Title: Coming Clean
Author: ArbiterDeliberata
Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing: Harry Potter/Albus Severus Potter, mentions and flashbacks of Albus Severus Potter/Scorpius Malfoy
Rating: Mature (Language, explicit sexual content)
Summary: It's Easter holiday and Harry just won't leave his son alone about the lasting effects of the attack from a fellow student months before. Albus resorts to drastic measures to get his Dad off his back about the whole thing.
Or: Harry tries to be a good dad, Albus is a ball of angst, and everyone is mortified.
Warnings/Tags: Underage; parent/child incest (voyeurism/masturbation); dubious consent where everyone is conflicted and turned on and creeped out by being turned on; Albus' internal dialogue gets a tad dark; light sadism; humiliation; masturbation; knotting; angst and porn; moderate to major feels; porn with plot; Harry just wants to understand, Albus just wants to be left alone.
Author's Notes: This plot bunny wouldn't leave me alone after I finished writing 'Nodos Luporum' (which is Latin for "the knots of wolves"). You'll need to read 'Nodos Luporum' to understand this one-shot, although that story overall is Albus/Scorpius and doesn't hinge on anything written here. You can read 'Nodos Luporum' without reading this. Think of this as a canon-adjacent, optional one-shot interaction that could have happened. If you're offended by Pottercest, please move along….
'Coming Clean' takes place a couple weeks after the end of 'Nodos Luporum'.
Coming Clean
The Easter holiday was winding down quickly. It had been a chilly week. Spring seemed to be coming later this year, but it was a welcome relief to spend a few days back at home, away from the constant crowd of students. Even James had decided to come home for the holiday and it was good to see him again. I'd spent several evenings that week watching Mum, Dad and James play Quidditch in the garden while Lily and I chatted about school. Lily was keen to get back to it – or at least keen to get back to her new boyfriend, a fifth-year Slytherin Prefect that I liked well enough – but I found that I'd enjoyed the break even though I missed Scorpius greatly and was aching to see him again.
The train back to Hogwarts would be leaving tomorrow morning and my stomach did somersaults at the thought of several hours of time alone in a compartment with Scorpius. A few of our usual warding spells on the door and perhaps two or three Muffliato charms as well, just to be sure, and we'd be a pile of bliss by the time we got back to school. Train rides were a highlight of holidays now – although Scorpius and I made a point to smuggle snacks from the Kitchens so we never had to answer the door for the Trolley Witch, or whatever the hell creature she actually was.
I'd spent the morning with my family wandering through Diagon Alley, restocking on supplies for Potions while Dad and James mooned over racing brooms together and Mum and Lily reserved copies of new books due to release soon. We visited Uncle George and Uncle Ron at the joke shop and ran into several cousins also on their last day home. When the wind picked up and rain began to fall later in the morning, we all took shelter at the Leaky Cauldron for lunch. Uncle Ron and Aunt Hermione were chatting with Mum and Dad and Uncle George and Aunt Angelina while my cousins all laughed and gossiped and complained about school.
We spent hours there before Aunt Hermione invited us all over for dinner, despite the fact that we'd already had a large family dinner at the Burrow with the entire Weasley clan just a few days before. I begged off with the excuse that I hadn't completed my Astronomy essay or finished packing. Dad seemed to appreciate the out as well, saying he had paperwork from a case to finish – an excuse that thrilled Aunt Hermione ("Finally, Harry, I've been requesting that file on the Cooliage arrest for ages!") – so he'd Apparate home with me. I wasn't qualified to Apparate alone just yet; my exam was set for a week after my birthday in one more month.
After hugs and kisses from Mum and both of my aunts and waving goodbye to my cousins, I followed Dad outside to the alleyway. Once we were sure we were hidden from Muggle eyes, he wrapped his arm tight around my shoulders as we were squeezed into crushing oblivion for a few breathless seconds before the world righted itself and we were suddenly standing on our porch.
I stretched and rolled my neck. "Does that ever get more comfortable to do?" I asked.
Dad shrugged, "Not much, but it won't be as bad when you can control the Apparation yourself, rather than just riding side-along. Best get to your packing."
I smirked. "That was a little white lie, Dad. My packing and homework have been done since yesterday morning. I'm just…"
He smiled knowingly. "You've just had enough social interaction for one day," he finished, nodding slightly. "I hear you. It was a long day."
As I headed inside and started up the stairs, Dad called to me, "Hey, Albus, wait, I uh…"
I turned around and watched him from the third stair as he shut the front door.
"I've been meaning to ask you something and I guess now's as good a time as any since it's just the two of us, and you're leaving tomorrow, but um…" he trailed off again, looking a bit awkward and not quite meeting my eyes.
"Something wrong, Dad?" I asked, warily.
He shook his head, saying quickly, "Well, no, I don't think so, it's just…"
He seemed torn. Our relationship had improved greatly over the last couple years, but we still had moments of confusion and unease with each other. Sometimes I wished we were closer and I think he did too, but neither of us really knew how to achieve that.
