it.