When he didn't immediately answer me, I shrugged and continued up the stairs and into the bathroom. He was waiting for me just outside the door after I finished up a couple minutes later and he stopped me from leaving to go to my room. I was growing impatient and worried.
"Okay, seriously, Dad, what's up?" I asked, growing concerned.
He sighed and shook his head a bit, as though resigning himself to something.
"Listen, Albus, I know you must be sick of hearing about this, but I went to visit Azkaban last week for routine inspections with the Aurors stationed there, and Craglin caught me while I was making my rounds. He absolutely insisted that –" He broke off suddenly, looking a bit pained.
Well, fuck. I know where this is going.
"Whatever he said, he's just toying with you," I said, becoming exasperated. "Why do you let him get in your head like that?"
"Albus –"
The lie had become almost too easy for me over the last few months – Merlin knows how often I'd repeated it – but this time it was different. Dad actively steadied himself and that unnerved me. Very calmly, he looked back up at me and asked again.
"Albus. Was there any change to your body leftover after Craglin attacked you?" He asked quietly, although his voice didn't waver. He was direct and bold and that threw me off-kilter for a moment.
"Dad, we've talked about this –" I sighed, hoping that my expression of annoyance that this topic had come up again was a believable enough cover for my growing desperation to end the conversation. I couldn't leave, not with him blocking the doorway and watching me intently.
I sighed again, heavily. "Did you happen to mention to Craglin that I do not, in fact, still have a tail or paws?" I made myself busy in the only way I could just then. I turned away from him and turned on the tap to splash water on my face, hoping the sting of the cold water will make for a suitable explanation for the blush rising to my cheeks.
"I just… I need to know," he said in that same level tone.
I turned off the water and hung my head and sighed again, still leaning on the counter and not meeting his eyes in the mirror.
"I need to know that you're alright, Albus."
I closed my eyes, feeling defeated.
I promised him no more lies.
"I'm okay, Dad, really," I said, eyes still closed and trying to act tired rather than defensive. "Everything is perfectly fine."
"You're fine as in, no changes?" He asked slowly. "Or fine as in, something is different, but you're okay with it?"
I could feel his eyes drilling into the back of my skull; he was determined. And Harry Potter gets what he's determined to get. Always has, probably always will.
I could feel my resolve weakening, and my next words tumbled quickly out of my mouth before my better judgement could keep my mouth shut. "Would…would it matter if something was a bit different? Just a small change that didn't hurt me?"
My voice was small and high-pitched, pleading for understanding and approval – utterly childish.
His sigh filled the bathroom. It was unsteady, and I realized that he had been holding his breath. He was trying not to panic. I still couldn't look up at him, not even at his reflection.
"As long as…" he started. "As long as you're not hurt –"
"No, I'm not hurt," I said again, barely above a whisper. "I promise, it's no big deal, really."
And for a wild moment, I thought perhaps he was finally going to let it go. There were several long seconds of silence as he digested my confirmation.
"But then why didn't you just tell me?" He asked. "Why did you lie to me when I asked you all those times?"
I shook my head absently. Shit. I felt like we were suddenly back to 4th Year. We were back to skirting issues and disconnecting when things got tough and confusing. I hated this feeling.
I ran my hand through my hair and sighed, starting to needlessly wash my hands again just to have something to do.
"I didn't tell you because it's… personal," I said, swallowing thickly. "It's not something that I wanted to come out publicly in the Daily Prophet or in Court. And Craglin was still convicted and given the maximum sentence so it's not like it was terribly important to the case."
He was silent for a few moments, either processing what I'd said or expecting me to go on. When I didn't continue, he said carefully, "What do you mean by 'personal'?"
I couldn't deal with the tension anymore and I huffed out my exasperation, still not looking at him. "Look, it's not something that can be fixed, it's certainly not something I want my family knowing about, and it's not hurting me, so just… let it go, okay? Please."
I turned off the faucet and roughly swiped the hand towel off the towel bar, shaking my head, irritated, as a I dried my hands.
"Show me."
I looked up instantly and met his gaze in the mirror's reflection.
He can't be serious.
I could only stare at him, standing there a few feet behind me, still leaning against the door frame.
"Albus, please, whatever it is, I'm your dad, I won't be angry. And I won't judge. You can trust me with this." He was trying now for that soothing tone that worked wonders for me when I was a child having run into their room after waking up from a nightmare, but just then, it felt…wrong somehow.
"I won't tell your mum, if that helps."
He was proposing a deal? We were fucking bargaining for my privacy?
"Just like I never told her the details of the memory that you gave to the Wizengamot for the case," he continued.
I looked away from his reflection, my mind becoming frantic. I was still pointlessly clutching the hand towel.
"Just like I didn't tell her about…you and Scorpius," he finished quietly.
I spun and stared him dead in the eye, suddenly incensed.
How can he possibly know…?
His expression changed only subtly, as though unsurprised and slightly satisfied at my reaction. He nodded briefly and twitched the tiniest of smiles, "Aha, so I guessed right."
I froze. Wait, what?
"I had my suspicions that you two were more than just friends," he said simply, although not unkindly. "I'm fine with it, Albus, I am," he said quickly, holding up his hands in appeasement when I opened my mouth to defend my relationship with Scorpius. I felt my cheeks burn and sweat was starting to gather at my hairline.
"The Pensieve, Albus," he clarifies. "I saw it all."
Fuck, this is what I'd been afraid of. I knew we were too obvious!
"I know you two have been so close for years, and obviously have a deep trust and affection for each other," he said thoughtfully. "Then in the Pensieve memory, you and Scorpius were just too…flirtatious to be only friends. And you had an ease with it that told me that interaction wasn't the first time. Plus, when you were both Transfigured, I noticed that you two were nuzzling each other frequently when our backs were turned," he said, smiling fondly.
"You all saw that," I said dumbly, feeling far away and struggling to gather myself. I couldn't look at him.
"Why didn't you just tell me you were gay?" He asked curiously.
"Bi," I corrected him automatically, before even realizing that I'd spoken. I swallowed thickly, feeling hot and embarrassed. "I'm…bisexual. Although, Scorpius is the only guy I've ever... been attracted to. I still like girls."
I sounded so fucking lame.
He quirked an amused eyebrow along with a genuine smile. "Ah, well… okay. See? That wasn't so bad."
I was desperate for this conversation to end, and beginning to get angry over how he'd essentially just forced me to out myself to him. That wasn't how I'd been planning to tell anyone, not by a long shot, and I hoped that that revelation was enough to distract him from his original purpose of trying to wheedle me for information about the knot.
But no such luck.
"So this change from the spell…does Scorpius have it, too?" He asked nonchalantly, back to his casual charm.
"We're not discussing Scorpius," I spat angrily, glaring at him. So far in this exchange I'd only made direct eye contact with him out of shock or anger. And now, I felt I needed to protect Scorpius from Dad's prying.
He dipped his head, conceding. I knew what he was doing. Pushing me for something he knew he wouldn't get, in hopes he'll get something else instead that he really wanted all along. He was clever. Damn him.
When I didn't say anything else and just continued to watch him irritably, he sighed and crossed his arms. He was still leaning against the door frame, blocking my exit. He had that patented half-smile on his face, the one I'm sure he has deployed during many interrogations and court hearings to get all the information he wanted.
Sorry, Pops, but you're going to have to work for this.
"Al, look, I just need to know what happened. What if there are complications with the change in the future? I can't help you if I don't understand. Please, just tell me or show me."
My mind was starting to burn. I glared harder but held his gaze. You want it, old man? Fine. The regret and embarrassment I'll see on your face when you realize what you've done will be worth it.
Without dropping his stare, I slowly brought my hands to my belt and began to pull it open. The sound of the buckle coming undone, then the button of my jeans getting popped, were the only noises in the bathroom. He was painfully slow to realize what was happening, perhaps trying to believe that it was anything other than what it obviously was. A tinge of confusion settled into his expression, but he didn't react otherwise.
I sluggishly dragged the zipper down. The grating of the metal teeth was almost ear-splitting, echoing off the tiled walls in the otherwise silent room. I was holding my breath.
The seconds marched on and I became angrier the longer he didn't stop me. His brow furrowed minutely as I slid my hands back to either side of the waistline of my jeans and started to push them down slowly, millimeters of my skin becoming bare before him.
"Albus, what are you –?"
"This is what you wanted, isn't it?" I taunted loudly, halting my undressing. "You want to see what Craglin gave me? I already told you that it's personal, but hey, it's not like you've never seen a dick before." I was livid but luckily my voice didn't waver.
He finally looked genuinely uncomfortable and he blinked away from my glare. He stared around the room aimlessly for a moment, probably trying to reconcile his suspicions with what I'd just indicated to him, and trying to decide if he should even go on.
Just let it go, Dad. We can both walk away from this right now, probably angry and mortified, but none the worse for wear in the long-run. Please, just end this.
The bastard pressed on instead.
"Show me," he demanded again, nodding and steeling his expression. He demeanor had changed rapidly; he was professional and detached all of a sudden.
I realized just then that he was compartmentalizing this situation and I was almost in disbelief about that. "I won't… I won't laugh, if that's what you're worried about, or tell anyone. I swear, Albus."
I tried to convince myself that I would ultimately win this fight, that I just had to keep pushing him and waiting him out. He'll crack, right? He'll see what he'd been asking for – he'll see what it was doing to me – and he'll stop. Right?
Taking a deep breath, I toed off my shoes before shoving my jeans down and kicking them off entirely. To buy myself time, and in an effort to give him a chance to back off on his own, I left my underwear on and instead wrestled my shirt off, taking longer than necessary to wad it up and throw it on top of the heap that my jeans and shoes made against the tub.
His eyes raked over what skin I'd exposed, although I was vaguely relieved that his look truly is purely clinical; he was scrutinizing me for anything non-human.
His gaze was traveling back up my body, but I didn't have the guts to meet his eyes, so just before he began to skim over my face, I looked away from him. Before I could lose my nerve, I shoved my underwear all the way down and stepped out of them. I kicked them away, on top of my shirt, and kept my eyes glued to the clothes pile.
I was feeling… calm? Bored, even? Moments ago, the thought of getting completely naked in front of my dad had been horrifying but now that I was here, it felt almost like the situation wasn't even worth the stress it had caused me.
He literally asked for this, and at least he's not being too much of a prick about it right now.
He didn't move but in my peripheral vision I could see that his eyes had widened and were travelling all over me again, darting to my groin briefly and then away again, as though he were finally feeling a bit ashamed of himself for prying.
Mostly, I found that I was just supremely irritated and disturbed that I was half-hard at the moment.
He cleared his throat. "I – uh. I'm not sure I – what exactly should I be looking at here?" He was awkward and off-balance and now it was his turn to avoid meeting my eyes.
Good.
"Well, Dad, technically you shouldn't be looking at anything here," I snarled, finally feeling like I'd regained the upper hand. The sudden surge of anger combined with the constant flooding warmth of embarrassment only served to work me up more, and I could feel my pulse starting to pound, and with that, the tell-tale pressure beginning in the knot.
Oh, fuck no. No, no, no, no, no. Merlin, not here, not now!
And indeed, unbelievably, I was completely hard in moments, the knot thrumming in a way that I'd have normally reveled in, but just then it made me burn with shame, causing my agitation to flare once more.
I felt my hands shaking so I placed them behind my back, clutching onto the edge of the counter. I hissed out an irritated, humorless laugh, staring down at my aching, traitorous cock.
When I finally gathered the courage to look up, I saw that he was eyeing my groin, the calculating look back in his eyes. My cheeks heated again, and my mouth was dry; it burned when I tried to swallow.
"Is...is that…?" he started. His voice was low, but he was trying to keep it together. He started to shift one of his arms out from where he had it crossed over his chest and for a crazed moment I was convinced that he was going to try to reach out to take hold of me, so out of pure reflex, I whipped my hand back around and gripped my cock.
But he had merely been shifting a bit so that he could point, and I felt absurd. Here I was, naked as the day I was born, holding my rock-hard cock, barely more than a meter away from my dad, who was pointing tentatively to my groin.
Oh, to fucking hell with this.
The tension snapped in my brain and I was momentarily dazed to realize that my coping mechanism for this situation was to just suddenly not care anymore.
Before I could think anything through, I just blurted out an explanation, trying to sound as dry and monotone as though I'd been reciting it out of a textbook. "Yes, this is it. It's called a knot, it's part of canine anatomy. It swells during intercourse and the knot maintains its size and shape during and after ejaculation. I don't really understand the purpose of it, or why this trait specifically was what stuck during Craglin's spell, but that's what I've got and –" I sighed shakily, my rambling ending abruptly. "And so here we are."
My voice cracked ever so slightly on the last word, but I wasn't sure I could have felt anymore awkward than I already did.
He was still and silent for another couple beats before he said, "It doesn't look like much, honestly. What do you mean, it 'swells'?"
I finally met his eyes. Was I furious just then? Was I scared? Humiliated? I could have reasonably felt any combination of all those things and yet…I felt merely antagonized by his insistence at discussing this, and defiant of the whole situation.
"Like I just said," I bit out, "it gets bigger during sex. So unless you want to watch me fuck something right now, you're shit out of luck!"
He flinched a bit at my language and raised voice, but he didn't make any effort to tell me off. His eyes dropped again to my groin and under his stare I felt another deep throb that tightened and enlarged the knot a bit more, and I knew there was no way he'd missed it. His eyes flashed as he watched it, then they flicked back up to my face, looking astonished and a bit confused. Dimly, I realized that I still hadn't released my hold on myself.
With nothing better to do and no way of avoiding it, I continued on mechanically. "I can control it, to some extent. I can… I can come without knotting," I said, tripping ridiculously over the admission of orgasm, as though that were the most uncomfortable part of this situation. "But it's difficult. It requires a lot of concentration, and it makes enjoying sex a bit tougher."
Without thinking, I began to move my hand over my dick just a little, just to relieve a bit of the ache. But the automatic movement is enough to cause my breath to hitch. I was just too turned on – far more than I should have been – and the knot throbbed deeply again.
My eyelids slipped shut of their own volition and immediately, memories flooded into my head unbidden. All I could see just then was Scorpius beneath me on all fours, turning his head over his shoulder just enough to catch my eye, and his smile was wet and wrecked as my growing knot slid swiftly in and out of him. My head swam, the memory shifted, and now Scorpius was above me, hands splayed on my chest, pinning me down as he rutted into my hand, where I had both our cocks wrapped up together, the hot bulges of our knots pressed against each other. The memories swirl again and he was on his knees before me, in our compartment on the Hogwarts Express, with one hand shoved down the front of his trousers, pumping furiously, while his other jacked me off as he sucked at the head of my cock. I couldn't contain my shuddering moan.
My eyes opened to slits and I was momentarily confused; where was…?
Then suddenly I jolted back to reality and realized that I wasn't on the train, or in my dormitory, or in the Room of Requirement.
Oh no. Oh fuck.
No, I was still in my bathroom at home, naked and jerking off, standing just feet away…from my dad.
And he hadn't moved an inch or said a word. He hadn't backed out of the room and he hadn't told me to stop. He just stared at me slack-jawed and wide-eyed, a flush climbing all the way up his neck. His eyes were back on my cock now, even though I'd stopped my wanking entirely. The knot was swollen to about half of what it would be when I came and there was no way he could miss it.
"Shit," I hissed, trembling, genuinely mortified. "Fuck, Dad, I'm so sorry, I –"
"It's okay, Albus," he interrupted very quietly, calmly, his eyes wandering all over me again, taking in the complete picture of my arousal and humiliation. "It's fine, I understand."
I actually felt somewhat soothed by his quiet tone of acceptance in that moment. He released an unsteady breath and dropped his gaze back down to my erection.
"I think it's safe to assume that Scorpius has the same…?" He intoned, almost more to himself than to me.
My protectiveness and anger, ragged as they were at that point, flared a little and I was about tell him off for bringing up Scorpius again, but he stunned me into silence with his next whispered words:
"Does he fuck you with it?"
The sudden blood-rush that bolted through my skull almost caused me to pass out.
"Or do you fuck him with yours?"
I stumbled backwards and had to brace myself on the counter behind me, the air failing to return to my lungs despite my gasps. My heart raced in a dizzying mix of anger, anxiety, fear and arousal. Breathe, Albus!
"What?" I asked breathlessly, my mind spinning and pulse pounding. "Shit, Dad, you can't just – that's not even – completely out of line –"
"I actually do have the right to know if my underage son is engaging in sexual activity," he said dully, as though he was paging through a report at work. As though he wasn't just standing in the doorway of our bathroom watching me fall apart.
I was still gasping for breath. "We – we aren't – he's not…he doesn't want –" I stuttered nonsensically.
"Don't bother, Albus," he scoffed firmly, like he was finally sick of my shit and ready to tell me off – now of all times! – for lying to him. "I was sixteen once, too, you know, I remember the rush of hormones and the flood of need to –" He stopped abruptly, unwilling to give anymore of his teenage feelings away and I was grateful that I didn't have to hear any more of it.
He gathered himself. "But this, Albus… this is uncharted territory for any person, let alone the average teenage boy having all the usual thoughts and urges. I can't say I'd blame you if you are in fact…experimenting. Either on your own or with Scorpius. Just as long as you're safe."
His tone ended on a note of understanding and forgiveness that I hadn't expected. And it seemed so out of place that I looked up at him instantly. He truly wasn't taunting me or judging me, despite the fact that I was right there in front of him, raging-hard and desperate to knot.
I didn't know what to say, so I simply nodded, my throat tightening with unanticipated emotion. Then I looked away and hoped he'd leave. He should've just left me to my pathetic predicament and to finish myself off alone.
As if my luck could ever be that good.
"I still want you to show me," he said, readjusting his stance in the doorway. His calm tone was gone and replaced with something that my illogical reptilian brain interpreted as predatory. "Talk to me. Show me. Everything, Albus."
A stray thought of he can't possibly mean that fluttered briefly through my head but was readily dismissed by my arousal-soaked brain.
Fuck it. I give up. I completely give up. It couldn't get worse than this, so why the fuck not?
I sank to the floor, my back pressed to the cabinets, my legs splayed and my hand back to tugging lightly on my dick again.
He lowered himself to the floor as well and I couldn't help but notice that his own trousers appeared to be a bit tight in the groin. The thought would normally repulse me, but my raging lust made me just a bit proud to see that I was having an effect on him.
I scoffed humorlessly, shaking my head and leaning back, trying to get comfortable. "Right now, it's at about half of what it'll be. It gets big. I have to be careful, I could hurt a partner badly, so I've never knotted while inside someone."
"You always…pull out before?" …was the soft question coming from a few feet away. I didn't think I could look at him even though I'd resigned myself to finishing up in front of him.
"Always have to. We're – I'm careful. In dogs and wolves, a knot essentially locks the mating pair together, but their anatomy is built for it. Their evolution simultaneously developed both the knot and the ability to take the knot. With me…" I trailed off feeling uncomfortably blistered. I closed my eyes and spit into my hand before returning to my tossing, a bit relieved now that I'd slicked up a little.
I tried again, leaning my head back against the cabinet. "With me, this was a freak accident. I doubt there's anyone who can comfortably take my knot naturally, so I've learned to either keep it completely at bay, or else I only knot after pulling out."
"That's very…perceptive and noble of you, Al –"
"Oh, fuck off," I gritted out, irritated, my eyes still screwed shut, trying desperately to ignore everything about this situation as best I could. Hearing that voice drifting towards me in this too-small room while my cock was leaking precum made my mind sear horribly. I didn't need that patronizing tone at the best of times, I certainly didn't need it just then.
"And coming off a knot..." I started to pant as my knot grew and my hand sped up a bit more. I only narrowly managed to bite back a groan, but I ended up humming out my rough exhale anyway. "It's unlike anything else. It destroys me. It's minutes long – seriously, it just keeps going. No better feeling than th– ahh!"
I clenched my jaw and gripped my based below the knot to stop the tsunami about to drown me. My whole body was tense as I backed away from the edge. My eyes snapped open out of reflex and I regretted it immediately, because there was Dad still a meter away, at eye level, seated and leaning forward, eyes roaming unblinkingly all over me.
"…Minutes?" he whispered, dumbstruck.
I was too close to care that my tone had become pleading and breathless. "And I just gush cum. It feels never-ending."
"I wish…I wish I could feel that, Albus."
He didn't look away and didn't say anything more. I was getting dizzy now. My knot was finally full size. I squeezed my eyes shut again.
"I can't hold off –" I whined unevenly.
"Do it, Albus," came the whisper, and my mind mercifully let me hear it in Scorpius' voice and not Dad's.
I spat into my hand one more time and used it in combination with my precum and began my tossing again. My mind wandered to the last time Scorpius and I were together. It had been early last week, a few days before we'd left school for Easter break. We were in the Room of Requirement, this time on the plush green couch that the room always supplied us with. I'd been on my back with one leg thrown up over the back of it with Scorpius hovering over me, filling both my vision and my body entirely. He'd had a blissed-out smile on his face as he rolled and ground his thickening knot in and out of me rapidly, the angle making his cock swipe over my prostate on each of his drives. The fill had been maddening.
"Fuck, Scorpius, please –!" I'd begged, fisting my cock and pumping in time with his thrusts.
"No," he'd hissed, grabbing my hands and pinning my wrists above my head to the couch cushions, rutting harder into me.
"Yesss!" I'd sighed, seared by his boldness and becoming euphoric as his thrusts got harder and faster and then my orgasm exploded from me while he continued his unforgiving pace, my own knotted cock trapped deliciously between our wild, sweaty bodies.
Scorpius had taken one hand away from my wrists to use to block himself from pushing his fully-swollen knot into me just moments before he too shuddered into his dizzying, mind-melting orgasm, howling my name and drenching me from the inside.
It was the memory of my name shouted from those kiss-bruised lips that brought me back to the present and had me stumbling over the cliff, my orgasm arching my back painfully into the cabinet doors, the handles stabbing into my shoulders as the first pulse of cum ripped from me. I toppled onto my side, just like the first time I knotted alone in the shower all those months ago, but this time my face pressed into the soft bathmat in front of the sink rather than cold wet tile.
I knew I was a mess but I couldn't make myself care. My ears registered only a fraction of what I was babbling, mostly swears and Scorpius' name. My eyes were slits but even in my blurry haze I could still make out the shape of a man on the floor just in front of me, his shirt unbuttoned halfway, his hand palming at his own cock through his trousers but still valiantly resisting his obvious urge to tear open his belt and fly to just have at it completely.
My brain cruelly used what little functionality it had left just then to remind me who this man was and the second that knowledge hit me, I slammed my eyes shut tight again and sobbed. Sobbing in pleasure or humiliation, I didn't exactly know.
I rolled to my back, left arm pressed uncomfortably against the base of the cabinet, as the familiar waves took me down under again. I was coming so much that it almost felt like I was pissing, and I felt it continue to coat my skin. My mind was a blur of sex – some memories, some fantasies – and I was suddenly missing having Scorpius' mouth on me.
Merlin, what I wouldn't have done for a taste of his lips right then…
"Scorpius, please – f-fucking kiss me," I demanded. Lost inside my own head, I realized too late that I'd said it out loud, there in the present, in that goddamn bathroom, next to my goddamn father.
But my desperate plea was answered anyway in the worst possible way. A hot mouth did latch onto mine just then. A tongue began exploring my mouth and strong hands cupped my face and stroked over my jaw in practiced grace, returning my fervor in equal measure.
I no longer felt cum landing on my own skin and knew that it must have be hitting him instead. The realization made shame burn anew in my belly. It worsened when I felt him shift around a bit, never ceasing his admittedly incredible kisses, to slot a hard thigh between my legs, and it had me rutting recklessly against him. Then the orgasmic cycle restarted, and I was crashing and moaning all over again, this time while fisting his hair and biting his lip. I felt more than heard him grunt out his swear.
I desperately wished I could've stopped. My left hand had slid from the back of his head, down his shoulder, to clutch roughly his bicep. It must be painful because I heard him grunt as I squeezed tighter, but he didn't attempt to pull his arm out of my grip. He was still arched over me, holding my face with one hand, his other arm slung around my shoulders pulling me up against him, still returning my frantic kisses. My pelvis was uncontrollable against the hard planes of his thigh, his hip, his abdomen, and I bitterly and naively hoped against hope that the stiffness I felt pressed against my belly as he leaned over me wasn't exactly what I already knew it to be…
I felt dangerously light-headed all of a sudden, and then there was a strange jump in time where one second I was mindless with desire and disgrace, and the next second I was calm and drowsy, the tide having ebbed abruptly. I must have blacked out.
The warm weight and expert kisses had vanished in that lost moment as well, although my own hand still insisted on continuing its slide up and down my stripped cock for a bit longer. My body continued shuddering and shivering, my hips still rolling into my hand.
I somehow managed to find the strength to roll up to my knees and, supporting myself on my left arm, continue to wank with my right, my cock dripping onto the tile beneath me. I hung my head, letting my back and neck stretch. I could feel the end drawing near.
After several long seconds of stuttering, jerky thrusts, my body had finally had enough. I released my hold, clenching my cramped hand and tipped to my side, falling backwards, pressed once again to the cabinet doors, right where I'd started.
Without opening my eyes, I just focused on my breathing and slowly trying to get my head back in order. Bit by bit, I became more lucid, and with each passing second as awareness grew, I wished my mind would just stop. I wished it wouldn't be so quick to remind me of what had just happened; what I'd just done, and in front of whom I'd just done it.
I wished it would stopping reminding me who just kissed me senseless as I cried out my release.
And then…
Exhaustion.
Pure, complete…
Mental…
Physical…
Emotional…
Exhaustion.
I was nearly overtaken. I have always turned into a passed-out wreck after knotting but with this situation being as mad as it was, I was surprised that I was even still (mostly) upright.
"I'm sorry," came a panting, broken whisper from near the tub. "I'm so sorry, Albus."
"I know," I said, barely awake. "Me too." And I knew we both meant it.
I allowed myself to rest another few seconds (Minutes? Days? Weeks?) before I caught an unexpected second wind and become relatively cognizant in an instant. I didn't want to process anything just then; I just knew I needed to get off that floor and out of that bathroom and away from everything that had just happened.
A terrible idea occurred to me as I started to sit up. I made a slightly spastic grab for my wadded-up jeans and fished out my wand, then shakily Conjured a vial. I unstoppered it and pressed the lip of the bottle to my lower abdomen and dragged it upwards, scraping a long line of semen from my stomach and chest, letting the stickiness ooze slowly down into the vial. I stoppered it back up, then cast a slightly haphazard Cleaning Charm over myself and the floor around me to eliminate all the rest of the cum that I could see.
Dad didn't say anything as I lazily went about my magic, but continued to watch me intently, shamefaced and still utterly turned-on. His clothes were still wet and stained from my cum and I looked away the second I noticed it.
"I'll be hard for another hour or so, before the knot's swelling finally dies down," I said roughly, feeling a ludicrous combination of bleary and nonchalant. Why bother being embarrassed now?
When I was mostly certain that my legs could support my weight, I shakily pulled myself up, holding onto the edge of the counter for support.
"But right now, I'm fucking beat. I usually always pass out immediately after knotting." I placed the vial of my semen on the counter and started to shuffle, still naked, from the bathroom. I don't even care about my clothes.
"B-but…but what's the vial for?" He blurted out raggedly, just before I'd made it through the door.
I swayed drunkenly in my effort to turn back around to look at him. He was genuinely confused, and the look was satisfyingly at odds with his arousal, which was just too damn obvious right now between his flushed cheeks, his heaving breaths, and the bulge in his trousers. He must have absolutely ached.
I gave him a grin that was more than a touch mean. "You said you wished you could feel it, coming off a knot," I said. "I'm pretty sure Polyjuice Potion is a thing that still exists, and you shouldn't have a problem buying a ready-made batch from one of the more discreet Apothecaries." I smirked nastily as his eyes widened, disbelieving that I could possibly be suggesting exactly what is was I was suggesting.
"And while I know hair is the preferred item to be mixed in, if you're such a lech that you could stomach watching your own son masturbate, you shouldn't have much of a problem with my cum being what you get instead. Go on and use it, if you think you're man enough."
His expression was nearing horror but the bulge in his pants twitched anyway. Perhaps my euphoric high had begun to mix with my returning anger, but I was feeling brutally triumphant as I turned and walked away from the bathroom, where he was left sprawled pathetically on the floor, still hard and disheveled.
I managed to make it into my room and shut the door before my vision went spotty. I practically tripped into my bed mere moments before completely losing consciousness.
I slept straight through the entire night and fortunately it seemed that no one had checked on me even after the rest of the family came home from dinner. I awoke still naked and in the same position on my bed that I'd fallen asleep in.
I barely saw Dad as we gathered our belongings to take to the train station. He had somehow managed to busy himself with just about anything and everything around the house that it was actually believable to the rest of the family that he couldn't just sit down to drink his tea and eat breakfast with the rest of us.
James agreed to see off Lily and me before going back to his own flat. Dad rode in the Ministry car with Lily and James while I rode in a separate car with Mum. He pointedly avoided me as we went through the barrier to Platform 9 ¾ and he made and unnecessarily bigger show than usual of helping James get the trunks loaded onto the train. Mum pulled me into a hug and I surprised her with a kiss on the cheek, something I rarely did.
"See you in a couple months, Mum," I said, pulling away and she was smiling at me, chuffed that her nearly-grown son willingly hugged and kissed her in public.
"Be good, love. Study hard and say hi to Scorpius for me," she said, patting my cheek before hurrying off to give Lily a hug and a kiss as well.
I turned to see that Dad was standing close to me now, unable to avoid me any longer and there was no way he'd missed Mum mentioning Scorpius. I looked him dead in the eye and raised a challenging eyebrow. A muscle in his cheek twitched but he didn't look away.
"You want a hug and a kiss, too?" I asked, and it was a dare more than an invitation.
He sighed and swallowed heavily before pulling me in for a firm hug, calling my bluff. My anger rose again as he held me tightly, and a thread of sadism curled my lip.
"To answer your question from last night," I hissed low in his ear, gripping him to prevent him to pulling away, "we switch. We fuck each other. We take turns dragging our knots in and out of each other until we're both sobbing and ready to blow."
He inhaled sharply, his arms going slack enough for me to step away from him. I didn't bother hiding my smirk as I pulled away. He looked as stricken then as he had last night when I'd left him on the bathroom floor.
Keeping my tone casual in case I was overheard by passersby, I said, "I know Mum's going out of town for a few days next week to report on Quidditch training camps in France and Italy. Whatever shall you do to keep yourself entertained while you're all alone?"
His eyes widened further as he shuffled uncomfortably, blinking away from me. I couldn't stop the sneer that twisted my lips before I turned and hopped up onto the train without a backwards glance.
A little over a week later, I received an owl from home during dinner. At first the parchment appeared to be blank, but then words slowly began to curl across the middle of the page in my Dad's handwriting:
"Charmed ink. Read only when you're completely alone. Incantation: 'Nodos Luporum'".
Then the words faded as quickly as they'd appeared. I smirked and stuffed the letter in my robes before anyone around me noticed.
It sat heavy – in intrigue if not in weight – in my pocket for several more hours, until Scorpius was finally nodding off at our study table in the Common Room and he declared that he'd had enough. We were the last ones still awake so he gave me a languid goodnight kiss before gathering his things and heading up to our dormitory.
This is what I'd been waiting for.
I pulled the neatly-folded parchment out of my pocket and tapped it with my wand, just like I might've with the Marauder's Map.
"Nodos Luporum," I said quietly, and the letter slowly appeared line by line, as if written in real-time by an invisible hand.
Dear Albus,
I need to apologize for my behavior the last night of Easter holiday. I realize now that I should not have put you in the position that I did. I desperately hope you understand that my insistence on learning of any changes from Craglin's attack came solely from a place of concern for your well-being, and was not intended as an attempt to harass or embarrass you. I am endlessly grateful for the trust you showed me that night, even if you were self-conscious. If you felt coerced, I am truly sorry, and I hope you can forgive me.
I am also proud of you for coming out about both your sexuality and your relationship with Scorpius. I sincerely wish you two the best of luck. I won't tell your mother without your permission, and it's of course up to Scorpius to tell Draco if and when he chooses to do so. My lips are sealed until you're ready for others to know. Just promise me that you two will be careful and safe. Take care of each other.
I must also admit that the…gift...that you left for me that night has had my mind in tangles. I kept it hidden until your mother left for her trip a few days ago. I was torn on whether or not to use it, however I suppose this is hardly the first time the lure of adventure, even in the face of grave peril and accompanied by wicked poor sense, has gotten the best of me. I went through with it and I'm slightly ashamed to admit that I massively enjoyed it. I won't trouble you again or ever say anything more about it, unless you choose to bring it up. I certainly won't breathe a word of it to another soul for as long as I live, not now that I know what it's like. Thank you for sharing this with me, Albus. It was an experience that I was never meant to have but am grateful for all the same. And again, I sincerely hope I can earn your forgiveness for the way this whole ordeal came about.
You are a lucky young man and so is Scorpius. Dear Merlin, but you boys are damn lucky.
Take care and I'll see you at the end of term.
Love,
Dad
I was more touched than I'd cared to admit at his profound apologies and the pride he expressed in me, but I also couldn't help but laugh that he'd actually gone for the Polyjuice Potion offer. That was gutsy, part of me was convinced he'd never do it.
But I was also surprised to find that I was okay with it. I had a feeling that he'd be wrestling with the guilt for a while – guilt that he'd watched me, kissed me, became me; guilt that he'd enjoyed every dirty fucking second of it. That thought alone cleared my head and oddly, my conscience as well. My pettiness and sadism were purring happily over his humiliation. I won that round after all, didn't I, old man?
Still laughing heartily, I tossed the letter into the fireplace and watched as it crumpled and turned completely to ash before I packed up my books and headed up to bed.
~ fin ~